If the WORLD was created by a programmer

Nov 7, 2017 11:37 AM

Myrani

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163590

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2389

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99

#funny

If imgur content was created by a reposter... well, what do you know..?

8 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

All of this is just an insult to good programming practice. Seriously. "Stackoverflow said it's fine" is NOT an argument.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Someone put that third panel into the second person, please.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I remember the confusion and fear I felt when I went from SQL to NoSQL and learned about denormalization.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Little Bobby Drop.tables

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hahaha this is hilarious I understand all of what are undoubtedly the jokes

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Lol the img wouldn't load Wich is also something that might be true of the title

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

again and again

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I was ready hate all over this...but then...it was so so right

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

(dontquit)$dayjob

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

if you like this, go check out Off to be The Wizard by Scott Meyer

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

At least Toggl is self-aware of their cobbled-together software ...

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I didn't even try to understand what that was about

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Underqualified web-designers-turned-programmers think every programmer is like them. My code is pristine and works flawlessly... eventually.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

that last frame really hits home for me. The whole thing does, but jfc...screw mongodb

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ok this was fucken brilliant

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

More like created a whole world on github then forgot about it and you feel bad for doing nothing with it.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

this was great

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Fine, after seeing this reposted the 1000000th time I'll finally read it.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Where's the part when we steal parts of other worlds 'cause it's easier than self-implementing?

8 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

It's not stealing. Code reuse is recommended procedure.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

There's a difference between code reuse and grabbing snippets from the interwebs and incorporating them into the solution.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's half of the reference I'm making, yes.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I LOL'd at the JavaScript libraries:] +1

8 years ago | Likes 62 Dislikes 1

Seriously, from someone outside of web-dev, why does the landscape of frameworks and libraries look like that, where many do the same?

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

A lot of people that need to do the same thing, but can't find an existing library (because it hasn't been released yet), so they make their

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

own. Eventually they all get released within 6 months of each other.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Legacy crap!. Ive got an outage, no one knows how it works or how it can be fixed because the dev that created it is loong gone.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

or in python: import universe

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

ParsingError: Error, got an unexpected token $end at line: 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Snapchat happened when someone tried to back flickr with mongodb

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

absolutely love this. I’m a heavy scientific Python user but recently started learning some web stuff. the js world seems so fragmented

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

People can hate on Javascript all they want, but that shit is not going anywhere.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

that’s why I started learning it; the damn thing has too much momentum. js seems to be stealing Python features which is a good sign

8 years ago | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

Node.js is amazing and the V8 engine from google is crazy.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You’re absolutely right, it’s funny because I’m learning python because I️ want to go from Web development to data science.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

it’s an interesting field but I feel like it’s getting saturated with all these boot camps / pseudo degrees. good luck to you

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Those boot camps produce some of the best programmers I’ve seen honestly. I️f they learn computer science then they’re actually better.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

God is a programmer hence why there are so many bugs

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

FEATURES!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I’m a software engineer and all I understood was the react and mongodb joke lmao

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Where is the big thing that noone knows what does or how it works, but all you know if removed everything stops working? Aka Legacy code.

8 years ago | Likes 340 Dislikes 2

you mean dna?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Those are dinosaurs. The programmer put them there during an all night cram and forgot to comment, without them the light doesn't turn on

8 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Oh god... I'm working with that right now. Put that shit in a service program and keep it out of my program.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"everything runs on dependencies"

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My buddy found some legacy code that said //Do not remove this comment; the code will not compile. ... deleting this comment broke the code.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"//Stuff, maybe some things, I dunno." - Every previous coder at my current job.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I love reprogramming legacy code though. Programming around it is while time effective, creates creep. And creep will be noticed by the user

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Used to call that "Black Magic".

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

By the end of the comic that's just everything from the start of the comic.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Dark matter/energy. It's invisible and intangible but makes up 70%+ of the known universe, and affects the gravitation of regular matter.

8 years ago | Likes 155 Dislikes 2

I was also thinking of the forces such as EM and that they likely existed before the big bang and helped map the universe as we know it.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

So ADA and Assembly...

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It is in fact the paperwork on the 30%

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Sounds mysterious and stuff, but then you realize it actually just means, "We don't know what it is yet".

8 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 0

We don't really know what reality is anyways. We just know what our perception of it is.

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's a fun thought experiment. We have literally no way of knowing whether our 'reality' is a simulation or not. Maybe we're all NPCs.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Well who or what is the player then if we are npc?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Isn't, like, all code legacy code? I mean, at what point is it *not* legacy code once it's in production?

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

It becomes legacy the moment the first work-a-round is born, due to nobody wanting to touch the old system

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

That would be religion. At least until the 2.0 update is released from what I assume is beta testing right now.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

But 2.0 NEVER releases, because the scope creep never ends.... Ever....

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No its users fault. Won't let go of outdated systems no forward compatibility

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nah man. Users are "easy* to shift. It's the B2B stuff that hardens like frozen puss

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The exact history of the creation of minecraft :D

8 years ago | Likes 178 Dislikes 13

Ew

8 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 195

Ew yourself.

8 years ago | Likes 72 Dislikes 5

I'm "ew"ing Minecraft..

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 171

Minecraft is a fantastic game, lol.

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 2

We know. That's why we downvoted you.

8 years ago | Likes 98 Dislikes 7

This is surprising

8 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 3

Lol

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 5

I'm sticking to my guns, only people who play Minecraft are nobs! Terraria for life

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 36

8 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

Bc they're both life sucking games that are similar enough that imma take the one that is better

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 8

Clearly a 12 y/o that's outgrown Minecraft thinking it's just for kids and that Terraria is what the grown ups are playing.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Nope lol 25.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 9

38 yr old here. Play both of them (and Starbound too) and i enjoy every minute of the chosen path, of playing a fantasy character.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Can someone explain the last part about Mongodb to my friend? I managed to more or less explain him everything apart from that part.

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Mongodb is regularly bashed on by various "serious" programming communities due to its historical shortcomings and the fact that it's NoSQL.

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

When it fails it sometimes returns 0. Sometimes it returns 0.0. Surprise!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It's not that it's NoSQL, it's that it's a collection of ad-hoc hacks, has unsafe defaults, is not faster than a relational DB,

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Nah, being NoSQL is a big part in it. The wankers in places like /r/programming constantly do some retarted strawmen like 1/2

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"but all data is durhur relational so use a relational database hurdur", which just betrays their own lack of knowledge on the subject. 2/2

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Also many of the unsafe defaults are there no longer. Like the one where Mongo would listen to all connections without a password, hah.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

has a lot of silly code out in the wild, does not have a mathematical model backing it, but it sure is easy not having to normalize data!

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Don't remember if they fixed it or not, but it used to not write anything to the hard drive until you told it to save, it would store

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

EVERYTHING in the RAM. Made it fairly fast while creating databases, but if your computer crashed or something before you saved, you'd lose

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah, as I said, unsafe defaults. Instead of tuning it to be faster, you'd tune it to be safer... Which is insane.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Proper journaling has been around for like, +5 years. Nowadays Mongo passes Jepsen tests. Mongo's transactions are totally reliable on 1/2

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0