Feb 27, 2020 1:57 AM
amberbamgray12345360
71315
1804
123
cyberghduck
Thats like 340 socks a day for 80 years
BklynPunisher
#1 for imgur users would also include how many times they’ve masturbated.
UmamiMama
Yes, yes, and yes
Makerofroads
Did the math, that is taking 20 shots of vodka almost every weekend for 70 years. Intense.
GreaseMonkeyOfLove
Curse words: ♾ Lost socks: 0 Shots of vodka: 1
MiniSchrader
In reference to the first pic: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CJ53kstD-14
Spitfight
Assuming you start drinking at 22 and live to 80 that roughly 2.4 shots of vodka a day. So less than I thought it would be.
mrfloris
The last one is true, and could be abbreviated to just "life"
xSocksMan
Lost socks, the real tragedy
snazzily
I wonder if when you die your bid data analyst tells you all that shit.
bambulina
Like the very old & very young, the ocean doesn't give a fuck about you, personally. It's less a matter of age & more a matter of learning.
Montanaebananae
A lot of the anger in this I feel very much so. Now I’m concerned about myself and booking an appointment with my therapist. Thanks for that
sugarNspiceNnice
Appreciate this small dump. And you. Thank you.
mjs2353
#1 unless that swear word count is set to daily, as a college student those are rookie numbers
highdefsoul89
Upvoted for the first and last picture.
ILoveLacey2
r/boomerhumor
detour512
Times Rubbed One Out - still calculating - WHAT THE, YOU'RE DEAD STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!!!! St. Peter he won't stoooop...
caustickiwii
#1 Stat 1: reasonable. Stat 2: ridiculous. Stat 3: ludicrous. That 3 vodka shots and 450 lost socks a day for 60 years straight.
Muunk
Snooze button presses: 4,974,045
ScarecrowSticks
sittingfarawayfromtheworld
How many times you wank yourself, if I am not in the top ten then I'll be very disappointed.
vranky
Walking up the stairs will get you upstairs and walking down will have the opposite effect.
iwanttomountndewya
For that last one, ones kindness is always appreciated but there should always be a cut off point. For ones own sanity.
jotchy
I rather be put in a fucked up situation than put someone else there.
Tyrannotron
Having a bad heart can get you into even more fucked up situations.
You not wrong!
Raydeeo
That’s 2,7 metric tonnes of vodka. 36 litres a year if you count from the day you’re turning 18 until you’re 93. One 70cl bottle a week.
69cl per week to be exact. Nice.
CT1space3DX
Beers.....I want the beers count. No, wait......I'm gonna work on a list.
thedudewhodoesabide
Ill wait for youre report.
Your* damn phone
yourbassist
That's 3 shots a day for 63 years.
bixby66
And 439 lost socks a day.
Eldis
The average person with that consumption could drop dead after ten or so years due to alcohol damage.
I'm still ticking.
Operative words are "could" and "average", here. But please, for your own sake, please stop. .__.
Nearlyburly
#5 I honestly believe my life would be a lot better if i was an asshole.
It’s never too late to start.
cummygums
I thought the same, until I saw where assholes ended up. They’ll get there’s soon enough . And when they do, they’ll wish they were you.
macpall
I feel the opposite. Certain relationships wouldn’t have ended, friends would still be here or made, and I would be sitting here alone now..
GreekCelt
Adopt mild asshole like tendencies. Keep it in perspective. It doesn't make you an asshole if you say no.
iDrinkDrano
The trick is the same as with a good sex life: well timed assholing.
Taokan22
This. You gotta balance yourself and others, and help others because you choose to and not because they made you feel guilt/pity.
PrinceofProcrastination
It would make certain things easier. Like talking to someone you don't like who thinks you're chums. But I just don't have the heart for it.
MeanMisterClean
There's a good chance that you actually are
Maldraek
No good deed goes unpunished.
DrRad
As an asshole, my life is fucking awesome.
mjg102110
I second this
[deleted]
CubanThunda
How drunk were you when you responded?
Sober for 24 years
Adda kid
LOL That was after 5 years of drinking and black outs.
BornOnAMonday83
I'm a huge asshole. Until you get to know me. If you can get past that then you're worth my energy and you'll never meet a kinder more loyal
Soul.
Manateesirena11
Asshole?
cyberghduck
Thats like 340 socks a day for 80 years
BklynPunisher
#1 for imgur users would also include how many times they’ve masturbated.
UmamiMama
Yes, yes, and yes
Makerofroads
Did the math, that is taking 20 shots of vodka almost every weekend for 70 years. Intense.
GreaseMonkeyOfLove
Curse words: ♾ Lost socks: 0 Shots of vodka: 1
MiniSchrader
In reference to the first pic: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CJ53kstD-14
Spitfight
Assuming you start drinking at 22 and live to 80 that roughly 2.4 shots of vodka a day. So less than I thought it would be.
mrfloris
The last one is true, and could be abbreviated to just "life"
xSocksMan
Lost socks, the real tragedy
snazzily
I wonder if when you die your bid data analyst tells you all that shit.
bambulina
Like the very old & very young, the ocean doesn't give a fuck about you, personally. It's less a matter of age & more a matter of learning.
Montanaebananae
A lot of the anger in this I feel very much so. Now I’m concerned about myself and booking an appointment with my therapist. Thanks for that
sugarNspiceNnice
Appreciate this small dump. And you. Thank you.
mjs2353
#1 unless that swear word count is set to daily, as a college student those are rookie numbers
highdefsoul89
Upvoted for the first and last picture.
ILoveLacey2
r/boomerhumor
detour512
Times Rubbed One Out - still calculating - WHAT THE, YOU'RE DEAD STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!!!! St. Peter he won't stoooop...
caustickiwii
#1 Stat 1: reasonable. Stat 2: ridiculous. Stat 3: ludicrous. That 3 vodka shots and 450 lost socks a day for 60 years straight.
Muunk
Snooze button presses: 4,974,045
ScarecrowSticks
sittingfarawayfromtheworld
How many times you wank yourself, if I am not in the top ten then I'll be very disappointed.
vranky
Walking up the stairs will get you upstairs and walking down will have the opposite effect.
iwanttomountndewya
For that last one, ones kindness is always appreciated but there should always be a cut off point. For ones own sanity.
jotchy
I rather be put in a fucked up situation than put someone else there.
Tyrannotron
Having a bad heart can get you into even more fucked up situations.
amberbamgray12345360
You not wrong!
Raydeeo
That’s 2,7 metric tonnes of vodka. 36 litres a year if you count from the day you’re turning 18 until you’re 93. One 70cl bottle a week.
Raydeeo
69cl per week to be exact. Nice.
CT1space3DX
Beers.....I want the beers count. No, wait......I'm gonna work on a list.
amberbamgray12345360
thedudewhodoesabide
Ill wait for youre report.
thedudewhodoesabide
Your* damn phone
yourbassist
That's 3 shots a day for 63 years.
bixby66
And 439 lost socks a day.
Eldis
The average person with that consumption could drop dead after ten or so years due to alcohol damage.
yourbassist
I'm still ticking.
Eldis
Operative words are "could" and "average", here. But please, for your own sake, please stop. .__.
Nearlyburly
#5 I honestly believe my life would be a lot better if i was an asshole.
BklynPunisher
It’s never too late to start.
cummygums
I thought the same, until I saw where assholes ended up. They’ll get there’s soon enough . And when they do, they’ll wish they were you.
macpall
I feel the opposite. Certain relationships wouldn’t have ended, friends would still be here or made, and I would be sitting here alone now..
GreekCelt
Adopt mild asshole like tendencies. Keep it in perspective. It doesn't make you an asshole if you say no.
iDrinkDrano
The trick is the same as with a good sex life: well timed assholing.
Taokan22
This. You gotta balance yourself and others, and help others because you choose to and not because they made you feel guilt/pity.
PrinceofProcrastination
It would make certain things easier. Like talking to someone you don't like who thinks you're chums. But I just don't have the heart for it.
MeanMisterClean
There's a good chance that you actually are
Maldraek
No good deed goes unpunished.
DrRad
As an asshole, my life is fucking awesome.
mjg102110
I second this
[deleted]
[deleted]
CubanThunda
How drunk were you when you responded?
Nearlyburly
Sober for 24 years
CubanThunda
Adda kid
Nearlyburly
LOL That was after 5 years of drinking and black outs.
BornOnAMonday83
I'm a huge asshole. Until you get to know me. If you can get past that then you're worth my energy and you'll never meet a kinder more loyal
BornOnAMonday83
Soul.
Manateesirena11
Asshole?
BklynPunisher