You can't choose your family

I haven't always had the strongest relationship with my mother and a lot of people judge me badly for it.

I always get "but she's your mum" or "she carried you for 9 months" and even the "you should be grateful you have a mum" but she is just an irrational, irresponsible attention seeker who has done so much to make me despise her as a person.
LONG POST WARNING: Sorry in advance for the long rant but I need to get this off my chest.

**** FP EDIT: um, holy shit. I was not expecting the amount of love and support you guys have given me.

To clarify a few things:
1. My dad paid for my sister to move to the country he lives in after she turned 18 so fortunately she got a fresh start and is now living a healthier happier life.

2. I have tried on several occasions to cut mum out but she always weaves her way back in. My dad has always encouraged us to keep in contact with mum despite the fact that she is bonkers because it is 'morally the right thing to do'. Fortunately he is there for us to listen to all the drama as they crop up.

3. Mum does not think there is anything wrong with her. No matter what approach we take, whether it is being a hard ass or nurturing things always become messy. Now I try to remain neutral. I'll give advice but if she refuses to listen I just grab the popcorn, sit back and watch her dig herself into a hole.

4. Thank you everyone again for your support in the comments and private messages. I will check out the subreddits you suggested as it seems like a safe place for me to open up to people in a similar situation and without the judgement. Shout out to @piocz for making me laugh.

Stay awesome!

I was 53 kg and 5'2 and for girls it is normal to develop hips and boobs when the hormones kick in

but no, according to my mum I was getting really fat and needed to go on a crash diet. She even tried to encourage me to go lengths without eating because its what she did/does. I exercised for 4 hours every day, went days without eating and started to make myself vomit after eating and she didn't even think anything wrong with it. I ended up getting down to 46 kg before my dad noticed and tried to help me to become healthy again.

She has always exaggerated her back problems.

One minute she would be walking around the house or moving furniture around and as soon as someone came to the door or we had to go out somewhere it would be "ooooowwwww my back" and "I need my wheelchair I can't walk". I am not saying she doesn't have a bad back but it is fucking annoying how she milks it to get attention.

So after my mum and dad separated my sister moved in with my dad and my dad wanted one of us to stay with mum. We argued a lot, particularly about her drinking every night, her so called back problems, her always complaining about my father, her unreasonable spending and her picking at my self esteem. As such I hid out in my room whenever I was home. I was talking to my bf at the time over msn and trying to do home work with some friends and she started up a chat which I ignored. She kept trying to chat and when I didn't respond she started yelling out to me, stormed down to my room yelling at me (already half drunk). I explained to her that I didn't want to chat to her online if we were in the same house and she exploded. We fought, I pushed her out of the room and she tried to push open the door while yelling at me. After a bit she called me a slut (which hurt because I was sexually assaulted the year before) and an ungrateful little bitch and then told me to pack up my things and get out.

I lived with my dad for a short time but had to make the decision to move country or fend for myself

My dad had to declare bankruptcy because despite my dad working 60 to 80 hour weeks burning himself into the ground to support the family my mum was spending twice as much as he was making. By the time I finished my senior year my dad had made the decision that he was going to move to another country to start over and his girlfriend (now wife) was going to pay for the flights. I wanted to stay behind because my sister was still here as she wasn't able to move as she was under 18. Near the end of her final year when my sister came home from school and saw mum waving to her in a taxi. She tried to call her but mum hung up the call and texted back saying that she was going away for a while. She didn't answer where, when or why and didn't even think to leave my sister with money to get food or bus fare. No worries mum, just pack up your shit and go. Not like you have a child or pets or anything. My sister called me in tears and I ended up having to console her for a few weeks whilst providing her with groceries and money to get the bus. To this day mum never offered an apology for that.

This happened in my 1st and 3rd year while I was at uni. I already struggled with keeping in contact with people due to the hours I worked and studied but if I didn't talk to my mum she would go to extremes to get the attention she craved. All up she has tried to commit suicide 4 times and got put in hospital for 'amnesia' on another occasion.

This one irks me a lot.

I don't understand why you would mistreat any animals in this way. If an animal doesn't eat something naturally in the wild why the hell would you feed it to them on a daily basis? Bread and biscuits are worse than junk food but she feeds it to them because they love it. Like, I enjoy McDonalds, but I am not going to eat ridiculous proportions on a daily basis, it just isn't healthy.

It is like she is an emotional teenager.

It's not so frequent now but still happens every now and then but I used to get called up on a weekly basis (at least) in the middle of the night cos mum 'had a bottle of bubbly' and wanted to talk. It's fine, not like I worked 40 hours a week and was doing full time study and needed sleep anyway. Please mum, continue on rambling about how shit and abusive my dad is and how you got the raw deal in life. Also, do not forget to repeat the same points to me for the millionth time.

As part of the settlement agreement my dad gave mum his superannuation worth $120K

Although she wasn't able to get it until she turned 55 she managed to get $18k out early for 'emergency' reasons. She turned 55 in July and I found out she has just over $10K left. She is still convinced that she is able to renovate her house and move to the city to be closer to us kids with that amount.

This one is just too stupid for me to be able to comprehend. While it is good she paid off her debts which was about maybe $20 thousand in loans here and there where the fuck did the rest go?

There is no point talking sense into her, mostly because it doesn't make sense to her. You could write it all clearly out on paper but you still would be wrong. Every time I do she gets upset and defensive and makes it seem like you're out to get her.

I actually said this to her once. The only reason I regret it is because of the million text messages and dozens of phone calls after with her bitching at me. Really though she is exhausting to deal with and does way to many stupid things for me to even bring up. It has severely impacted on my mental health and also the rest of my families. Every time I see her number come up on my phone I immediately become infuriated but talk to her because I have to, and by talk I mean she talks and doesn't really let me get a word in edge-ways let alone ask about how I am doing.

Sorry again for the long post but it really is only a summary of the shitty things she has done.

TL;DR: OP's mum is a dick and doesn't care about saying it