Redhead Monday

Mar 14, 2022 11:49 PM

HolyHellJezebel

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165735

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3909

Dislikes

77

I'm a redhead, not this redhead obviously. This reminds me of my 20's. Only swap the espresso martinis for kamikaze shots.

That *whaddoiknow* "mMMm" of white bread is the best...

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

* antacid intensifies *

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

All that mixing > everybody out!

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

To the front page!

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

Liver: She did WHAT?!?!?!

4 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 1

Highly recommend this skit as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYyBkFjAjFY

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

So relatable

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Next pane is the Taco Bell street poop meme that keeps getting me banned…

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

What?

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Damn... I don't drink anymore but I'd like to talk to that box of wine.

4 years ago | Likes 48 Dislikes 1

..and that's the point where the stomach says: "Everybody get out the way you came in. NOW! OUT!!!"

4 years ago | Likes 50 Dislikes 1

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Who is this?

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Boxes of wine can be dangerous because you can't see how much is gone... until it begins to only dribble out, then it's tilt box time.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Single slice of white bread is going to be getting kicked out real soon.

4 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Who is this? She's really funny.

4 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 1

Meanwhile the liver starts getting ready for war.

4 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

Yeah, her liver is just a girl in camo, green facepaint & sitting in a bunker now lol

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Jim Brewer did this 20 years ago

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

4 years ago | Likes 161 Dislikes 2

Shit birds flock together randy

4 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

4 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 0

“I am the liquor” RIP

4 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

Hey@OP, You got more attractive every year in your Christmas selfies. goddamn. That's not how aging is supposed to work!

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

When you wear 55+ Spf all the time that's how it works

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

or just have good African jeans, like me and a billion others Africans...I still use SPF15 in my face cream though.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Stomach is about to send someone in a puke green dress back

4 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Wtf is an espresso martini!?

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

Something to make you feel less drunk than you really are to make it easier to get alcohol poisoning.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Relatively easy to make. Vodka(espresso flavored even) and liqueurs. The most basic bar in the US could make one.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I like the cut of her jib

4 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

"Can you please state your full name please." - This bugs me bugs.

4 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Just like how people in the service industry ends every sentence with "today".

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I do this relatively frequently, by the time I get to the end of the sentence I forget I’d I said please already so I say it again

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Holy Hell

4 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 1

Jezebel

4 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

I was expecting sea-men

4 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 3

Damn. She’s gonna have a good time. For a bit.

4 years ago | Likes 529 Dislikes 1

And likely will not remember any of it.

4 years ago | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

Should have ended with the stomache saying "Alright, everyone out. All of you leave the way you came" and pushing everyone out.

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Drink maximum water for less hangover. Tortillas with hummus for "pregame" food if bunch of wine is involved

4 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

My problem is I don’t get hangovers. Even if I get absolutely blackout drunk.

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

...yet. I used to be like that. Used to.

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Good time followed by one of the worst times she's ever had, based on my experience anyway

4 years ago | Likes 86 Dislikes 1

4 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

It’s perfect conditions for getting railed in a sundress.

4 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 2

*Throwing up on a sundress*

4 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Both

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

That's how you drink on a budget, kids.

4 years ago | Likes 903 Dislikes 1

Pfff.. rookies.. two words : Vodka Tampons. Works for both male and female.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Donate blood. Every 8 weeks, I get schmammied on like 4 seltzers/ciders/wine coolers.

4 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Forgot to eat dinner once and was on meds I shouldn’t drink on. Had 3 drinks and blacked out for 7 hours.

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Nah eat that butter. Fat is a better buffer for alcohol than carbs.

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

A good time and a bad hangover.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Oh fuck yeah, you buy a $60 and a bunch of bread, hashbrowns, and hotdogs. Go forth.

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Free Breadsticks.

4 years ago | Likes 34 Dislikes 3

Fuck no, Breadsticks is guilty and deserves every bit of the sentence.

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

If we can pardon turkey, we can pardon Breadsticks too. Free Breadsticks.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Boones Farms/Mad Dog 20/20 and 40s to pregame, cheap ass beer at the bar, shots at home and sop it up in the morning with all the grease.

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

?

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No four lokos?

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Oh this was a time far behind those haha. I was in college from 03-07 and I got over partying by 25. I'm done after a half glass of wine now

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

She reminds me of the tall redhead EA from Suits.

4 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Me: I'm sorry but I'm afraid I can't serve you any more alcohol this evening, can I get you a glass of water? Her: whitdyemeanyirnoservinme>

4 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 3

ah'll huv yoor job ya wee fanny, ah'm a payin' customer, jist dae yir fucken' job an pour the drinks ya p**f. Me: Security to the bar please

4 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 3

How to be refused service and barred for life within 5 mins.

4 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 2

If they can't hold their liquor, sure. I've been sober enough to serve after 17 drinks in 15 mins. Takes an annoying amount to get drunk

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 4

If you came to my venue and ordered 17 drinks in 15 mins and weren't with 16 other folk, you'd be refused service. We have a responsibility>

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

under the current law, we are vigilant, and it matters not to the law how well you can handle the booze. You can however do what you like >

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

at home, off sales are not policed anywhere near as stringently.

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

That's, uh... not remotely normal. Unless they were thimble-sized drinks.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Trust me, I'm aware as hell how weird it is. It's expensive and annoying to drink enough to feel it much but my liver is a goddamn beast.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

The only explanation I can think of is genetic. Alcohol and cannabis just blow right through me at hilarious levels.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I am legitimately not kidding: have you considered donating your body to science? If you could prove that alcohol capacity, I bet there'd be

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Are you..... VERY large?

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nah, 170lbs. 40 shots last new years at home tho. Just an insane alcohol metabolism rate, think I just gave a great liver

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Remember, one glass of alcoholic beverage, one glass of water. Or you know, just drink less alcohol

4 years ago | Likes 336 Dislikes 21

Huh? As a professional drinker who's had maybe 4 hangovers in their life. I'm not sure where this information is coming from.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 9

Just drink vodka mixed with gatorade 50/50

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I don't do one for one but I've always got water w me

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

And you know. Eat dinner too haha

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Also B vitamins! Thiamine depletion is real.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Gatorade. Works better than water, especially after the fact. Or... uh... so I've heard.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

My colleague kept saying that one night. We found him the next morning passed out in a closet in a puddle of piss.

4 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Or just get everything on the rocks, save time!

4 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

4 years ago | Likes 59 Dislikes 1

Fuck No! Never stop the madness! But yah, drink a bit of water when getting pissed, it's good for you.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

4 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

So for every glass of water I drink, I should have a glass of wine. Brilliant! I'm not drinking nearly enough

4 years ago | Likes 161 Dislikes 1

Oh crap I’ve drank 8 glasses of water only so far, let me catch up

4 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 1

v

4 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 1

Do you have something like this buy for pot?

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Umm drink water because you’ll get cotton mouth. If you do edibles, less is more. That’s all I got though.

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Same. Body dehydrates because it metabolizes the drug. But compared to alcohol it's almost negligible. At least for me.^^

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Its incredible how well this actually works. Just don't cheat. Don't say "okay I'll drink two glasses after this next one." If you're >>

4 years ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 3

getting up to pee every 45 minutes, its working. As annoying as it is, its better than feeling like death the next day. //

4 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 2

Taking a large dose of vitamin B at the start also helps.

4 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

Okay so as someone who is super into researching this stuff (no background in biology, so take everything I say with a pinch of salt) and >>

4 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

whos hobby is collecting and drinking beers, heres what I have to say about what you can eat or drink that actually helps with hangovers. >>

4 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1