OatmealBreakfast
97075
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Apparently I was embryo #9
As TheMostModestMouse mentioned about themselves, I was also a C-section baby so technically I've never been born.
FP Edit: Hooray for medical science!
Send Tubes.
neallo
Now, this is what I call original content. This is something special. Thanks @op.
StopStalkingMyDamnImgurAccountRosa
Use it to breed other things.. Make it a multi use womb
worb84
IVF has netted me 1 current child, and one in the oven
deathbycheese
WAIT... WHAT????? C-section baby are technically never born? OK what am I oing here for that last 50 years?
quade
The 21st century version of "Love Potion #9"
sleepingbambi
Science is so fucking cool. It blows me away every time I think about fertility opportunities for people.
neallo
Womb for a Few? You have a cool Star Trek name, then: “9 of ...."
OatmealBreakfast
My thoughts exactly.
neallo
I love how your parents kept the dish. That says a lot about how important it was; that you have it is so cool.
McFluffySundae
I was conceived when my parents got snowed in at the Denny's my mom worked at in the blizzard of 93
wantednokes
neat
anotherloon
Mambo No. 9
TheMostModestMouse
Technically I have never been born. I was a C-section baby!
OatmealBreakfast
I was also a C-section baby!
sensoryte
Do you think science has gone too far, not far enough or just hit the sweet spot?
InterestedGarchomp
What does the writing say?
OatmealBreakfast
My mom's last name and the number 9
blooregardqkazoo
So if you're out of clean dishes....
wadenelson1
Do you remember seeing the lab tech unzipping?
EmotionallyUnstableAndPossiblyViolentAnakinSkywalker
Do you call it mom?
gameskilledvideostar
She is such a dish
OatmealBreakfast
I mean technically it's my first apartment.
Raeilgunne
what's the rent?
whoisyourdaddy
Back then it was hard to get an egg in there safely; then Dad just jacked off and tried to get some in it. Take that image to bed tonight.
Cyansky
Awesome. My friend has pics of her and her sister as little embryos.
TheFIoridaMan
A little bit of oatmeal is what I eat... a little bit of breakfast is what I need... this is embryo number 9 (Mambo #5)
IHeartBouncyThings
Looks more sanitary than the one I was conceived in
bleaklKing
Why did they name you op ?
Magpiebones
Number 9 is alive!
SeeMyVests
wow you were really really wanted. how special!
youratbastardstookallthegoodusernames
https://johnmartinart.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/106-test-tube-baby-colour.jpg
BitchButcher
You probably have 8 other siblings .. or clones? Anybody else read Ken Follett's The Third Twin? ;)
GordonDavidson
Please tell me you've quoted Austin powers during an argument "I hate you, I hate you, I wish I was never artificially created in the lab"
OatmealBreakfast
I have not but I will now!
NotTheHeroWeNeed
And to think you could have been Eleven, had nose bleeds and eat waffles
OatmealBreakfast
I just get migraines and eat pancakes.
Tassyr
.... Huh. I don't know if this would be more or less unsettling than dad telling me the exact counter and position I was conceived on.
OatmealBreakfast
Definitely less. At least in my opinion. I'd rather imagine a laboratory than my parents fucking.
jmulderr
Well, ya got that on the rest of us. I'm certainly not saving the location where I was conceived.
nomatchingsocks
Kalamazoo for me. Glad I wasn't named after it.
voldewhore
I was conceived on a washing machine on the spin cycle at a family get together.
wifi12345678910
My parents didn't save my petri dish :(
Morg729
You don't keep your mom around?
Un0riginalComment
Hell no!
cyno01
I was conceived in Stevens Point, but thankfully thats as specific as my knowledge of the event gets.
cheesymouth
Big sis was conceived at a Howard Johnson Inn. Parents dong remember where I was made
jmulderr
I'm gunna assume "dong" was not a typo.
cheesymouth
More of a Freudian slip, apparently
ConsumerOfStories
@OP Genuinely curious, when did you find out and how exactly did your "birds and the bees" talk go?
KingWilldaBeast
Son, when an eye-dropper loves a Petri dish...
HopeIdontmisspellmynaem
This made me laugh out loud! Thanks.
OatmealBreakfast
When I was about 15 I think. My dad didn't want to tell me, my mom did. We have to keep it a secret from my Roman Catholic Italian Family.
OatmealBreakfast
My sex ed talk was my parents giving me a pile of books about it and being like, "well, there it is."
Mirilali
Sounds about on par with my dad randomly giving me a 'Sex for Dummies' book in my late teens.. Ermm, thanks Dad..
yobego
The sex talk with my parents never happened because they let the school sort that out.
OddOne8
My Sex talk was when i turned 14 I got handed a Playboy Magazine and a condom. That was it.
Totallyscrewedinaustin
Nice. I got a VHS tape and had to sit there with my mom and watch it. Asked after if I had any questions. "Nope!" It was awkward!
neallo
What talk?
Totallyscrewedinaustin
The sex talk your parents give you around the time you hit puberty. The "birds and the bees" talk.
plainoldusername
My dad looked at me while I was waiting on my ride to school and asked “You fuckin?”
experiencemike
If I become a dad, I imagine this is what I would say to my 12 year old
plainoldusername
I was 16 I think. First “real” girlfriend. Wanted to tell him “I’m tryin!”
SlightlyMoreAppropriateUsername
Depends on your kid really, my bf's dad talks like that to him and it's really awkward because the vulgarity is out of character for my bf
pr0nty
If you become a dad, don't wait until they're 12 before broaching the subject.
HomoSumHumaniAMeNihilAlienumPuto
it's made of clear plastic so you could say you had a womb with a view.
ImNotWhatISayIAm
Sur..... Brevo
GetGonked
Bravo sir, bravo
weeniehutjunior69
Gold
satirelyinsane
LobsterBandito
GetGonked
Bravo sir, bravo. I nearly spat out my drink
foofypoops
Is that a GWAR reference?
HomoSumHumaniAMeNihilAlienumPuto
Not an intentional reference, no. I had never heard of GWAR before you mentioned it.
foofypoops
If you like nonsense overly dramatic and ridiculous metal, and have a sick sense of humor, check them out. If not, um, don't?
foofypoops
Their stage prop ate Mark in Empire Records, and they were reoccurring guests on the Jerry Springer show, if that gives you an idea.
arbanblade
Weird Al rip off.
LordGrimstoned
Definitely a gwat reference
PecosBill
I think I'm a clone now.
ThePoorWarrior
Something something everyone of me is a hand me downnnn? I think. I refuse to look up lyrics so there ya go. I think that’s it. Good day.
tripurari
Oh I know this by heart, we had the record on repeat as a kid. "Every chromosome is a hand me down"
IOnlyFavoriteDickButtAndImNotEvenMad
This is also correct.
IOnlyFavoriteDickButtAndImNotEvenMad
Pair of genes. Every pair of genes is a hand me down. God, why do I know that?
TinnyOctopus
Because life is better when you can stay at home when you're out of town.