Srajo101
77205
1447
20
Jul 6, 2021 1:48 AM
Srajo101
77205
1447
20
Problemwoodchuck
Bigby's Unpredictable Fist
Uristqwerty
If the target hides under something, how much energy will it spend forcing through a wall/roof? Can that be exploited for free power?
Makerofthingsmasherofstuff
Handbusters
minipancho94
I would go into business selling oversized thumbtacks. also at that size, just lure it to one of those car shredders. will pull it in futher
friendsofsandwiches
Glove?
CherubCow
BojanglesTheFlyingCar
ButtersTheCat
There would be a lot more tunnels, and the rich would live underground.
SevTai
And then one day four men in a yellow submarine come and restore hope and happiness for all.
SacrificialClam
Question: do I have access to a hollow tungsten ball?
Mithi
It will be a tungsten ball after The Hand is finished with it.
EmptyHouseBurglar
See the yellow submarine... "The glove" freaked me out as a kid
mogdencat1
https://youtu.be/ih4auGvzw4A
Anddroid
Helping hand?
AgnesGooch
The Dreadful Flying Glove!!!
Barrum
This is the premise of super smash bros. It doesn't end well for the hand, nor the hand's brother
Jsupes
Za Hando!
v
Magnisethered
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqOedpKAbkE
Sauroctonus
Oi, Josuke!
friendsofsandwiches
Monty Python was RIGHT!
tacomatacoma
Is this by any chance connected to the Hamburger Helper?
Wasnbo
Sure, it's a common, uniting feature for all of humanity. Then again, we'd STILL find ways to be pissed at each other because one sect (1/2)
Wasnbo
of "Handism" will assert that THE HAND only squishes sinners, and another sect says THE HAND "aggressively chooses" saintly people, (2/3)
Wasnbo
and yet another sect says THE HAND is as capricious as nature itself. Nobody likes that third sect because it's so "middle of the road."
Botticelliii
Hmm anyone ever read the Philosophical Strangler? Reminds me of A Fate Worse Than Death.
shortbutsquat
How is that different than what we already have?
gummbunn
Black and white anyone??
Feralkyn
Accidentally slapped my animal so many times
gummbunn
"Accidentally "
Masinx
Black and white two, my friend. An amazing game.
Drennen
Waiting for the VR remake
whatifgodwasoneofus
Yellow Submarine anyone?
ReelPoop
RVAALLDAY
First thought:
bestlaidmind
Hoped there would be a like-minded individual to post this, thank you.
AlmostScientist
Our childhood has trained us for that day
pandastrafe
I'm even aware of the aforementioned index finger attack
jormundr
In order to survive, we give a fox a gun and throw it at the giant disembodied hand. The fox jumps too far and falls of a cliff.
AtsaMattaForMe
Heisanevilgenius
I'm the only person who thought of the Wallmaster from Zelda?
CherubCow
scuba7jb
NebulousToucan
There'd be a church of the almighty hand.
MindOfMobius
No shit
KD8KKT
Scammers trying to sell hand insurance.
BigDaddysMeatWagon
So you think it would be virtuous to be killed by the hand, or a sign of sin? Probably the latter tbh.
morelikeconsham
I think you just caused a rift in the church of the hand and that there are now two sects.
barbarian818
there'd be dozens of sects of Hand worshippers, all beseeching the Hand to smite the heretical ones.
Kittynomnoms
Every time it smote the "others" they would be reaffirmed, and every time it smote one of their own it'd be revealing "traitors"!
barbarian818
Confirmation bias and Texas sharpshooter fallacy all rolled into one.
Shoujo
Depressingly accurate. I wonder how different cults would interpret if the hand had a different skin color than their own.
ghostofGracchusBabeuf
Unless it follows some discernible pattern I doubt history would significantly change.
Jafarce
The deaths wouldn't make an impact but people's reactions might.
AisforApple
Air travel and other types of high collateral endeavors would wait until just after a hand attack, to minimize risk of catastrophe.
TheInternetNeedsMoreCats
Hand deaths would become excluded from life insurance and a new Hand Insurance industry would rise.
HaikuSorrow
USA, huh?
TheInternetNeedsMoreCats
Yup haha
semperfi891
If it could crush one person, and slap 50 others per day, I'd be down with that
LeagueOfIncrementallySizedOctopi
With no reason or logic as to who it crushes/slaps? Sounds unpleasant.
bigfootbound
And you don’t know if it will slap or kill you
semperfi891
Ooh, very devilish.
semperfi891
Asking for a friend: are handjobs a thing?
Genriu
I mean there’s probably generators based on its orbit.
TwoCheese
I got one once so yes they are in fact a thing
semperfi891
LovesToSpooge517
If I could take a number of punches to my gut to save another from death, I might be willing to make that sacrifice
semperfi891
No sarcasm here, but I'm curious. Save any other person? Or just a subset of people?
LovesToSpooge517
If you said I have to take 5 full-intensity bare-knuckle punches to my gut, unblocked, to save any random 1 person from the Hand, I’m down.
cusbuster
What about if you knew who it was gonna be and they were an all round shit person.
LovesToSpooge517
And I had the choice to withhold their salvation? Definitely. I would definitely play God in that scenario and let them get theirs
LovesToSpooge517
No qualifications. I mean, I’d rather it not be like a pedophile I’m saving but I guess I’m not envisioning myself having any choice in this
semperfi891
That's fair. I think I'd find comfort in that. But I would also want that person to be notified of how close to death they came
LovesToSpooge517
Oh, absolutely
ThePunnyGuy
Animals.
semperfi891
They're exempt from The Hand
ThePunnyGuy
Good. Then I have no reason to save anything from it.
RabbitRevenge
if you manage to say...."give me a hand" before it crush's you.. it will let you live.
verukt89
I worked on a hardware store and I guy was facing away from me and trying to teach something. "Do you need a hand?" He turned and 1/2
verukt89
He only had one hand. The other was a claw. He said "Actually, I do!" We both laughed but I felt like a douche. 2/2
GeneralAnubis
But if you say it and you weren't the target, it crushes you instead
DingusMajoris
Or you have to beat it in Rock Paper Scissors.
INeedMoreGifMeMoreJustOneMore
"Didn't your mother tell you pointing is ru" is the current highscore held by a little girl in western Minnesota.
TotallyNotASnail
It's a hand, it can't hear you
SonOfKazar
Yeah. You gotta use sign language.
SimbaDidntKillMufasa
SimbaDidntKillMufasa
The sign
PervyAesSedai
It's a hand. It can't see your hands.
GrizzlyBeer26
It only responds to the secret handshake, which is incredibly difficult to perform, because you are smol, and it is lorj
Peachos
We've all seen Addams family enough to know it damn well can hear & see as an ambient hand
TheBunnyPants
Psst. Ambulatory! ;)
MstrES
Then, how does it find me?
CommentGuru
Echolocation via snapping.
NotTinyPancakes
Instinct
CommentGuru
Feelin'