schmetterschiss
91034
2064
170
Dec 3, 2020 1:18 PM
schmetterschiss
91034
2064
170
Quiet0ctopus
Grieve. Support each other. It is a horrible loss and I'm sorry. I hope you can heal together and look to the future.
DivorcedOfCourse
Fuck. That suck. I’m sorry.
CrimsonShortOne
1 in 4... thats how common it is. I promise it will get easier with time. But remember the love you have for that little thing
Stripeycatwithbigglasses
Sad, but sometimes it`s just a trial run. Better luck next time. Been there, went on to have two keepers.
CloakerJosh
Ah... fuck. I'm sorry, dude.
Welcometoyouredoom
My ex and I had a miscarriage. It was hard, it took a toll. But we kept trying for what we wanted and we have 2. Head up brother Stay strong
FrogPrinceLuckey
Suffered the same with our first pregnancy. It was devastating. But misery loves company and you are not alone.
FrogPrinceLuckey
It happens pretty regularly but no one is allowed to talk about it. Go to your friends and family and you will find commonality.
Snoopy101x
Bardcrest
sorry to hear that
BlastingRopeToWaluigiHentai
Shitty. Advice - she's gonna take it a LOT harder than you. And expect more in the future.
CapnsQuarters
Both my sister and SIL had miscarriages on their first pregnancies. They both now have several children. It's rough, but you'll pull through
Idonothaveaskullorbones
My heart goes out to you both.
discotheque42
Been there man. Here to talk if you want.
CrazyCatLad
Same, my wife miscarried about a year ago. She was 43 then. This July at 44, she gave birth to our son!
heyguysimtom
Being the partner is its own level of pain. You want to be supportive and helpful but you're also feeling it too. Im here to talk too
EMTsaidwhat
Thank you for reaching out like this. A lot of men aren't given the opportunity to talk and grieve during this process.
Snodogpete
Been there too - reach out if anyone needs
TallulahBumfluff
VirtualHugger
+1
TallulahBumfluff
Oooh I don't get to say it often but.... username checks out.
MisterTrashPanda
We have had two. It sucks man, I'm sorry. Best way I found to think of it was that it's the body's way of saying, "something is not 1/2
MisterTrashPanda
2/2 ...right here" and ending what may have turned out to be a very difficult life for the little one. It ain't perfect, but it helped me...
kermotherapy
That is exactly what it is. There was something seriously wrong and body cancelled the process to minimize the risks to the mother.
STGxDante
It happens alot that's why the dr. Doesn't even want to see you for a certain amount of time and why you should wait to announce it.
STGxDante
I never knew how scary and common this shit was until my ex became a nurse and going through family birth.
YoungBlood401
Dang. Be there for each other, it's a tough loss for both of you.
kansas80
I'm so sorry. I know first hand how much it hurts. ?
Retrikaethan
i know it's not much consolation but miscarriages in the first trimester are common.at that stage the body is still verifying the pregnancy-
Retrikaethan
won't have any problems and more often than not such miscarriages mean that the fetus had problems in one form or another/genetically.
Tyggna
We're with you OP, hang in there
Dranton12
Just went through this a month ago. All the best man. You’ll pull through.
iamthestigscanadiancousin
The baby is no more, but the love you have for him/her lives forever. Hold that in your heart.It gets better. You can guess how I know that.
LifeConfessionguy1
I'm sorry bro .. Virtual hug
rassingpedersen
I lost my boy at week 33.. reach out ude you need to talk.. i know your pain, brother.
iamlegendinjapan
I can't imagine that pain. Ours was 10 weeks and it was brutal.
rassingpedersen
Yea.. its been 6 years now.. still hurts, but you learn to cope. But caskets arent supposed to be that small..
wishIcouldthinkofsomething
Going back 4 generations in my maternal bloodline and myself included, we've list 50% of our pregnancies. I list two - and have two boys.
wishIcouldthinkofsomething
My mom lost 3- and got 3. My grandma lost 5- and had 5 children. Greatgrandma had twins but one died. So it's common but there is hope.
wishIcouldthinkofsomething
List means lost.
GrumpyOldMan55
I'm confused. Do I upvote a miscarriage?
Talldutchgirl
Yeah that is how I feel with posts like this. I think an upvote equals an ‘I support you’ and you help OP to the front page so yes
lichenit
Its upvoting the reaching out, good for him/her
Cargobiker530
Ob/Gyns really need to make sure women know how common this actually is so they understand it's not a personal failure. It's normal.
BlissfulAurora
As a woman who has had two early ones in 5 months, thank you, needed this.
Einbrecher
Logic goes out the window when your blood is chock full of all those wonderful pregnancy hormones. Wife recently gave birth to a 10 baby,
Einbrecher
our first, went in expecting not being able to breastfeed, pleasantly surprised she could, but was an emotional mess when it wasn't enough
Einbrecher
initially. She's a nurse, and no amount of logic or "it's a 10lb baby ffs" was able to quell the feeling that she had failed as a mother.
mydogisbetterthanyourdog
Yeah we are trying again after having one perfect babe &it’s been 3 months and I’m hating myself for it taking “so long” even though its not
Feralkyn
I may be tired but I'm staring at "a 10 baby" and just can't parse it at all
Einbrecher
10 lb...not sure how that bit got deleted, lol
Feralkyn
Oh... OUCH lol.
nilaismad
My husband was my lifesaver after all 3 of mine. Lean on each other and be patient. So sorry for your loss and pain :(
BlissfulAurora
Did you have a successful pregnancy eventually? Had my 2nd last month...
nilaismad
I have not yet, we haven't tried since our 3rd in Feb. We went to a specialist over the summer. We feel confident for next time. 1/2
nilaismad
Turns out I had tissue stuck from the 1st that had to be surgically removed. I am taking things for clotting and hormone regulation.
nilaismad
My sis in law has had 5. She has 2 amazing boys and reminds me it can happen!
Earthdancer
Same here!
bunny808
O11i3
I love this. What's the context behind it?
Scahri
I think they are friends cheering for the opposite Teams. Guy on the left chears his friend up as his Team is loosing
BeerCir
The Mets pitcher being hugged got injured, iirc it put him out for the season.
Varimothras
Couple sad people at a baseball game.
O11i3
Varimothras
BlastyMcBlastblast
it's more common than you'd think. talk to your friends or family about it, and don't loose hope :)
GreenAlienGoat
I lost my baby in October at 7 months. Time will hopefully heal our hearts. Be strong, you are not alone ❤️
whateverthevoicestellme
So much this! If pregnancy and healthcare generally weren’t considered a $$ liability, we wouldn’t have to suffer 1st trimester losses alone
EMTsaidwhat
I hate that this is true. The basic care for this isn't expensive, but it's no money maker so it's dismissed as non-necessary.
virtuacor
*lose
rhettrow
As I got older I was amazed at the # of women I knew that lost a pregnancy (often a first one) and went on to have successful pregnancies.
FierceKitty
I lost mine at 8 weeks. It will sting for a long time but it will get better!
EricPisch
It’s very common 10-15% but hardly ever gets discussed or raised as a problem
bouncebounceandtheclaw
It doesn’t make it any easier, but to reiterate what others stated, it is much more common than people let on but we’re talking about it now
bouncebounceandtheclaw
I’m sorry for your loss.
darkranger23
We found out almost all of our friends and family had a miscarriage after we had ours. I think this should be normalized in heath class.
TurangaLeelaIsMyMom
One of my biology teachers in HS did. He told us that miscarriage is FAR more common than we think, and that many women experience them >
TurangaLeelaIsMyMom
so early on they don’t even know it happened. They’re late for a period, and then they get it, and never even realize they were pregnant.
darkranger23
After lots of reading, my conclusion is that it only seems more common now because our pregnancy tests work earlier and earlier.
TurangaLeelaIsMyMom
Agreed. (Not that that in any way diminishes the grief of knowing they lost a child.)
Djinn000
Only 1/3 of pregnancies get to deliver
applemnki
Knowing this does nothing to ease the pain of the loss.
GoodGirlImgurian
I hated it when people said that to me after my miscarriage. I get the sentiment but it’s like saying you shouldn’t mourn someone’s 1/2
GoodGirlImgurian
2/2 death because everyone’s dies.
lichenit
I mean it does and doesn't, we had 3 before we were successful and it did help us knowing that it's more common than people know. But yeah
Netmonker
20% of pregnancy ends in miscarriage, 70% of miscarriage are concerning male foetus.
makeiteasykeepitsleazy
Really?! I’ve had 4 and I know 2 were male. I wonder why this is? Any link to info about that?
Netmonker
We have 3 good children and we experienced a miscarriage between 2th and third child. So keep up trying ! :)
tracereading
2nd
Quiet0ctopus
Be careful with "it happens more than you think," as it can seem to minimize the loss they're feeling.
lichenit
Agree, and I only say that after having 3, but everyone should have time to grieve, it's healthy but know it isnt over. 1 this week even.
dominiklapierre360
It alright that you mention it, i see you still want op care but sometime it can also help to be said that way. Just a matter of -
dominiklapierre360
Perspective from op, you and the other.
BlastyMcBlastblast
i'm not gatekeeping emotion, we all get that it sucks. i'm just saying it happens. a lot. and that it's nothing to be ashamed of
EMTsaidwhat
Talk to your family and friends, male ones too with children, because they may have experianced a similar thing, it's not discussed openly.
whateverthevoicestellme
In the US, you aren’t allowed any support because of cultural taboo. We hesitated to tell our friends but found out they all suffered too
BeardedCactusJack
My wife has worked on breaking the taboo. We've been through 2 miscarriages. Found out it's common as well. She started talking about it /1
BeardedCactusJack
on social media, and how nothing anyone said would really help, but there was no point in suffering alone. She needed to write down those /2
BeardedCactusJack
feelings. To vent and get it off her chest. She had responses from so many people who have gone through the same. It was really nice /3
heethin
Right on. It was astonishing to me to learn how common it is when we were going through it.
heyguysimtom
So many friends and family that had never mentioned it started talking to us about their experience
Omegarighteous
Worked in maternity, happens everyday, the crys of people is something that doesn't go away
CekinDestroy
I could imagine. My wife and I had the hardest time getting our first here, she got pregnant and we got so excited, and then miscarried...
CekinDestroy
Sorry, to clarify, tried so hard to get our first here, he's here and trying to a second. Got pregnant and then she miscarried. Still trying
mountainofpuppies
The rate of miscarriage is 1 in 5 and still high enough chance until 15-16 weeks
indyjones2010
1 in 5 pregnancies???
ButteryButtsButterflyCups
Yes. But usually during the first couple weeks. Chances get lower as it progresses, and after 12 weeks its very low
stolenmemepolice1
Most miscarriages happen during normal period cycle.
tryingtoohard
I had read 1/4 "Miscarriage is the spontaneous loss of a pregnancy before the 20th week. About 10 to 20 percent of known pregnancies 1/
tryingtoohard
end in miscarriage. But the actual number is likely higher because many miscarriages occur so early in pregnancy a woman doesn't realize 2/
tryingtoohard
she's pregnant" from the Mayo Clinic Website