talleyman
393201
20866
5454
This is my little girl, Elizabeth Brave. She was born at 18.5 weeks on Oct. 23rd. Today, March 23rd was supposed to be her due date. She's dressed in blue because we thought she was a boy until after the medical examination.
She lived for 15min after she was born. She had 10 fingers, 10 toes, all with finger and toenails. I wish I could have walked her down the aisle, held her when she was scared, took her to her first day of school, but I thank God for the 15min I had with her. Today's gonna be rough, but I wanted to share my little girl with you today, imgur, because she was beautiful and I never want her to be forgotten.
FP Edit: Thank you for all the supporting messages and comments. My wife and I greatly appreciate them more than you know.
To those who have attempted to shame/guilt me or have expressed disgust; I forgive your ignorance. I pray you never have to go through this. This is my baby and these are the only pictures I have of her. I imagine that if she were to have looked more "normal" then the response wouldn't have been so negative, but the only reason she's so red is because she hadn't developed any fat. She's a baby just like any other but a little less developed. Watch your words because they stab worse than any sword.
FP Edit Edit: Man, who knew you could feel so much love from a bunch of strangers on the internet. Hold your babies tight today and get them some ice-cream. I thank you all from the deepest places of my heart for the kind messages and comments and for getting rid of the hateful garbage that was in the comments section. Y'all are pretty awesome.
dwrst11
As fathers, this is what we all fear for the rest of our lives: that we will outlive our children no matter how long that may be. I'm sorry.
FredOak3
Be there for each other. Get help if you need it. Heartbreaking
Showhermyoface
As the father of two - I cannot imagine. My condolences.
cenataur
Hang in there fella, I hope your missus is ok too. Cherish those 15 mins and stay strong.
bluefell
I lost my 1st daughter after 15 days. Time does heal the loss and the sorrow you feel. It's been 29 years tomorrow that we lost her...
ILike2TouchButts
Check out the organisation www.sayinggoodbye.org they really helped my friend through her angel. @op
ILike2TouchButts
https://www.sayinggoodbye.org/
AstrophysicsDork
This breaks my heart, friend. As a father - this saddens me beyond words :'-( and maybe we can all value life a bit more. Sending love, bro
JosephVissarionovichStalin
My birthday is October 23rd... I'll light an extra candle this year for her.
michellebrwn1019
Youre AWESOME!
SteelAce
Been a long time lurker here on imgur but after seeing this post I had to sign up to comment. I teared up so much . Sorry for your loss
Webelos8
"supposed" to be a dad? You are a dad.
EWW3
I agree–you're a dad. Celebrate Mother's Day and Father's Day. You took care of her for the time you were allowed. "Thank you, daddy"
Scott2755
We lost our first child at Twenty-three weeks. His name was Jesse. Life is precious and fleeting.
singingturtles113
I'm sorry, friend. *virtual hug*
Scott2755
It was a very long time ago but really you never forget. But you move on.
ChamberDanger
iwnnagohgher
My mother had 10 miscarriages, and I was born at 23 weeks. I can only imagine your pain. Stay strong. You are an amazing father!
HalfPintKatie
Wow!!! 23 weeks!! You're a miracle! So don't do drugs! ???? you're here for a reason
divideandconquer
Kinda sounds like something tried telling her it wasn't supposed to be, but good for her.
Luvvie
I have a friend who has a similar story. Her mom named her Heaven because she was her mom's miracle from heaven
VaguelySatisfying
Fuck the downvote fairy. Your friend's existence is worth neutral points at least!
ThisIsNoCave
That's fucking awful, OP. I'm sorry this happened to you and her mom. I hope you're blessed with a child that you can love and raise.
Cacapeepeepoopoo
Are there really people out there talking shit?!??!?!
[deleted]
[deleted]
whatdoesdonkeylike
Cunt I bet your face looks worse than that.
JustSoObvious
.
johnsza
I don't understand why this is such a negative comment...?
[deleted]
[deleted]
johnsza
Yes. Context please!
sulfuratus
For everyone wondering why this dot is getting downvoted, you need to know that it means that the user has the intention to return to 1/2
sulfuratus
this comment at a later time for some reason. Since nobody can discover said reason here, it's getting downvoted. 2/2
muffvanquisher
Looks like his username is not so relevant eh?
mthedoor
I read it as "I am putting this dot here so that when you DO have a healthy kiddo, I'll hear about it"
TurtBurglar
Me too, but that wouldn't really make sense, right? I'm really curious as to why they dotted this.
Quilliam1124
johnsza
Why was the dot bad?
ADoggoIsABigOlPupper
Isn't it JustSoObvious
thewhifflingtit
It wasn't, really. I guess some people thought it was out of place.
daltonlmn
A lot of people put the dot on sexual posts. Maybe they thought it was a tasteless joke
zipfel73m
how's her mom?
jizanthipussss
Sorry Mom & Dad, I wish you guys the best. From your words, you seem strong and I'm certain you're supportive as well.
talleyman
She's doing well. Physically she healed very quickly, but mentally it took her a while to grieve and today has brought a lot of that back.
zipfel73m
i wish you two all the strength an love it takes to get through this together. can't possibly imagine how it feels.
1101base2
I would imagine for both of you the time after this was very rough and is still today found with rough days ;_(
pauldegraaf
Be strong and keep talking.
inneedofcoffeeasap
Im so sorry for both of your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you both and your daughter will be watching over the both of you ❤
iswim
All my love to you and your wife, OP. From Perth, Western Australia. You are a Dad! And always will be. RIP your sweet little baby ~Hugs~
mallywanders
I once thought I'd had a miscarriage. (Very late period, odd tissue in it) it takes a long time to get over even if it was a false alarm.
iswim
Look, I've had a miscarriage myself. But I don't think it's OK to compare a heavy "odd" period to OP losing a once living baby. Insensitive.
lovelake
personally I feel like rather than 'comparing' she was making a point that even a false alarm can be heartbreaking and an actual -->
lovelake
miscarriage is by far amplified above that. If it takes a long time to get over a false alarm, they must know that an actual miscarriage -->
jessyta
The anniversaries are the hardest for me. The day I lost them, their due date and 10 years later Mother's Day still fucking sucks.
jessyta
The anniversaries are the hardest for me. The day I lost them, their due date and 10 years later Mother's Day still fucking sucks.
PetuniasFromMagrathea
ShadowLightning9510
Mayi know the sauce please?
mongoosebeep
That's Game of Thrones. Season 1 I believe.
Samefag
Game of Thrones, scene where Arya has to basically say bye to her Direwolf due to reasons I'm not gonna spoil.
TheRealJuggernaut
You need more but this is all i can send
keeshi
I have pictures of me holding my son when he was born early and didn't make it. It's hard. But you'll get through it.
yabin400
Pics?
[deleted]
[deleted]
yabin400
Nate the gay
ladyface
Lol!
Corgibuttnubs
I lost my son at 22 weeks. You are a father and always will be. I am so sorry for your loss. I am here if you need to talk.
brimnac
22 Weeks, CMV. It's an extremely common cause of stillbirth. https://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/25/health/cmv-cytomegalovirus-pregnancy.html
Nationalcutie
Sending lots of hugs
NaivePulp
This really goes to show the ups and downs of imgur. We can all stop for a second to support someone, even a dad with a UN of corgibuttnubs
QueenLinnOfTheNorth
I lost my baby girl at 23 weeks. I have a son now who I love above all else but I think about her daily.
PotooGeatAndWise
17 weeks. Molar pregnancy. We are trying again.
NotTodayNotYesterday
Just make sure both parties are ready for that.
Staticmango
I had a molar pregnancy too but they managed to catch it at 4 weeks, made me very ill
Pawnderlust
That's really far along for a molar pregnancy! I hope you are ok.
Corgibuttnubs
I had a molar pregnancy too. They found it at 9 weeks. After a total of 6 losses we finally had a healthy boy in 2015. Don't give up hope.
iknewyousobrieflyyoudeadsoapdog
I adopted a year and a half ago after a miscarriage and immediately got pregnant like 5 minutes later. It was the best thing to ever happen
Nanaashi
Congrats on your baby boy. Out of curiosity and respect, why did t you try adoption after a few failed attempts? No rudeness intended!
Corgibuttnubs
We pursued it and still are. But I really wanted to be pregnant and have a child.
mallywanders
I commend you on your efforts, both with adopting and having a child of your own. It feels so unfair to me that I'm carrying a baby while
CanIGetAnUpvotePrettyPlease
If you don't mind me asking (we are trying to get pregnant) is there any particular reason son was lost at 22 weeks? Any info is appreciated
Corgibuttnubs
Incompetent cervix. I went into labor that they couldn't stop. The pregnancy that was successful envolved stitches in cervix and bed rest.
mallywanders
This is unrelated to miscarriage, but rather advice for conceiving. Regular sex improves sperm count and ensures that available sperm are
mallywanders
Newer, more mobile, and more chromosomally normal. Having sex at least once every other day will greatly improve your chances.
CanIGetAnUpvotePrettyPlease
Thanks for the tip. I am kinda worried because I used to be (recently quit) a heavy pot smoker. So I'm hoping that won't cause any issues !
vhorner
I wouldn't worry much. My fiancé and I smoke weed moderately often and got pregnant despite iud, but baby didn't make it past extraction. :(
mallywanders
Unfortunately I don't know much about how that will impact you. Neither my husband nor I has had anything stronger than caffeine.
DoyDoyDoyDoy
regular everyday potsmoker for the past 11 years here, wife is at 26 weeks. hey, if snoop dogg can have kids, so can you.
SkittleBot
I feel like it's so rare to hear how fathers cope after something like this. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Corgibuttnubs
It's not fair that men aren't allowed to mourn like women. FYI October 15 is International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.
BaronvonSimian
A random comment from a complete stranger probably on the other side of the world but I want to send you a ton of sincere & heartfelt love
BlackDragoness
To Emily Brave. Wind to thy wings, little sister.
RagingSlab
'I forgive your ignorance'. You are the better man, OP. Thoughts and prayers from mine to yours.
ladyface
I don't think it's ignorance. I think it's the disturbing photo of the dead baby.
CyborgScribe
No, that line is why I didn't upvote him. We don't need that passive agressive arrogant bullshit. He suffered a loss so he wont...
ladyface
That's harsh, but something off about posting a photo of a discolored, dead baby and expecting strangers to be supportive.
Iwannabekawaii
Well the majority don't seem to agree with you on that
baconsmellsreallygood
To be fair it is probably split. You just don't see it bc its buried under bad comment section
Iwannabekawaii
Actually no I've read almost all the comments I saw the post before it ever hit front page
CyborgScribe
...get downvotes from me but that wasn't cool. Anyone else I would downvote for that snarky proud tone.
StateOfPlague
Dude you're literally as hypocritical as it gets. You're the reason he wrote that.
Ilikeyogurt
That's not passive aggressiveness man, that's pain and well managed rage. Don't talk shit about other ppl's kids, otherwise you're garbage.
mdmk7000
Time and a place dude. Vent somewhere else cause right here right now this ain't it.
CanadianOneDollarCoin
Seeing things like this helps me keep my life and problems in perspective . Oh my 10 yr old didn't put his dishes away? A customer ......
CanadianOneDollarCoin
....yelled at me? Who cares. Don't sweat the small stuff. People are dealing with some hardcore shit day to day. All the best OP. Take care
CantStopAddictedToTheShindig
Yup. Had a hard day at work today but you know what, tomorrow is my son's birthday and I'm leaving work early to make him a cake. My (1/2)
CantStopAddictedToTheShindig
work problems can wait and my boss will be fine without me today, I'm not gonna let anything get me down. I have too much to be grateful for
MittensPlease
Yes, it's a virtue to be grateful for your struggles because somebody out there could have a burden greater than you can imagine. Bless
IMissedTheJoke
I understand what you are saying and completely agree with it. However it's like saying you can't be happy because some else is happier.
MittensPlease
I'm not saying that at all. It should give you some solace that's all, not guilt.
BlindyBlindMansSonnySon
As heart breaking as this post is, I agree with you, all things are relative to your own situation.
HellsBelly
But maybe it can make you realize that things aren't as bad as you make it out to be
ohmyapplepie
"I wish I could have...held her when she was scared" In a way, you did. You provided comfort through her entire life.
VaguelySatisfying
Stop cutting onions. Jesus, it's heartbreaking to think of, but you're right.
Tanthian
This is the comment that destroyed me.
SaintMaceToTheFace
Yes
zhukoz
I hope @OP takes this comment to heart...spot on.
dothesnozberriestastelikesnozberries
This is actually amazingly beautiful. :'(
zhukoz
I hope @OP takes this comment to heart...spot on.
DangMeat
I hope the mum is healthy and well.
atsomepointidid
This. Hug her for us?
mormacil
I don't think she's well but I hope she's healthy.
Satherian
The sad truth
DefinitelyNotAdolfHitler
Off of the generally obligatory "soo.... she single?" That imgur usually ironically generates here, THIS. 100x this. I hope you two are well
JippyBergeron
.
squatlow17
I hope mom is okay. She's going to need you a lot. Give her lots of cuddles ans hugs. Prayers for the 3 of you.
sill
Its just as important that Dad is looked after. My husband took our daughters death worse than I did.
tenebrisangelus
She must be hurting too.
CanIjustchangethislater
My parents' 1st only lived for a few days. She wouldve been 30 & even now they say they have 4 daughters, not 3. I think it helps her to 1/2
CanIjustchangethislater
(2/2) tell people and not try to hide it or let herself feel diminished by it.
Courtzo
I have 3 siblings that didn't make it. It doesn't get easier
thelastamericano
Almost cried on the bus.
Thisismyusernameforimgurstuff
When my friends lost their sweet Ezra at 18 weeks I sent her a little bracelet with an E on it. Your wife may like something like that.
KanyeShruggin
Yes. When I had my miscarriage my obgyn told me I should get the birthstone of the month I lost my baby... Something to remember him by.
Thisismyusernameforimgurstuff
PS. With a cerclage they went on to have a beautiful baby girl who is about to turn 1!
Thisbefluff
TIL what cerclage is. Very interesting
Thisbefluff
Is there anyway to know/ask beforehand if that's something you may need?
Thisismyusernameforimgurstuff
It's been said to never shy away from a loving gesture or " how are you doing?" because they're probably already thinking of him/her.
Thisismyusernameforimgurstuff
I'm sorry. I misunderstood what you were asking. Yes! A diagnoses of incompetent cervix.
Thisbefluff
Thank you, we may try and start a family in a bit and I'm trying to get an idea for what to ask
Thisismyusernameforimgurstuff
In some ways it legitimizes their pain. "I see you are hurting and I'm hurting with you and thinking of you". That loss was REAL.
MrsSlavicHorse
This. Please take care of her.
[deleted]
[deleted]
PoliticalAutisticScreeching
Haven't seen that many downvotes on a comment for a while
Qaetan
Ya know, I understand grief can be met with humor, but that is just a tasteless remark.
BrianDeBrain
The comment was deleted. What did it say? I understand if it was too awful to repeat, but I'm curious.
largeal
it said, send nudes
BrianDeBrain
Well that is pretty fucked up.
Adr1n
Fuck off dude.
ThatOneGuyWhoDoesntGetTheJoke
What did he say?
[deleted]
[deleted]
Qaetan
It's disappointing to see that nothing remains inviolate on the internet.
fewe
fuck you lassann
ThatOneGuyWhoDoesntGetTheJoke
What did he say (fuck lassann)
fewe
"technically still milf nudes"
SadHedgehog
There's something very wrong with you two.
largeal
what did he say?
SadHedgehog
The worst things :(
flatearthscientologist
I mean, it is lassann.
SadHedgehog
Perhaps... Still, doesn't mean it shouldn't be said.
iwanttoeatpie
I'm 15 weeks pregnant and I feel like my body has a very tenuous grasp on the baby. You've lived my greatest fear. My heart bleeds for you.
Iwannabekawaii
Agreed I'm 7 weeks and my boyfriends mother had a stillbirth 4 months ago. I'm terrified.I always thought this would be one of the fun part
iwanttoeatpie
It's absolutely hard, especially at the beginning. I don't think it's fun until you can feel the baby move. That's when I can relax a little
Iwannabekawaii
But really it's the most worrisome
tat2edVillain
Long time lurker, first time posting. My wife and I lost our daughter Paloma @ 39 weeks gestation. Worst fucking feeling ever. Don't stop
iknewyousobrieflyyoudeadsoapdog
Oh that truly breaks my heart. Have you had any successful pregnancies since?
tat2edVillain
Yes we now have 2 beautiful children.
glitterspoutingwhale
39 weeks! That must have been so hard on you both. I'm so sorry.
tat2edVillain
8 years later we still celebrate her birthday.
QuincyEndicott
A lot better than a suicide at 28 years.
tat2edVillain
Wasn't measuring dicks, just trying to help a fellow imgurian with their sorrow.
toddii
Don't compare grief, any loss of a loved one is a tragic and hard experience no matter who or when.
QuincyEndicott
I have to disagree, with all due respect, it can get worse. We sell ourselves on the idea of relativity of pain as a comfort to our egos
LadyCottonHead
But.. What, it's supposed to make the dude you replied to feel better? 'Well that pain is worse, so... Buck up, mate.' I mean, really?
FrancoUnAmerican
Ohhh man, i'm so, so sorry :( My wife lost 6 babies, but never that late. I could not even try to feel what you lived that day. :(
ChaochrisG
I'm so sorry for your loss that must have been hard
FrancoUnAmerican
It's worst for my wife... I need to be her rock so she can go through it :). Still it's not easy at all.
ihaveashibashit
I can't even imagine the pain of dealing with that kind of loss 6 times. I'm very sorry and hope you and your wife are well.
StateOfPlague
If I may ask a personal question, do you have any other kids? I'm just curious, putting herself through that so many times shows (1/2)
StateOfPlague
how much she wanted kids and how great of a mom she would be. You're amazing for helping her through every one of them, that's for sure.
FrancoUnAmerican
No, we don't have any. I'm 36 and she's 34 we've not given hope yet but I'm not desillusionnal either. We'll won't stop yet.
titswaggle
Don't give up! Consider all your options. You deserve to be parents :)
heywhatsgoingonoverhere
My wife&I lost 4 (1 at 12 weeks,twins at 17 &the twin of our now 4month old).It doesn't get easier,but at least the nightmares have stopped.
VaguelySatisfying
As titswaggle said, you deserve to be parents and some lucky kids deserve to have you, whether they're yours by blood or not :)
faithfuldoubt
This guy just lost some big hopes and dreams and all imgur can think about is "Omg I'm so grossed out!!" Grow a pair, imgur.
EvilLesbian
While I understand and respect his loss, I wasn't expecting images of a deceased child on the front page.
VaguelySatisfying
Honestly, I do think Imgur needs some sort of content warning option that can be turned on or off by the user.
TheAnswerWasAlwaysMoreLube
Are you seeing the same comment field as I am?
Lilshadow48
Ya'know I just don't go to imgur to see dead babies. Maybe that's your thing, I'm not judging, but it's not for me.
VaguelySatisfying
It's not what I really expected to see today either. Not knocking OP at all, just wish Imgur would add a content warning option for users.
MemeDissector
All i can think of is how premature babies look like ayyy lmaos
Tikityler
I was really pissed to find out there was a need for his long edit start with "To those"
VACWavesMoreOftenPlz
I'm not saying I nessasaraly agree with the logic, but most people do feel bad for him, just don't really want pics of the baby......
kahdri
Totally fair. But there's no need to leave comments to make OP's time *worse* when you can simply hit next or step away from the computer.
faithfuldoubt
Emotional needs of parent with deceased child > collective discomfort of imgurians who don't like gross pictures
VaguelySatisfying
Even then, the people calling her "gross" for simply being less developed than they're used to seeing are the real disgusting ones.
CantStopAddictedToTheShindig
Imgur puts up some gnarly pics or poorly treated dogs that are so bad they make me literally look away and they have a problem with this?
VACWavesMoreOftenPlz
Hey, I'm just saying what I see other people saying. I never said I agreed with it.
tlm26071
Dead children are more taboo in society than abused animals.
Tyrano73
None of us want that here
elizabethwantstosee
I didn't downvote you, but I def disagree with you. I think the photos are fascinating and beautiful .
BlandNotBoring
Seems like a lot of sincerely supportive people don't mind it.
Tyrano73
Try tumblr then, it's really better for those kind of posts. You know, the not funny part
BlandNotBoring
Try a proctologist then, to help you get your head out of your ass. This site is for all sorts of things.
Tyrano73
Allright I understand. I'll make sure to post here as soon as someone around me dies so we'll enjoy that together
SaintMaceToTheFace
Speak for yourself cunt
MemeDissector
you want dead babies on frontpage?
Tyrano73
It even makes you aggressive :)
twoplankjesus
This isn't Reddit.
twoplankjesus
Seems like I've hit a nerve haha
faithfuldoubt
Don't give them a chance to downvote you twice
reesareesa
There's a story category, you twat. If you don't like it, don't brows in usersub...
twoplankjesus
I'm not in usersub, cunt. Go read what twistedupinsidemymind said above. Plus there isnt even a nsfw marking, seriously?
CyborgScribe
Umm...this is first item FP currently, dude.
BasicallyJesus
Its not that its gross, its how inappropriate it is. His kid dies and his first reaction is to post its corpse on imgur. Fucked priorities
CyborgScribe
I agree with you...sorta. Because people are fucked up so he could be fishing for upvotes, sick as that sounds. That said...
CyborgScribe
...giving him them don't do anything bad for us. If he isn't lying he could use the support.
HisNamEisMYnamEtOO93
I bet if that same pic was used fir some stupid meme with jokes on it you wouldn't mind
SaintMaceToTheFace
No they would t
SaintMaceToTheFace
Wouldn't
HisNamEisMYnamEtOO93
Yes they would
baileykz
It's called empathy. You should try it
[deleted]
[deleted]
megapow
Photos at funerals aren't uncommon in some places in the WOD.
megapow
World*
Chewbaccabra
Please do some weekend at bernies shit
3toedsloth
I don't think there is any issues with sharing pictures of loved ones. I've seen quite a few coffin shots on here. Death is a part of living
brojustshowmeyourdickbro
This guy is going through an extremely traumatic moment and wants to reach out to his community for support. He's not posting for FB asshole
TheyMayBeFakeButTheyreGrrrrreat
Hope your genitals rot off.
[deleted]
[deleted]
BasicallyJesus
You're right, my pointing out how inappropriate it is to post a picture of a dead child definitely warrants my own child dying. Cheers!
divideandconquer
Saying people deserve dead children. What a nice and measured response.....
BlandNotBoring
He's allowed to be a proud daddy just like anyone else. It's months later.
RosegoldEverything
It's been five months. It's the date she should have been born. Some people need to share and get support and let her not be forgotten.
legitchrispratt
On Facebook. To friends and family. Not a community of memelords who will comment utter atrocities. It's asking for abuse.
RosegoldEverything
Sometimes people need the anonymity. Facebook is full of friends, family, acquaintances who'll be all up in your business after the fact.
legitchrispratt
And these are the consequences of sharing grief. That's why most of us learn to bottle that shit up until we trust people.
BlandNotBoring
Just because some of yall are dick cheese doesn't mean many of us aren't good people.
Fumbledpersonality
Idc how many downvotes you get for this, thank you. I hate he's going through that but come one. This isn't the place.
Fumbledpersonality
Come on*
Krakraalldayday
you're a father and she will always be your first born, keep every memory in your heart no matter how short your time with her was
baranh
Great response for the post !
TimberLacoda
Your journey as a add started the day your baby girl was conceived, she may have only been out the womb for 15 mins. But she we will
ILike2TouchButts
https://www.sayinggoodbye.org/ I also want to make sure people who also have suffered a loss of a baby know this website exists.
cheekymarmoset
This is so important!
ILike2TouchButts
Thanks for your support. The people that run this organisation are truly amazing. So much compassion love and support.
BurdenedWithAGloriousPorpoise
TimberLacoda
Always be in your heart for the rest of your time, you are a DAD, congrats on a beautiful baby girl. Follow her in dreams.
rockgolf
If you haven't named her yet, do so. And don't give it to your next daughter.
dadudemon
Love you. You're a good person.
Trise
Your Daughter is beautiful. Thank you for sharing her with me. You are a good father for this.
DanielZarz4
fuck you, dont lie to be polite, what he did its exploiting his grieve for sympathy ? wtf its wrong with the world!
Trise
I'm pretty sure you're what's wrong, sensitive little snowflake. Fuck off and let him share his story.
Trise
Dude, I enjoyed the post. People all grieve differently. If his process is sharing that she existed I support it.
ChristopherLomas
I've never read more truer words than I have right now
doihearanamen
Amen to this.
TimberLacoda
No one can ever say you are not a father you are and f2ffoing a great job so far, live on for her.
BholaBalak
Why is the hat so small ?
buytwogetonefree
I wasn't expecting this. I almost spit my mountain dew all over my keyboard
toothlvr
Usually hospitals with NICUs have volunteers that make tiny hats for the preemies born there. It's probably big enough for a 24 or 25 1/2
toothlvr
Week baby which would have a "pretty good" chance of surviving
xDerfelCadarn
I'm not sure that is a good a idea. He will only recall sadness.
Smallpox
What's with the "first born" thingy? All children are equal.
MrsVhinnnn
It's a special bond. You "grow up" with your first, become a parent and another level of adult. You have different experiences with them
Smallpox
That's just discrimination. All kids should be treated 100% equally.
QuazMasta
Agreed, but I think the point here is "She will always be counted among your children", even if other people don't see it that way.
redvald
You should just.... You know, shut the fck up.
yakiudon
Yeah! People should only say things we agree with! This open exchange of ideas, questions, and differing opinions is repugnant.
pinkahboo
redvald
Well you can say whatever you want, but don't be a dick to a man who just lost a child.
fiercy
This is the so very true. Your family is in my heart.
mediaman73
As one Dad, to another, I'm so sorry for your loss.
talleyman
The hospital was awesome and gave us a memory box. We're going to plant a garden at her grave today. Thanks for the support kind stranger
RealCaptChicken
upvotehypnotoad
Seriously, fk any1 trying to shame you. She will always be your daughter and should be treated as such. This is a beautiful memorial, OP.
Pnkfaerie
Our memory box is on our shelf in the bedroom, next to his urn. PM me if you need to talk to someone. I lost my first too.
Dontknowwhattocallmyselfsothisisit
We planted a tree in our yard because we weren't able to plant anything at the gravesite.
tomhiddlestonsthirdtesticlewhyyesyoucantouchmeallyouwant
She was beautiful. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
wowter
Unfortunatly we can relate. Our Sophie was born at 23 weeks. Elizabeth will have a friend to play with.
wowter
Take lots of pictures now so you'll have something for the future
ireallyreallylovecheetos
This was last October
ReluctantSquirrel
Stay strong man! That's just horrible. I would wish that on no one.
QuamvisSintSubAqua
Wish you all the best.
FlyingButtPliers
http://imgur.com/t/miscarriage this is an awful tag but you can find plenty of others to talk with on these other posts if you need to.
LordSnow2211
https://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/06/12/636013695864776686-88003938_6360136516344696701037032874_tumblr_mlujkbIDKc1rkeum5o8_250.gif
LordSnow2211
My thoughts are with you, man. You are the best father and you comforted and loved your child. I know that u & ur wife will get through this
DanielZarz4
Respect for the dead, thats all i can say, he/she deserves to rest in peace, but no; now the internet have the dead photos for ever
nodisco
So sorry for you and mom. Embrace what happened for what it was. Talk about her, smile and cry for her. Don't keep it inside. Best wishes
cheekymarmoset
Please, get grief counseling for you and your wife/gf. My brother and his ex did not and it destroyed their relationship and she turned
cheekymarmoset
to alcohol to cope. He didn't do any better, even though he IS doing better now.
itsybitsyspider
This! I've seen people just go completely insane from losing a baby. I've seen some even go as far as to neglect other children they have
cheekymarmoset
The worst part is that she is still in denial that she needs counseling. It will be 5 years in August and she is at the bars every single>>
michealikruhara0110
She was born at 4.5 months, literally half how long a pregnancy is supposed to last. I didn't even realize that was possible. Fuck.
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Varzoth
Sometimes shit just goes wrong, quite often in fact between 10 and 45%, risk incresing with older mothers.
PeregrinusII
You didn't realize pregnancy complications were possible?
zhukoz
Bit fucking harsh, mate, under the circumstances.
PeregrinusII
Yeah, I didn't see the previous post. I thought they were referencing another comment, not a personal experience. My giant fucking mistake.
zhukoz
No worries :)
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TheDouche
Came here to post months. Nobody counts time in weeks.
Luvvie
You count months after like 20 weeks post-birth...
bucketmouse
OBGYNs and Labor and Delivery nurses do.
ladybird2223
Almost everybody I know that is/has been pregnant measured it in weeks. That is a more accurate track of development than months.
jessyta
My babies were born at 19 weeks. One was stillborn, the other lived about 5 minutes.
gogetahaircutyadamnhippie
So so sorry. Hugs.
TurboStonr
I'm so sorry :(
MaidsHeardTheGoblinsCry
I am very sorry that that happened to you.
VeryMoistTowelettes
:(
Webelos8
I'm sorry for your loss.
Pwningpikachu
Fucking hell :(
itsybitsyspider
And this is why I am almost afraid to have children. I don't know how I'd handle going through something like this.
JanetVanDyne
I was born prematurely today, but not as premature as this baby...
TommyWa
Yeah, I was born at 27 weeks as a twin, neither my brother's lungs or mine functioned at all during birth and both of us turned out (1/2)
TommyWa
relatively fine,my brother is able to run something like a 5:20mile and I'm reasonably healthy.Health sci is only going to get better(2/2)
JanetVanDyne
I'm happy for you. Science has gone far.
zhukoz
Wow, I was lucky then born at 26 weeks to a 44yo mum, in 1967. No NICU, just a humidicrib, and no parental visits. Many premature babies in
JanetVanDyne
Well, today 17 years ago.
aeonicentity
I was about to say, they're giving anyone imgur accounts these days...
slinkhi
perhaps gives someone out there some perspective about late term abortions..
Ihazcheeseburger
Late term? 18 weeks is still fairly early crazily enough.
Uhmcaitlin
Dude, not the time or place to push your political agenda. Have some class and tact.
SuperFancyCatWhoJustWantsToBeLoved
Your an ass
VaguelySatisfying
*You're. Insults are a bit more effective when well written.
Uhmcaitlin
And almost ALWAYS in late term abortions, that child is wanted more than anything, but it is an issue of medical safety.
Ihazcheeseburger
So then what's the big deal with changing "almost" to "always?" Plus this sadly wouldn't even be close to being considered late term.
Ihazcheeseburger
So then what's the big deal with changing "almost" to "always?"
Wombatish
Because it reduces access. You have people disagreeing about degrees of 'awful enough' and fearing legal reprecussions should they come *c*
Wombatish
*c* down on the 'wrong' side of the line - as determined in hindsight. Canada doesn't have such laws and a woman still had problems *c*
Wombatish
Or suffering. Delivery, especially with certain complications, is traumatic to both mom and fetus.
Uhmcaitlin
Exactly
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thewhifflingtit
There are no late abortions that aren't medically necessary.
VIAI
There are indeed, at least here in Canada.
Wombatish
I'm sure you have proof of this, outside of it being theoretically possible.
VIAI
This is Imgur, not a scholarly debate. Google it. I'm too lazy to but I know it's there. I live there after all.
littlebirdiesdirtyfeet
People who have abortions at 18 weeks, in the vast majority of cases, want that baby more than anything.
littlebirdiesdirtyfeet
I can't imagine having to make that decision.
GRiMGRiZ
which almost never happen, so good job being irrelevant i guess?
TrebleNightingale
This wasn't a case of an abortion. It was a severely premature birth, dumping that accusation onto someone who didn't want this (pt. 1)
VIAI
I'm aware this isn't an abortion. I'm using this and alluding to another topic.
TrebleNightingale
Alright, that's very understandable, and I will commend you for that. But this post isn't a very appropriate place to make that allusion on.
TrebleNightingale
to happen is very cruel to do. I don't agree with people who get abortions at all, but it is still saddening to se this forced onto (pt. 2)
TrebleNightingale
Other people. Even if it had been an abortion, they didn't want to lose this baby. They're heartbroken accusations pour salt on the wound.
ifuckinglovesloths
Late abortions only happen when it is dangerous to the mothers life, or the baby is not going to survive. Fuck off and read a book.
VIAI
Yeah you got rekt by another user in the first reply. Might want to read a book yourself moron.
jhaneb
That depends where you live... legal at any point in the pregnancy in Canada
jhaneb
Stating a fact, not taking a side. Didn't realize that straight facts get downvoted now...
VIAI
Welcome to Imgur and it's insanely left community.
zeroxstar
Do you really fucking think a woman wakes up in her 8th month and is just "eh, im not feeling this anymore. Abortion time!"? Fuck off.
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VIAI
Another tolerant Liberal telling me to that "fuck off" is an argument. Yes here in Canada you can get an abortion right up before birth.
Eneficus
So a mother waits months and thinks oh no I jav3 a baby maybe I'll just get an abortion on the day before my labor. No, it's almost purely
VIAI
I'm not explaining individual's thinking I'm talking about the law of the land. Separate the 2.
Eneficus
Med8cal if they get an abo4tion in the last trimester
Wombatish
http://news.nationalpost.com/full-comment/letters/todays-letters-late-trimester-abortions-are-not-happening-in-canada-without-a-reason
KatKetamine
Thank you. I was like what the hell, we don't do late term abortions
Nuntius
You don't have to be a liberal to respect a woman's right not to die in labor.
VIAI
That's not even what I'm talking about. I'm talking about optional abortions not medically necessary ones.