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Apr 23, 2017 9:19 AM
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ARoomFullOfBears
Hey! You leave middle earth out of this!
YerAGrizzardArry
C'mon mate, everyone knows they're both Australia.
GarHar44
Oi you fuck! Don't sell us out!!!
nafun
Given the tendency of NK missiles to blow up on the launch pad, I wouldn't be afraid unless they start building their missiles in Sydney.
QuackSparrow
Bloody Aussies
TheSaltyCaptain
Why, though? New Zealand is awesome.
JacksBrokenWind
Got me Winnie Blues! Got me chisel!
laubeth
I heard you exhaled once
Sauroctonus
Can North Korea afford to fire that far?
Fargus57
They could if they buy their rocket fuel at Costco. 20% cheaper than at the local fuel depot. Cheaper warheads too if you buy in bulk.
JDM4371
They can barely hit an Ocean. No worries Mates.
TheDumpGuy
In before all the Americans start saying "Oi" and "Cunt" pretending they are Australian.
lucienishisnameo
Oi cunt ! Murcia here!
TimberGod
This map is upside-down...
poopybuttmcfartface
Maaaaaaate... yer dreamin'
ghostchips12345
*shakes head * Aussies
BewareTheCrocigator
No surprises there
Lemonwithsalt
Hey! New Zealand is my way out off the political BS and possible war. I woul like it to not be a target.
yourfaceisawesome
Yeah, leave us alone you peasants!
Nessuss
Oi.
WaffleCopters
Cunt.
HeartOfMedusa
Fuck off.
KyleButNotThatKyle
Awe, your Aussie/Kiwi rivalry is adorable.
Dankdawg69
Fuck off cunt
MidlandRedux
Isn't one of these Middle Earth and the other a post-apocalyptic hell-hole? I get them confused.
IPostRandomComments
I've trained with some Aussies, bastards don't fuck around! NK would be fucked!
Farroutm8
It's alright. They don't have the range to hit NZ so if they try, you will get hit anyway. NZ win every time!
PianoMan2112
NZ is stick
Farroutm8
And stick win every time
PianoMan2112
Break New Zealand in half, have 2 Newer Zealands.
chrishallett83
Get the fuck out of here, @OP. If NK threatens New Zealand we'll turn the whole country to scorched earth. NOBODY fucks with NZ but us.
MakeMeOneWithEverything
Damn right.
OldRuffian
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood, not even me.
BewareTheCrocigator
Like the big brother that fights off the bullies then beats you up himself
ProfessorDumbass
Aussie Aussie Aussie...haka haka haka
reid2048
What does haka mean ?
SleepyFaraday
The haka is a Maori war dance
reid2048
Thanks
ToastedVanilla
Jesus Christ this comment section. I can hear your accents.
JohnSmithterms
I read yours in aussie too haha
BewareTheCrocigator
Now hear them from kids: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqRVqXMyzhM
escalinci
Most Australians do not have very strong accents. Maybe it comes out in the fingers.
fullofwastedpotential
It's a beaut
stardame
I know!!! And I fucking LOVE it!
MrCannibal
Fuck ye
AlarkonysArt
I had an ex from NZ, gotta say her accent was ridiculous compared to texas accents.
midd1eearth
Yay texas! ... and new zealand!
IAkuTheShapeShiftingMasterofDarkness
Fuckin cuntbag. Put it back the right way round before I deck you
SadBeep
Was that deck or dick?
TheRaptorJezuz
Deck, it means he'll knock the fucker out so they fall onto the deck
SadBeep
I'm aware of what "deck" means but with their pronunciation/accent it could sound like dick...
TheRaptorJezuz
Haha, only if it was a Kiwi sayin it
Whwat
depends on whether youre a sheep or not.
AliBarber
Definitely deck if they're Australian
IAkuTheShapeShiftingMasterofDarkness
Yeah I wouldn't wana dick an Aussie. Though they say "dick" instead of "deck". Siiiiiiek maaayte
AliBarber
Other way around. Kiwis saying deck sounds like dick to Aussies. Source: I'm a kiwi and and got mocked relentlessly for it
IAkuTheShapeShiftingMasterofDarkness
I know, I know. But it's the other way around when listening to aussies. As a half English man half kiwi I prefer kiwi accent over
SadBeep
Finally, someone that got my little joke
TeamOneE
HettWhen
Youguysmademyday
Unprofessionalphotographer
natfarrady42
Super rugby?
killyourconscience
just regular rugby
natfarrady42
Ok. I don't watch to much Southern Hemisphere rugby, and the jerseys were different so I assumed it was that league.
FEMAcampsarereal
Lord save me, that's not fucking rugby.
natfarrady42
The gif or super rugby?
FEMAcampsarereal
The gif.
VodkaPls
Sounds like a terrible superhero.
Ryknel
Oi mate im moving back soon and I'd appreciate if you didn't get that shit blown up
DonkeyOfTroy
Wait I know this one: mate=enemy cunt=friend. So you're expressing actual anger towards an enemy. 10/10
c1328chase
Look out. He'll blow the ocean up again
PreciousPotato
UNLEASH THE WILDLIFE!
Norfolkanchancehere
Only thing north Korea would do is piss off the reptiles, then fat boy would have a shit storm coming his way.
ihateworkingongermancars
Do you want deathclaws ? Cause that's how you get deathclaws
Noob3rts
As a Canadian, I love my cousins and I will happily go with you to fuck up his shit in return. Let's throw the wildlife at em' to start.
Ripi
The fat boy, would have a rather more effective fat boy coming his way.
Ripi
https://static.turbosquid.com/Preview/2014/07/10__21_51_12/bobm3scene.jpg9f4676b0-f154-4e61-9e8d-481761bda72cOriginal.jpg
NERDRAGEohacat
Aren't there enough deadly creatures in Australia? Do you want Godzilla? Because this is how you get Godzilla.
pugofstardock
Godzilla wouldn't last a day there.
Ryknel
Send over the goanas and see what happens
abitofabuzzkill
Your 457 fell through?
ImScruffyImTheJanitor
Agreed. New Zealand is a beautiful country. Australia is full of shit that wants to kill you.
ImNotAnOrange
NZ has parrots that will break things off your car for fun, and steal anything not tied down
HavUSeenMyBaseball
It's alright we've arrested most of them there aren't many still at large
shakeandbake
Oi cunt. Even roses have thorns
MakeMeOneWithEverything
Too bad Aus isn't a rose, then. It's more like a cactus.
shakeandbake
Yeah nah, yeah nah.
MakeMeOneWithEverything
Yeah nah, nah yeah.
ACrowbarEnthusiast
As an American, is there something wrong with this map?
UmbralEntity
There are no canals connecting all of New Zealand like those in the picture.
UnremarkablyInteresting
its upsidedownunder
angrybadger44
Yeah it doesn't show you how much alcohol is in Australia...I mean..New Zealand *shifty eyes*
WhoSaidYouCouldEatTheLastCookie
kraut4200
Yes, it's showing countries we haven't bombed yet.
LoveBigD
Yes, you wanna sue us?
magila
I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because some people out there in our nation don't have maps uh I believe that 1
magila
our education like such as in South Africa and uh the Iraq,evrywhere like such as and I believe that they should our education over here in2
magila
the US should help the US er should help South Africa should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so that we will be able to build up our 3
magila
Fuck it I just can't write down this dumb bitches words anymore.
AMoldyStump
ILoveTomHanksAlsoCatsSuckDogsRule
Yeah AMERICA isn't on it.
Jusmar
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pine_Gap Don't feel bad, we've got a base that helps us run drone strikes on it.
NezzFalls
Sssh, don't tell them where Pine Gap is, my parents live in Alice Springs. :(
Jusmar
100% chance of them crashing it in the Philippine sea.
ACrowbarEnthusiast
HyJinkx
Yet
Aussieausti
As an Aussie, I approve of this... wait I meant the joke not invading us, stay the fuck away
PoopholeAintALoophole
Did someone say OIL? Or was that oi? Meh, ask questions later!
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
We're already part of their tactical network, which is worldwide except for about 4 points (out of just under a hundred) on the globe.
[deleted]
[deleted]
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
One of the points is Sumatra, Indonesia, near where there was an earthquake and tsunami in 2004. There were already American troops nearby.
nombre11
Not enough freedom
Gawky
pretty sure New Zealand is at the top of most Freedom indexes, unlike the Trumpanzees Murica
AliBarber
Actually NZ rates number 1 in relative freedom compared to America at number 7
Kiwionrails
http://i.qkme.me/3shyf7.jpg
thefinaldegree
Can confirm. Sauce: I'm a kiwi
[deleted]
[deleted]
chrishallett83
Lol no, enjoy having the NSA read all your text messages over there in Amerighanistan.
Ant4N
(Hey bro, it's a joke. I'm aware my country is shitty especially because we still have slavery)
ILikedTheirOldStuffBetter
Sorry, did I miss something? Is Kim Jong Fucknuts threatening Australia?
NobodyHasToReadThisCrap
Goddamnit. As an American I've contemplated moving to NZ or Aus., but it seems even you guys aren't safe from these nut jobs.
TheRaptorJezuz
She'll be right mate, there's a whole lotta bush they'll probably hit before it gets to a major city, plus their range stops around Darwin
CaptnRisky
He'd better pull his head in or we will have to set the kiwis on him and they will fuck 'em up. ANZAC spirit mate!
TinyLiehon
Let's be real here for a second. Every other country has thought about nuking your "charming" wildlife
SixFeetShort
Even the Aussies declared war on their fauna. The emus! Of all the animals to go after!
canonlyturnright
Yeah he threatened to nuke us. Tinpot fuckwit couldn't hit the side of a sheering shed with Hilux
OhNoItsTheDramaLlama
wow, I can't even read that accent!
FullCrimsonic
You're gonna get so many upvote with this mate haha
StopShootingMe
Said he'd nuke us if we side with the US, I have doubts the duct tape on their missiles could reach Australia though
OSCgal
I feel like NK should be more worried about pissing off Australia. Because they're closer and Australia.
clutchthepearls
What a cunt. Don't fuck with our Aussie or Canada bros.
sciby
Cheers mate. Likewise.
sciby
It's a bit late, considering all the US kit and 1500 US marines we've got on perm rotation in Darwin (poor bastards).
BossCar9
But, wouldn't siding with the U.S. pretty much be a death sentence for fatso dude if he actually tried something?
AgamemnonsMemes
Apparently it would be a 'very bad idea' for us to side with the US because we're within range, according to them. On the other hand 1/2
rockuhard
If North Korea fell out of a boat, they'd miss the water.
Xiphuro
Have you seen North Korea's missile tests? Japan isn't even in range
Imroy
IIRC, they've launched a missile over Japan. Still into the ocean, but a demonstration that Japan is in range.
OSCgal
Plot twist: they were aiming for Japan and missed.
ThoughtfulTortuga
North Korea isn't even in range.
minepagan
beat me to it
Shrais
I mean, technically it is since it does explode on their land
AgamemnonsMemes
They can pretty much just hit darwin so.. Not a huge loss.
BobLoblawLawBomb
Well fuck
crashlantern
Basically just killing thousands of crocodiles so yea nuke would just make aus safer
BuiltLikeATruckCuddlyLikeATeddyBear
"Shit. America's way out of range." "Threaten Australia to keep them from joining America." "Brilliant. Gotta threaten someone, amirite?"
GamingRooster
would that be the 3rd time it got fucked up?
AgamemnonsMemes
I know it was bombed by the japanese at some point so at least once before.
GamingRooster
cyclone Tracy
derekjohn
You do realise that if North Korea dropped an Atomic bomb on Australia it would be weeks before anybody realised?
hnk416
"Ayers Rock look a little different to you, Mick?" "Yea nah, same fuckin rock innit Mick?"
TheOtherTruth
Would they say "Did you feel that cool breeze?"
norrinraddsboard
well except for the measurable radiation...kinda like what happened in Sweden during Chernobyl.
ImGonnaSquirtHnnnnnggggg
I bet you're great at parties.
norrinraddsboard
k
Randompersonisrandom
This legitimately made me laugh
Imroy
Well we did let the Brits test a nuke (or more?) in the top end back in the 50's.
PrayForMojoTheBlurst
They tested a few
DreamingOfDistantShores
"Hey mate, does the weather seem a lot cooler around here suddenly?"
stou
Good place for a cult to develop a nuke https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banjawarn_Station#Seismic_event
d0o0o0d
If the Norks go for center-mass, it might not be noticed at all.
88wut
The next five Mad Max movies would be done in the same year.
10dm2
At that point it will be more like a documentary.
Zporadivk
This was my first thought upon seeing the articles. It's practically a nuclear wasteland already, no-one would notice the difference.
UnknownSquid
Plot twist. The radiation mutates the plants to be supernaturally hardy, causing massive growth and turning the outback into thick jungle.
mindipedia
Somebody find me a cool book about this scenario! For i am lazy :(
zomnoms
And the animals that want to kill you get bigger and harder to kill.
Havok707
imagine they hit the northwest desert. 5 days later : "what daya reckon that flash was mate?" "No clue"
DownvotesAreFun
Was probably the sun anyway.
Azated
Johno says that Bozza blew up his meth lab, but I reckon it was just Robbo with his 308 hitting the roos again.
ProudAussie
Gina Rinehart fell over
FullCrimsonic
Gold
Havok707
Underrated fat joke of the year right here.
TinyLiehon
Nah clue *continues wrestling gators*
CreepiestThingIveSeenAllWeek
Who the hell keeps releasing these in-vahsive species?
scottyzelsnyder
Imagine fallout, now imagine radiation changed monster's, now imagine radiation changed monsters from Australia. http://imgur.com/8V8jPC3
GreenRaspberriesLouLouBear
An Australian Preston Harvey. Eww.
Someone106
I don't see a difference.
The701
Just shine a bit of starlight on it, it'll go away.
Ryanator50
WITNESS ME BROTHER!
definitelynotawolf
Fallout 5: Outback
fmsrttm
Kinda want to play this
TheQuestionFewpeopledoFeweventhinktoaskthequestion
if you want to play that just go to perth and you'll have the real thing
Voodoomancer
Plot twist: game takes place before the bombs.
Thekingofbeans
Really it might just make them LESS deadly.
d0o0o0d
Ya, we'd have a better chance to see 'em coming.
Merrak
So...just like Australia now then?
TheQuestionFewpeopledoFeweventhinktoaskthequestion
no it would be like perth
TheQuestionFewpeopledoFeweventhinktoaskthequestion
just all over expert for perth we don't speck of perth anymore