TheWeekendMemester
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Nov 20, 2017 1:07 PM
TheWeekendMemester
185318
3094
133
PersonWithAPaintbrush
I'm Pisces so I could only dream of this
SectsDryve
"There's no cure for being a Virgo." - Bronn
TwelveZ
Im a Tauros. All I just want to do is eat and sleep.
SmileDHJ
Honestly I just like reading this shit, I find it comical
tomyironmane
Yeah, I know. I'm a taurus, I'm an expert in bullshit.
TheToeGasher
Its almost as if the position celestial bodies millions of lightyears away have no effect on our personalities what so ever ....
Whitehawk7564
Ah, girl code and guy code were such good shows
WadeAM
I don't know what's gonna happen man, but I wanna have my kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames
dontcallmecrazy
Namotatop
I'm a virgo and in germany we just use the same word as virgin for it and it literally means "young woman" so I shut my mouth about it.
AnimeSourcerer
I wasn't going to comment until I noticed no other Aquarius's had commented and that seems just about right.
Vildvarg
Aye.
EchoOfSnac
I'm a Capricorn. I don't know what that means beyond being some freaky half-goat, half-fish thing.
StephNugs
I don't believe in the signs stuff, but I totally fit the role of a libra : ^)
epsilonmonkey
Virgo's aren't cunts.
TheRealStalinWhoIsStandingUp
I don't remember what mine is but I share it with Hitler and napoleon and I like painting so I guess I'm going to invade Russia
shiftingillusion
Just don't do it during winter
AstronautChicken
It's hard not to take it a LITTLE serious when youre a Scorpio. They make us seem so bad ass.
HibiscuitsTea
Ive had the best sex with Scorpios.
josethemailman
I always viewed the Zodiac like I viewed religion. If you want to believe in it, go for it, but don't expect anyone else to follow along
LaughingInTheFaceOfDanger
See I'm generally a man of science but my experience has been that if I know a sign of and read the repairs of someone I date it's usually
LaughingInTheFaceOfDanger
Right about 90% of the time. I myself am very libra. Experiences can affect the sign to greater or lesser degrees. Just my experience.
admiralfuckwit
Hey Doug Stanhope did this bit on his special No Refunds in like 2006/07
ThePotatoBandito
Haha as a Capricorn, I could care less about any of your comments, so long as my comment has more upvotes!
AdolfEngels
Virgos aren't cunts, Geminis, Scorpios, Capricorns and Aquarius are
BluePineapple64
People who believe in horoscopes and astrology are literally dumber than flat earthers. Pinnacle of idiocy.
UserSaysAsUserDoes
Learning time... So when the astrological calendar was made it literally meant in which constellation the sun appeared to rise from but...
UserSaysAsUserDoes
due to leap days and other timey stuff they are now at least a month out of time, so when you say you're a libra, no you're a scorpio
goingtochipotlewitharistotle
This is hilarious. People are going to have to readjust their confirmation bias by a month.
UserSaysAsUserDoes
when someone learns this they should either rethink their life or find the nearest astrology chart and panic about the fates!!!
FestivePunda
I'm cancer. Literally.
whoopsiedaisies
What a cancer thought to have.
StarkeRealm
Hi Cancer, I'm dead.
FestivePunda
Hi Dead, I'm Cancer.
hotdropoclock
Hi Cancer, i'm slowly dying of you.
SojaExiles
I knew it. I'm surrounded my virgos.
LemmingAttack
Keep firing, virgos!
Nathanfake
sorry (i'm a canadian virgo)
FriendlyAggressor
masarian
Didn't they make a new sign recently?
Applepotamus
GlowstickJedi
Such a Taurus thing to say.
jumpoff69
I'm a Taurus & I would totally say that.
TheEvenPrez
I don’t know why I looked for my sign...
aPokal
Sun is a star. Earth is a planet. You stand corrected.
PrincessDonaldTrumpBANNED2
It doesn't effect your life, but the time you were born has some impact on who you are. For instance, my wife was born on xmas
PrincessDonaldTrumpBANNED2
And she will murder her husband if her Xmas and bday gifts rolled into one event.
Ghobe
Unh huh, that's what the dinosaurs thought too. Where they at now huh!? HUH!?
consistentprogress
https://gph.is/2cg9HoV Beg to differ.
OverlyOptimisticGuy
But they told me I was special ...
morithum
Iliketrainsies
morithum
Almost chose that one lol
SupMelloMike
That's what the stars and planets want you to think.
CatsIsTheAnswer
"I never had sexual relations with that woman" - Aldebaran
biggreencow
"It's hot today" - Alderaan
TouretteBadger
Looking for love in Alderaan places
Applepotamus
df209
Virgos are actually extra bitchy...
hemmi
How dare you
debunker
Astrology is extra fake...
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debunker
OK, well yes, it exists. I'm still disturbed that I'm being downvoted. It's unbelievable how many people believe it to be science.
[deleted]
[deleted]
debunker
Right. That's why I corrected myself and said "it exists". My point is that whatever it proposes to do is "fake".
ThisIsNoCave
Honestly, my opinion of anyone dips a couple points whenever they take astrology seriously in any regard.
goingtochipotlewitharistotle
Same. It reveals a high level of gullibility. I also can’t stand when someone asks me my sign as a way to get to know my personality better.
XIIV13C100111
I'm an Sagittarius, and I think we should all just get along.
Ikeepforgettingmyusername8
I am an idiot, and I disagree
Enoan
I'm playing in a D&D campaign where Tarot, Zodiac, actually mean things, and somehow, despite literally rolling for birthdays, they fit.
coolaggro
I think the same of anyone who buys tabloids in the checkout line. A higher number than you would hope
ThatsMySecretCapImAlwaysHorny
When I see on the news 1/12 of the population got run over by a bus, I'll believe.
scatter
It really makes online dating easier, I can just ignore anyone that lists their sign in their profile.
DrKriegersClone
And there are surprisingly many of them.
freeloaderr
As a Gemini, I completely find it hilarious and agree with you
Ikeepforgettingmyusername8
As a total fucking moron, I agree
MissAizea
Yeah, I am always surprised when someone references their sign.
ThisIsNoCave
I bless the rains down in Africa
AuthorAD
Ehhh, let people enjoy things, I'm not into it but as long as your not a dick, you do you
ThisIsNoCave
They are more than welcome to enjoy things. And I treat everyone pretty respectfully, IMO. But, yeah, this changes my perception of them.
TheWeekendMemester
Same
BoredLibrarian13
Among other cultural artifacts, this changes their behavior. I’d know, I’m a Leo
Ikeepforgettingmyusername8
I'm a human and don't believe you
PoopFrosting
as an aries, we're known to take it less seriously than other signs :^)
TheWeekendMemester
This +1
CygnustheBananaSwan
“Astrology”
ILikeCharmanderOk
Only a couple points?
ThisIsNoCave
How they treat other people counts for a lot, in my opinion.
ILikeCharmanderOk
Yeah but so does a brain in my opinion LOL
ThisIsNoCave
See, I went to grad school with some really brilliant people. But many of them were utter assholes. Sooo, that's shaped my worldview...
ILikeCharmanderOk
Fair enough, I'm going to continue hoping that it's not too much to ask for a brain AND basic human decency in a friend : - )
VioletMoonRising
I don't see how it's different than spiritual belief.
ILikeCharmanderOk
Well, seeing as both are unsubstantiated, retarded belief systems for irrational and ignorant peasants, I agree with you.
redwolf2k
Its not...its all bullshit
ThisIsNoCave
Maybe. But some of it is more demonstrably bullshit than some other parts
ThisIsNoCave
Well, when it comes to believing in a deity, there's ultimately no real evidence for or against. Astrology is demonstrably false.
TheManInTheWall
Point.
nihilistdad
If you accept the possibility of any sort of supernatural, then anything goes. What if a deity falsifies all tests of astrology on purpose?
ThisIsNoCave
Can you ultimately prove there is no such deity? Yet you can demonstrate when Astrology incorrectly predicts events or personality types.
nihilistdad
Read my comment again.
mineovermatter
I like the argument,but...we can probably say the same for astrology.It conflicts w/general concept of a rational universe though->
mineovermatter
So,like a diety,makes it a scientifically useless/unprovable concept.
PerroMalcriado
I'm an aries and a goat in chinese zodiac, so I'm allowed to violently ram into people, that's just how things are
GalacticMile
I initially read that as "a goat cheese".
KyndMiki
I'm aries too! *headbump*
ShibiSF
I'm an aries and a cock. I have no other words.
EchoOfSnac
I'm a Capricorn Monkey. So I'm some king of freaky goat-fish-primate. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
TheDespot
Im a taurus and a tiger. I gore then eat people. How lovely.
UltimateJeja
I'm an Aquarius and a dog. I'm a Labrador, I guess?
pewpewpotato
I too am an aries but a dog in chinese zodiac. Lets ram into people and bark at them together.
deluxury
Same!
spooncats
Crazy how nature do dat
Hakusen
Most people are made by ramming into girls, so at least you have a story for your future children.
ScimmiaSpaziale
I am tauru and lion ascendant. and also mouse. i.. have problem.
SuperHir0
I hope you drive a bumper car.
PerroMalcriado
oh, you thought I was talking about cars (tackles stranger)
Kovahjin
I mean you could *also* drive a bumper car.
Jyrroe
I'm aries and a goat too... 1991?
nihilistdad
I bet you'll make great soup, too.
MrBayernMunchen
OK calm down Zidane.
WhiteningMcClean
I'm a chicken and a crab, which means you need to eat my meat
SnarkyScience
Ha ha ok that’s pretty good.
SensibleChuckleNorris
I'm a taurus and a rabbit in Chinese zodiac. I'm a determined bunny.
SecretlyThreeDucksInAManSuit
I'm a virgo and a rooster which is why I can't FUCKING GET LAID AT ALL.
Balenar
im a snake and a pisces so i guess i need to lose my limbs
IHateThisWholeProcess
Me too!!
superfluffynator
I'm a dog in chinese zodiac, so I'm a good boy
FireflySky
I'm a Leo and Tiger.... so pretty much a Liger. I was bred for my skills in magic.
dragoonthevoter
I’m a dragon, so that means I’m allowed to set people on fire, eat them and steal their sheep. Just how the river flows...
pesticidefree
Wow you’re double the stubborn !
GuardsmanMiku
i'm a scorpio so i'm allowed to violently stab people with my tail
Rkhbusa
Libra dragon, I’ll burn your world down but with a self righteous sense of justice.
Sharangir
Lion & Dragon. One day I will burn it all down, but for now I'll sit here and rest.
shiftingillusion
Me too! Hello, friend!
Laeryc
Libra Doggo, yes I am silently judging you
TheLavabenderGuy
Libra Goat... Huh.
StopAskingMeForAnAccountImgurIWannaLurk
Libra Tiger here. I guess I'm a balanced kitty.
consistentprogress
I'm a Pisces dragon. Hey! I'm viserion!
shiftingillusion
Nice! Leo Dragon here
TheIncrediblePirate
FELLOW RAINBOW HEART!
consistentprogress
TheIncrediblePirate
Is your name from Friends???????
consistentprogress
BitchButcher
I am two tigers! That's right. Two!
Laeryc
so you hate yourself?
BitchButcher
No but I can maul you two times faster than just one tiger.
Laeryc
Considering one is astrological and the other is animal how you got Two is beyond me
BitchButcher
Gemini :)