lunarbaboon
127961
2661
72
www.lunarbaboon.com
May 28, 2017 12:31 PM
lunarbaboon
127961
2661
72
www.lunarbaboon.com
FartsSmellBad
But then there's the time your hand-hold distracts her while she's trying not to fart
ikcin
@Warrennotso
Jack0307
I usually opt for pictures of cute animals, but I guess this works as well.
benadrylbumblebutt
usually pictures of cute animals are easier to come by :(
BuddhaBeettle
Why not both?
OnlyCommentNeverPost
she only wants cuddles and food
BananaForScaIe
And wine. And a good schlonging.
DrunkIrishAstronaught
So she's a cat?
OldAceMerrillUsesDynamite
Only if she's also a complete asshole and pisses on the furniture.
wandergeist
Don't we all?
BukkakeRider3000
Yes. Cuddles, food and a blowjob every now and then.
ibeandrew
Going to try this. Will report back.
WellBehavedZombie
I can't recommend doing this on a park bench, the woman was stronger than me and crushed my hand and walked away laughing.
ibeandrew
Lol
IshitOnWindshields
Status report
ibeandrew
Mission accomplished. Incoming pecks on the cheek.
HurderFlurder
Congrats on your happiness
ibeandrew
First time I've been happy in a long time. Thank you.
CapsShield
now.... Mission report, December 16, 1991.
gammelgubben
So happy for you happiness.
ibeandrew
Had to grind to get here. Keep your head up.
TheNax
But on the other hand, many people will die alone. I should know, Im one of em.
gammelgubben
Yeye I know, thanks <3
SkeuomorphicallyInclined
60% of the time, it works every time.
vaultboyarchie
Andonemorething
Sooooo , let's talk about the other 40%
toby516
We don't talk about the other 40%
Andonemorething
It's-it's me isn't it? I knew it. *takes the chocolate cake,forks and plates back to the kitchen*
funnyaccepted
evilgriff
funnyaccepted
SillyNarrator
The other 40% of the time she just lets your warm welcoming hand envelope hr cold dead hand n lets it rest beneath yours completely lifeless
SillyNarrator
Because she's decided that she hates you. Because you gave her chlamydia. But you didn't know you had it. Because u haven't had any symptoms
SillyNarrator
And before her you had a dry spell that lasted five years. So like, why the fuck would you think you've got an STD? But apparently you do.
SillyNarrator
Because before you came into her life she got tested and was given the "all clean" test result. But now you're having a baby together.
SillyNarrator
And it was when she got her blood tested during a check up after for months of pregnancy that she found out she's got chlamydia.
NICEUSEOFWORDSSIR
Or your money back.
Azerai
But i didn't pay you anything
Andonemorething
You payed me with your company.
Azerai
I want a refund
Andonemorething
SvenGuy
Guaranteed
MinnesotaTom
NAKED MAN
OZVerti
But wait there's more!
Retromorphic
https://goo.gl/FrbCFv