It's my birthday today and I've never felt so alone

May 26, 2016 2:59 AM

pandaeyed

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35807

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1526

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293

Last week, I found out that my partner of 6 years was cheating on me and had been lying to me for months. We'd planned on having a family together, and every time I got suspicious about where he was, he'd use that as an excuse - "You're crazy insecure and I need space because I'm unsure whether I want kids right now." Then I found receipts as evidence of the cheating. Also found were ripped up notes as to pros and cons of breaking up with me. Like a crazy person, I painstakingly taped these back together. The biggest pro of breaking up with me? Caroline. Underlined several times.

Today's my birthday, and also the day he moves out of our shared flat. I honestly don't know how I'm going to cope with the hole left in my life. I've never felt more alone and scared.

TLDR; long-term boyfriend cheated. Feel utterly alone on my birthday.

You are brave and also feeling lot of pain, but never understand the love for how to act, you are awesome, and know one will change that

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The hole you feel is from what you once had. That was over a long time ago. Be like Rafiki, focus on what can be, not what was.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I know it doesn't feel like that, but this is not the end. Its the begining of a better life. You made the right choice. Be proud of that.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

If this is how he treats you, good riddance! Be glad you didn't have a family with this jerk. Give yourself the time you need to heal.

9 years ago | Likes 85 Dislikes 2

Wife did the same, lied forever. We had a kid. Ouch

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I know how you feel. My wife of five years (been together for 8) has been unfaithful and all that came up last weekend. You're not alone

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

OP, I think you will learn the hole in your life has been there for a long time. He was wrong for you for many months.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Chin up op plenty more fish in the sea, just get a huge cake and go wild with it. Lol

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Ok, good luck, life is a pain sometimes... Thanks for sharing, we back you up. Be strong please

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You do NOT need some jerk like that in your life! Now you're free to find your soul mate and make all the babies with him (or her?) and 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Never have to feel insecure or unsure if they're being faithful. Stay strong OP! Happy birthday, please buy yourself a drink/cheesecake!

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

After going through a storm, there is always a bright and beautiful day ahead of you.. congrats and wish you the best!????

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Might feel impossible now, but your life is actually better without someone like that. In 5 years you'll wonder why you stayed so long.

9 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 0

I got fired on my birthday. A Friday. And a normally scheduled day off. It was miserable, BUT I wound up in a better paying career, a new li

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Life path.... It was a gift that took forever to be seen. And I have a suspicion your situation is going to be the same

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Congrats on getting out of an abusive relationship! https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslighting

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

CAROLINE. she's the reason for the word bitch.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Can't say anything everyone hasn't already said but you deserve better op, keep on keepin on :)

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Better now than finding out later with children in the mix. Sorry, OP. You deserve better.

9 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 0

Happy birthday! Pro: didn't have kids with a cheater and you have a chance to have a happy life and family with someone better :D

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Eventually he'll probably realize Caroline is a bitch anyways, then hopefully regret his decisions in the future. Sorry OP.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

These things suck. They do however always get better and right now if you can muster it you just need to go hang out with friends.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

If you were a guy I'd tell you to get laid as much as possible. I'm not sure that works for lady types but if you think so give it a whirl.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

We're not so different. Right now, it's too fresh though. Eventually.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

A little bit the same. Although I would tell a guy to do it anyway. "Best way to get over some one is to get under someone" is what I say.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 3

I'm sorry @OP. Mine left me while I was doing chemo. I didn't think I'd ever be okay again, but I'm still here. It's hard. I'm sorry.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Two weeks ago I found out my wife of 9 years is having an affair. It hurts it's painful. One day at a time OP. You are not alone.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You are the better person. He broke your trust, but you are still trust worthy and honourable and have more integrity than he ever will.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

@op my girlfriend of 8 years recently left me for similar reasons. I'm sorry that happened to you, if you want to talk feel free to message.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I'm sorry. It's fucking shit, isn't it?

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Yeah it really is. Life sucks but you have to learn and move on. Even if it takes time.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Dude no. That is a terrible idea.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

What's a terrible idea lol

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You know how two people talk about something and say "we have that in common" and smile about it, this shit ain't one of them

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

You need time. Then loneliness will pass, will you stop to feel stupid and useless and, suddenly, you will return to smile. Happy birthday.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I have lived a similar story two years ago, after five years in together.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm sorry. Happy birthday op, just know that you can and WILL do better

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

*hugs*

9 years ago | Likes 38 Dislikes 0

*Hugs mentally from a respectful distance*

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

*joins hug*

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

*Sees group hug has become too large & awkwardly stretches to pat @OP's head*

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You're single and got your own place. Not to shabby of a starting spot. Now dry your eyes and wet your lips. Happy birthday.

9 years ago | Likes 443 Dislikes 3

I volunteer as tribute to "wet her lips"

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 19

fine, she can wet her own lips with a vibrator instead

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

Yasssssss. Want to be my life coach?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yes! #1-3

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Better you found out he's a twat waffle now than later.

9 years ago | Likes 99 Dislikes 1

AGREED!!

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Guess you're a Londoner too... Cunt Twattington

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Too*

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 8

Go fuck yourself.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 4

Hahaha

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

@OP

9 years ago | Likes 674 Dislikes 3

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 2

I laughed. Inapprops.

9 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 2

Tots.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Um, excuse me,

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

I like you

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

me or OP??

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You...I like you, @TylerTax, specifically you...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

thanks man

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Any time, my brother. You've got the kind of sense of humour thar I like. If you have a beer with you, cheers!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"Sweet Caroline..."

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 6

Ba ba baaaa

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

thank you for that

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

I got you

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1