Enlightenedwoof
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My dog has been the one thing that has kept me sane over the years but out of nowhere he started throwing up. 3 times in 5 days and having accidents on top of that. Knowing that I couldn't really afford it I took him to the vet anyways, got an examination, and a full scope blood test as they recommended since he had multiple symptoms of heart worm or stomach parasites.
It turns out that he's just very allergic to beef and some of the treats we recently got contained it. I was really relieved. The problem was to get there I had to pay a $908 bill. The emergency cost alone was $250.
My roommates just asked me to pay my share of the groceries which was $100 but I only have $42 in my account until Friday. I asked them if I could pay Friday but they were very forceful about me paying it that day. I got so embarrassed that I didn't have it that I told them I would just buy my own food which has sparked a lot of recent in home fighting.
I just can't admit to them that I'm broke. I feel like they already think I'm a failure. They even told me not to get my dog because I wasn't financially sound or mature enough for a dog. This would just give them the proof that I am those things.
I don't care if anyone sees this I just want to get it out.
Pup in the vet office
Edit: I do want to give some background about Fenrir's living conditions since there are multiple comments about me not being able to provide. Fenrir is a 30lbs pomsky who was rescued from a shelter that takes in puppies from puppy stores that have exceeded a certain age. He gets 5 walks a day. My roommate and I give him endless love and attention. We live in a big townhouse with plenty of room to run around and play. I personally feel that I can afford him. Trust me when I say that I don't feel that I saved Fenrir. He truly saved me and it's very hurtful to see comments say I shouldn't have him when that would have likely resulted in me not being here to make this post.
Update - I've taken a lot of your advice and came clean to my roommates. They were unexpectedly understanding and said to not even worry about paying my share this time. For those who are offering assistance, I really appreciate it, you all are so unbelievably sweet but I should be fine. Thankfully I get paid Friday and then I can purchase some food.
justravenhere10
Have you price per insurance? They can repay you for emergencies like this.
jenProblemShaper
"They even told me not to get my dog because I wasn't financially sound or mature enough for a dog. This would just give them the proof that I am those things. " They were right. Now all you can do is move on and understand what they meant. All you can do is learn from this. Accept that your roommates, who depend on you for food money, are upset. I'm sorry for your upset. It happens to us all.
whatintarnation9
For future unexpected animal expenses, look into care credit. A lot of vets take it and you can pay it off during the promotional period without interest.
Omoi113
This is why I told everyone who just got a dog or cat to get pet insurance. $30 to $50 a month will save you a lot of headache, heartache, and bankaccountache as well ....
mabelbagel
OmNachoMama
I'm glad you got squared away. If you can afford it and are in the US, buy pet insurance. It can be as low as $25 - $30 per month, and it can save you (and Fenrir) in the future. Nationwide offers a decent policy.
BeingABotIsRad
If they like the dog, then just tell them. It's a little different for them to say "don't get a dog you can't afford" and "you should have let your dog die", especially if they've gotten attached.
Djones06236
Just explain the situation. The majority of us have to deal with financial issues sometimes. So, just tell them what happened and ask them if they can help. The sooner you talk to them the better.
TalleyZorah
Check out the Pizza Angels on here. I can't recall his username to tag him.
MisanthropicMath
@TheFreePizzaDude and the Pizza Angels may be able to help indeed
CaptSheffield
If you can't afford it, don't buy a dog. And not the best dog if you don't have space for it. And having roomies I don't see that.
InUseSpace
Couldn't agree more. Don't buy a dog. Adopt one from a kill shelter. Even if you can barely afford it, you're still giving them a life of love and getting a companion to keep your head screwed on right because you must take care of it. Even if you leave them in a crate 8 hours a day while you're at work, they still get 16 hours a day with you instead of 24 hours a day in a cage till they're euthanized. Now, if you meant poor people shouldn't have dogs, ever, I disagree.
arikelrecords2000
You're that dogs hero, you're not a failure.
SerenePrincess013
If you buying your own food has sparked some arguments, I would wonder who in the house is eating beyond their financial contributions. Your dog is not their responsibility, & them pressuring you to not have your dog bc of some bullshit gaslighting "you're not mature enough" also makes me worry that this isn't a healthy situation for you or your precious Drama Queen. & I say this as someone who nursed a diabetic cat for 5 yrs on minimum wage.
Mountons
Let's not forget that vets charge ridiculous fees for services.
Jace99
So sorry. We spent a fortune finding out our dog is allergic to all meat. And he’s a hunting dog! Well we don’t use him for that, but he’s bred to be one. Kind of embarrassing when someone asks his breed. “He’s a vegan Harrier”.
eightyearplan
https://www.tasteofthewildpetfo">ar-tick/">https://www.tasteofthewildpetfood.com/health/protect-pets-from-lone-star-tick/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31540167/
Breastbeakfastever
Get pet insurance, in Australia it's about $80 a month and my $10,000 vet bill was like $600 for the excess and that's it. I imagine a smaller bill would be completely covered?
thevortexmaster
I'm not one to spend a ton of money on my dog if it gets sick or hurt but my wife is, so in turn I'm willing to spend a ton of money on my dog. That being said I hope your friend is okay and if I was your roommate I'd not only understand but I'd help with groceries
rbudrick
Buying your own food is the way it should have started anyway. I've never seen a time when sharing grocery costs didn't end up an abusive situation. Someone always takes what they shouldn't.
rudeandruthless
You can try your local food bank.
deadtedw
This. I was out of work a couple years ago and a local food bank fixed us up every week with an amazing amount and variety of food. Meat, dairy, veggies, bread, desserts. It was shocking what they gave us weekly for about a year.
eightyearplan
https://www.findhelp.org/
realevil
This is great! I have so many immediate needs clients who find themselves facing legal stuff because of their set backs. I can help with legal but a lot of these resources get them back on the right track too!
nakoruru876
That situation sucks. I get it. Diagnostics are super expensive n matter what. I paid 8 grand to try to figure out why my cat wasnt eating and it ended in cancer. He was only 7 and had great health up to this point. And the money i had that i was going to use on other things wasnt available for other things. So I got insurance for dogs and cats so when those situations happen, I wouldnt be out so much again. Your not a failure, animal healthcare is just so expensive.
nakoruru876
My insurance is Pets Best if anyone interested. I have a 1000 deductible and they pay 90 percent after I reach the deductible. Monthly premium 96 for 2 cats and 2 dogs.
PhilKenSebbensLeftEye
Never be embarrassed of being broke. NEVER. Your worth is not your wallet ever and good friends/ sane people know this and are happy to help.
Anon9999999999999
I think a lot of non-pet-owning people don't understand that 95% of the time, pets are super affordable. $90 and I can feed 3 large dogs for a month. It's the other 5% of the time that it becomes untenable because unlike Hospitals or Clinics, Vets won't bill you, they demand payment right away, even though vet bills can be, and often are, just as expensive as normal medical bills.
PrincessWasabi
But that’s part of owning a dog, the unexpected emergencies. You have to be able to afford everything if you want to be a good parent
Enlightenedwoof
I would agree with this. I had to get him a specific food type which is $70 for 30lbs but this will feed my dog for 3 months. The frustrating part about this hospital was they wouldn't give me pricing like my vet office would. That felt very predatory especially when they said things like "Don't you care about your son's quality of life?".
ShadyEsperanto
it's pretty gross to see all the people saying "lol you can't afford a dog." most people couldn't afford an unexpected $900 bill. I guess no one gets to have a pet anymore? "serves us right" I guess, according to these weirdos
IceNein
I’m honestly so disheartened by the cruelty. Maybe the OP shouldn’t have gotten a dog, but they have one now, so telling them they shouldn’t isn’t in the least bit helpful, and Is callous.
Fauxcused
I had to raid my 401k and take penalties to pay $6k after. My dogs were bit by rattlesnakes
Enlightenedwoof
That's awful. I'm so sorry to hear that. Please tell me your puppies are okay now
Fauxcused
Was told if they came in a half hour later they would not have made it. Full recovery but we're in the animal hospital for days to get stable.
Enlightenedwoof
Omg that is so scary. I'm glad they're alright! 6k though is just too much. How do they expect anyone to have that type of money. I'm so sorry 😢
Fauxcused
Rattlesnake antivenin was nearly $1000 per dose. Now I have pet health insurance that would cover major disasters like that.
Enlightenedwoof
That's insane... $1000 omg. That makes me want to take advantage of the training classes through the humane society to detect rattlesnakes. I have been looking at adding pet insurance myself after everyone suggests it and seeing how high these bills can get.
Corrodias
Pay your... share of groceries? You have a communal food pool? In my household, the only thing we share is milk.
ImAnActionBirb
Same here. We only officially share whipped cream and some spices. Occasionally share milk.
Corrodias
Yeah. It's stuff where you don't really use enough solo to burn through a container in a reasonable amount of time, and it's cheap enough that it doesn't make sense to account for who's buying it. Someone just gets more when it's low.
Corrodias
Come to think of it, I should probably make sure to buy the next jug or two of milk, because I tend to use it more than the others, and I haven't been the one in a few rounds.
ImAnActionBirb
This exactly. Good arrangement
sozensloth
when my husband and I lived with a roommate we basically did that, and only bought individually what the others didn't consumme. We cooked meals together and it was just more simple if we split 1/3 each. Plus: our roommate worked at a grocery store so he had a discount. We payed him our share after.
Corrodias
Alright, I can see it working out in specific circumstances like that.
Lajuku
Seems like an unpopular opinion here, but it is not unusual to do it this way in europe. The basic thought is, it will even out over time and it's cheaper to shop as a bigger group (buying in bulk, etc). It feels a bit hyper-individualistic to me, that apparently some people even have their own fridges etc.. 🤔
angryjeep
We did this in the US for basics bc one of us had a Costco membership. It can save you money that way on stuff you all buy
Corrodias
Interesting. People have different tastes and different appetites, so if anything, I'd expect it to diverge over time. In our case, we merely claim individual shelves of the fridge.
mebe21
Last time I had roommates, we split groceries and all grocery shopped together. Each of us had things the others didn't like, but it all came out about equal. Sometimes we would have to reject each other trying to buy something obnoxious, buy overall it worked. Then we just bought snacks and some other stuff individually. It probably wasn't perfectly fair, but we implemented it first time a fight about "they are my ___" broke out and it worked
Enlightenedwoof
This has been my first living situation where that has been the case, but yeah, they buy groceries that basically anyone can eat but it's all split.
PonyMadness
Fuck that shit. That just sounds sketchy and I wouldn't agree to split the grocery bill. Everyone should be buying their own food and share when they want. If you're doing something like a BBQ then it's fine to ask people to chip in or buy whatever they want grilled. Chips and sides are just shared by default.
SerialChickenLover
Sounds like a scam. I’m diabetic, so I’m not paying for your bread and sugar crap unless you also want to pay for my keto food, which is expensive AF
mcstreetz
Sounds like this is just a good opportunity for you to change the rules to a system that doesn't suck. They will get over it. I would've tried switching the food up if my dog was throwing up before taking it to the vet, but now you know, and your dog is ok. Sounds like the vet overcharged the fuck out of you too. I'd look into another vet in the future.
Noraneko
It's weird. People have different lifestyles. Around here too mies usually pay for some thing together like spices, oil, sugar, flour. My roomies and I also had bread, potatoes, milk, butter together. But everything else everyone byud for themselves.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
I'd hate this. We used to have camping weekends where a few people would buy all the food and everyone would split the bill. It would be like $100 for a weekend. One weekend! Back then I didn't even eat that much per week for groceries. Some of the others were getting a hell of a deal, obviously.
Corrodias
It sounds very silly, unless there's an unusual and compelling reason for it. They're just going to have to grow up and deal with buying their own food either way, because you literally cannot buy-in this time.
Brockvegas
That’s so weird. Not everyone eats same amount and likes same thing. I’ve NEVER shared grocery bills with roommates and I’ve had my fair share in my younger days. Hell even in my house if you want a specific treat you love and don’t want to share, but it yourself. Roommate is not family and groceries should probably be individually bought.
SodomySnake
Yeah, when I had roommates, maybe we'd all go shopping together sometimes and split the bill, especially if we were having a party or something, but it was never a "give me $100 and I'll go buy all the food" situation. That's just weird.
airen
I have a roommate that just pays half the food. Also pays half everything else we share. Oh shit, he is telling me to stop calling him a roommate bc we got married :0 xD
NotSinceTheAccidend
I had a roommate who calculates it by meal. And then by portion per person. That didn’t last long for the 3 of us but worked okay for a couple.