I have too many memes: Dump #94

Mar 8, 2025 9:52 AM

Sweenerd

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1192

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I have like three ideas for a Sherlock Holmes thing but 2/3 end up with Holmes and Watson making out at some point.

#48 Honey bees are just darling! Especially the foragers!

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#22 This is literally the story arc in the TV show Hannibal.

1 year ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#6 What do you mean Mark isn't in this photo, he's right there! Twice!

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

1 year ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

#41 this can't be real

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#14 "Attention all hands, this is the Captain." <- Inclusive, establishes authority.

1 year ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

#50 The Pre-Med Post Mortem

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#36 I just imagined a dragon grooming itself one leg in the air like a cat, and it did not seem menacing or powerful. My cats never present menacing or powerful poses, just goofy babies.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#10 bro is slobbing a knob.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#8 yo, it's Seaman!

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#9 use a made up name

1 year ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

#12 as a bi, I have compared myself to Danny Davito before

1 year ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

#14

1 year ago | Likes 50 Dislikes 0

#31

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#19 The people who don't give a fuck are the A in LGBTQIA2+

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#10 I would have taken the cat over Edward Hopper. His work is beautiful but there’s evidence of him not being a good husband or person…

1 year ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

The depths that the cat drove him to... We can't all be John Arbuckle.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For any Americans wondering about the 'mother' thing when pouring tea, it is absolutely a thing, but only with tea made in a teapot that you are sharing.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#40

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#14 Hmm, "to all those not yet my enemies," friendly, but threatening as that status could clearly change at any time!

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#8 "The Emperor has dissolved the Senate. The last vestiges of the Old Republic have been swept away. Fear will keep the local populace* under control; fear of this battle station**!"

*employees
**cancelling their work visas

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#50

1 year ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 2

"My screenplay!"

1 year ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

#50 https://i.imgur.com/AJqyvbQ.null

1 year ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

.null doesn't resolve.

1 year ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#35 or your balding and if you grow your hair out, you'll look like Gallagher.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#22 there’s an episode of house where they’re talking to a psychologist. She’s talking to Wilson and says “you seem a lot nicer than house yet your best friends” and he says “makes you think he’s nicer than he seems” to which she replies “makes me think you’re not as nice as you seem”

1 year ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

#40 Guess you'd prefer we go back to using mediocre which is definitely completely unaffected by this dynamic

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

#1 Tiber Septim is that you? “OH GODS, you’re gonna make me CHIM!” -Talos, probably

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#49 Selling the check marks makes them useless. The entire point is so that you can tell, at a glance, that this really is the person they're claiming to be. If everybody can be verified as Spartacus, then you have to act as if nobody is Spartacus.

1 year ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

Afaik it was never a verification of identity. It's more like a trademark. If you get famous under one name, that name is reserved for you now. Anyone pretending to be that famous twitter account (no matter whether the name is a person's name or something else) by using a similar username or the same displayed name now doesn't have the checkmark, so for professional accounts of famous people you know to look for the checkmark.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Yeah, that's my point. It verifies that they actually are the famous person. Now anybody with $8 can get a checkmark and impersonate, IDK, Keanu Reeves.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You're phrasing it ambiguously again. We probably mean the same but people could impersonate Keanu Reeves before. Like, pick a celebrity not on twitter, start believably posting as them, get verified. They don't ask you to prove whether you really are Keanu Reeves.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

I'm not sure how to phrase this in a way you'll accept. The purpose of the blue checkmark was to show who was actually Keanu Reeves and not just some troll pretending to be him. But now the identity verification is for sale.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

There is no longer any way to tell whether someone is the person they're claiming to be, since that's what the blue checkmark was for. Remember how some troll tanked a pharmaceutical company's stock by making an account pretending to be them and Tweeting that insulin was free? No one can tell who's the real one in a sea of fakes.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'm not sure why you're explaining all this to me. I'm pointing out that the superficial (and intended) purpose is subtly different from the actual process, in a way I think matters, and you seem to not disagree on facts but still double down on the simplified way, and then you explain it to me like I'm five. Like, thanks, but what do you think I didn't get? You're the one not getting why I disagree with your phrasing.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#41 I'm Welsh (technically British) I've lived in Wales my entire life. I can track my ancestry back 12 generations to all be British. I have not once heard this ever.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Maybe you’re not spending enough time around British people who have haunted dolls at home.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

They're probably dead on account of the haunted dolls murdering them.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#31 this is dumb. The whole idea of an RPG is to be someone I’m not. Like, y‘know - suave, athletic, perceptive. Replacing dice rolls with fortune cookie texts, however…

1 year ago | Likes 73 Dislikes 1

replace it with drawing a tarot card from the major arcana.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Tarot cards are surprisingly great for thia

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You don't need dice for RPG. Players role play and whatever moves the story along best is what happens.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I just assumed it was going to use cards for number generation instead.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Oooh I love that. Or inspirobot messages or something else that generates random-but-coherent sentences.

1 year ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

We‘ll try that on non-combat rolls in 2 weeks. Ordered a box of 72 fortune cookies.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

What bugs me is that many tables will still absolutely do this for Charisma checks. "Can I use Diplomacy to reason with them? I got a 15." "Okay but what do you say?" I don't fucking know, I'm not Gastere the Half-Elven of the Patchwork Scarf! I'm Dave from accounting!

1 year ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

I like my players to at least try and say something witty when doing a charisma check. They get to roll regardless, but it also helps drive the actual conversation that was happening. If the player's line is particularly good or bad, I'll give them a bonus of a penalty.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I think it's right to ask "what sort of thing do you say" without asking for a word-for-word fully acted scene. Just a vague angle of what you're going for. Something like "I reason with them by pointing out our kingdoms have been friends for centuries. I'm hoping to shame them." That way it gives the DM something to work with (and maybe helps set the difficulty/DC) but still doesn't require you to be good at executing that skill. Otherwise they're just roleplaying your character for you.

1 year ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Yup. This is what I do. The gist and the vibe are just fine, we can work as a table to figure out what's happening. We're all creating this story together.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I think tables should be okay with spitballing too. Like if you can't or don't wanna think up an angle to reason with a PC, turn to other players or the DM and ask "Guys, I think my character would wanna reason with this person but how? What should I do?" Your character, your choice, but a lot of the fun in roleplaying games is collaborating and planning together, and it takes some pressure off of making character decisions.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Except you are Gastere the Half-Elven of the Patchwork Scarf! Nobody else is Gastere the Half-Elven of the Patchwork Scarf! Who do you think is Gastere the Half-Elven of the Patchwork Scarf is? This is ROLE PLAYING, now do some ROLE PLAYING for my amusement and then you can roll the dice and see if it works.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's something I've caught myself doing, and try to work against it. It's easier to avoid if you more or less freestyle the NPCs, so it's easier to adjust them on the fly. Player rolls a nat 20 but can't come up with anything better than "so... um... do you like... cloth"? Surprise, the NPC is a craft hound and is super pumped to talk about this sweet bolt of damask they scored on a visit to the city, and the character "yeah, uh huh, tell me more"'s their way into Friendly status.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Yup. Working with your players is so very important

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In fairness, a lot of the mental stats are like that. You don't just get to role Int and suddenly have a good plan, the players actually have to come up with a plan. And we all have examples of players definitely not acting wise. Now, ultimately how this is implemented is different at each table, and I think that's good. Personally, I enjoy getting players actively into their roles and acting a bit. But other tables will certainly find that trying. TTRPGs are really a dozen different games

1 year ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I agree with that last part. I run my table differently. I recognize that we don't necessarily share attributes with our characters. I don't ask for a speech with a Diplomacy check or a full plan with an Int check for the exact same reason I'd never ask a player to lift a dumbbell for a Str check. Make the roll, tell me what you intend, we'll figure it out together.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I have my players roll a wisdom check when they're about to do something unwise that I don't think their character would do.
Ok by "players" I mean one specific player. Ok, I mean my son, he's new to the game.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It just feels very weird to pull out my pickup lines to my friend. For one I don’t want them to steal them, for two I <3 them as a friend.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I say we replace dice rolls with shaking a magic 8 ball for skill checks.

1 year ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

And if the player is doing something really dumb, the DM hands them a literal 8 ball and insists they shake that one and read the answer instead.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"Outlook not so good" would be a 1

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This is so amazing. Much more straightforward and easier to implement too! Would landing on a corner be a nat 20, a nat 0, or a reshake? 🤔

1 year ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Depends on the context (argue for validity) for example, Balance or Stealth lots of ways to make that fit as a nat 20 "So skilled the result is invisible" etc.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's amazing! So an edge or corner is like a real-world charisma check. 😂 I love that it adds a little bit of skill - anyone can roll a die and the number is the number. But it takes effort to convince the DM "look how sharp the corner is, that would be SO intimidating" or "the edge is showing the edges of the wound and how well I bandaged it" or "the dot is the spark of insight, it was too complex for words" etc.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Still technically a die roll.

1 year ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Not really a die roll. More of a die float.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ah, but you must consider these are not mutually exclusive. Jets can float and also roll.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Yeah but while the die inside is roll-able, it’s is not being rolled. It is being shaken, much like dice traditionally are, but it is not tossed and rolled, it is flipped and floated. While capable of both, only one is happening inside the 8 ball. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0