pilomotor
28141
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20
May 1, 2025 1:50 PM
pilomotor
28141
624
20
StormsSeven
I have severe nerve damage in my dominant hand. I can game, for the most part, but it's still difficult. Too much movement, or button bashing causes a lot of physical pain. But yep, I'm a deadbeat because I can't slave away in a high-labor job like everyone else (abled-mentality) can! I do what I can, even if it's "poor" compared to others. It's like being able to swim, but being compared to olympians...
HylianFox
There's this really bizarre and disgusting mindset that sick & disabled people deserve to be miserable.
RevolutionOnHerLips
I'm disabled and currently it's hard to play video games, even - I can do it for a while but my hands get exhausted and I get random stabbing pains in my hands and arms. How it differs from a job is primarily that I can quit playing it when it becomes too much, without repercussion, and I can start at any point I feel like playing, including not playing at all some days. None of those things apply to full time employment. I would LOVE to be able to work, I truly would, I miss money so much. lol
Dobster
I'm still sickened by a tabloid article years ago here in the UK. A semi high ranking police officer was signed off work for stress, but had been discovered officiating an amateur soccer match as a referee. The writer was exasperated at his deceit. How can he possibly be engaging in this activity when he is "too stressed to work" and being paid out of the hardworking British taxpayer's pocket!
Cervidaesigns
I'm still recovering from trauma related to someone branding me as a deadbeat parasite because I was struggling to keep and find work but played games in my free time, and spreading this narrative to mutual friends and strangers. I have stickler Syndrome, autism, and Chiari 1...
Mattzahball
I always used to complain that my stomach was killing me after my breakfast of cereal, yogurt, and a glass of milk. My parents just sent me to school because they thought I was just nervous. Guess who found out he was severely lactose intolerant 20 years later.
azazyel
That's why being a reader of books/comic books was a boon
Dontstopbelever2000ismyfavoritesoap
Let me tell you, as a dad, the "too sick for school, too sick for TV" has nothing to do with how sick you are and EVERYTHING to do with how much I think my 8yr old is just trying to stay home and watch TV
Zahnradfee
Have you found out WHY he wants to stay at home? What does he not like about school?
zoltarpanaflex
Whenever I woke up sick, my mother accused me of dodging a test. My sister was given days each month sympathy with her cramps, but all I ever did was dodge a freaking test.
RueandWoe
I was lucky. My mom was an ER nurse and when I got sick, she knew. Even if sometimes it was just stay home sick cause I was feeling down or something, she would let me because most of the time, I'd never ever miss school. I use the same thing on my son - if he's home sick, whatever he can do to comfort himself, he can do.
StellarJay77
America was founded on slave labour and has only rebranded the same mentality under the umbrella of capitalism.
CaptSchmidtGaming
its all cruelty for cruelty's sake. I can not speak to my family anymore becuase they are not awake to the fact that they subscribed to those kinds of mantras.
tzahtman
If I was too sick to go to school we were told to rest on the couch and watch tv. Half of The Price is Right viewers were probably sick kids.
gumblemuntz
It got rough when the soaps started after lunch tho...
Zahnradfee
Yeah.
One guy saw me work in the garden and said: "You're fit! You can work [for money]!" But what he doesn't see is that I'm putting less than 4 hours a day into it on average and that there are many days where I cannot do anything at all. Tell me which job will let you work only 4 hours daily with three days off a week and the option of sometimes taking a whole week off.
Zetor
Also: Containment. But I guess that went out of the window during COVID-19
barbarian818
It wasn't bullshit. It's about discouraging malingering. Middle son tried to (badly) fake sick many times during his elementary school years. Youngest faked it far more plausibly, but it was amazing the total recovery he'd achieve after 3 pm. The point about scrutinizing the disabled is true though.
ChickenChickenBurningBright
i never got that as a kid because in 1970 daytime TV was a wasteland of soap operas and game shows, while the lawless expanse of the UHF channels was all reruns of westerns packed with ads from personal injury lawyers. sick days were not fun after the third episode of The Price Is Right.
RawSugarPackage
To be fair, my kids expend a ton of energy playing video games.
MatrimBloodyCauthon
Videogames can give you energy. Dopamine helps a bunch. You go to that place? Numbers go up. You did good. Brain: :D (wakes up)
Mostlydeadpool
you actually get a fairly quick reward for doing so. dopamine aplenty.
mkwai
OMG that's exactly it. Maybe that's where this comes from.
alcaray
OK but how do you deal with kids who fake illness so they can play video games?
Zahnradfee
Find out why school is so boring for them. Or if they are otherwise unhappy.
I faked being sick due to bullying, and later due to being completely burnt out and having depression. I was always an avid learner, but it just became too much of a workload. Particularly with homework.
Navrodel
You think the people that want to dismantle safety nets because "they don't need it if they're struggling" actually noticed that "too sick for school, too sick for tv" was bullshit?
We've got a lot of objectively factual things in this world that fly in the face of policy for no reason other than puritanical policy holdover and "worthiness testing" that Victorian industrialists came up with to hide how blind they were robbing people. If logic mattered to policy, we'd be in a much different world
valkrez
What's funny is that I tell myself this as an adult
lordnequam
That's because a lot of people—consciously or not—are enculturated to associate "health" with "virtue", which means that sickness or disability reflects a lack of virtue. If you are unwell, it is because you did something that warranted it, and so punishment is an acceptable penance.
HylianFox
Yeah, this goes waaaaay back. Like anybody who isn't in peak condition somehow "deserved" it because God/karma/whatever. It's disgusting.
LostCaterpillar
I think in the case of children, there's a much more fundamental reason and that is that often you cannot accurately asses their internal state and so it's a basic question of trust. Does this child actually feel sick or are they claiming to feel sick so that they can skip school and play all day. By removing the play option it forces a cost on the child's decision that reduces their incentive to lie. 1/x
LostCaterpillar
Case in point: My neighbors kid was always claiming to be sick, every week, until the rule became "no tablet while ill" and suddenly their health improved 100%.
Is this a moral solution to the problem of potential dishonesty? I don't think it's so bad in the case of children but it's obviously atrocious when the cost isn't ruining one day for a child but the entire life of a disabled person.
drduffer
I regularly took days off from school claiming illness and was almost never really sick, and I think my mother knew it and just called it a mental health day in her mind.
She never fussed over me and allowed TV and other forms of play without interference.
Most of the time I was “better” by the end of the school day and I never had to go to the doctor for any of my “illnesses “.
Given the quality of public education and my own habits, I may have learned more at home anyway.
PhailRaptor
I learned more about Joan du Arc playing Age of Empires 2 than I did in my world History class. Video games can absolutely be educational.
Zange0
Have a learned a ton about religion through Smite? No. But did it make me more interested in world religions? Yes. Same with Crusader Kings and history, farming games and conversational ecology, or survival crafting games with organic chemistry.
Taalii
howdoiturnthisthingon
SteveMND
My parents always knew I wasn't trying to 'fake' being sick when I was a kid. That was because—almost without fail—whenever I DID get sick, it was during a vacation/holiday time off from school anyway. :(
Nanoline
It really does feel sometimes like the body knows where the downtime will be and goes “okay we can collapse now”.
Taalii
There may be some truth to that, evolutionary drive to keep moving till somewhere safe perhaps? Same way we now get fight or flight responses from social situations at work, because body/brain cannot tell the difference? Surely someone more educated than I has done some research somewhere
Mooseman1991
An instance im more familiar with is “Stage Health” in people who preform. Even when you were feeling garbage beforehand and are surely going to after, some force keeps you going on stage
Taalii
Show must go on as they say
Chocolatecoveredmoose
Im not that person but I remember being told about this and what you’ve said sounds accurate. And it explains why I always get sick in the evening.
KatInTheCorner
I am moderate needs AuDHD and really struggle to hold a job. I can get a job, I'm good at the job, but I burnout easily and need regular time off to recuperate. Days of literally nothing.
If I don't get it, my body goes into crisis mode, I get sick daily, can't eat, can't sleep, my brain becomes a suicidal nightmare. I needed ECT at one point it got so bad.
So I COULD have a job, if I could actually take regular time off to mitigate my sensory needs. But jobs don't do that, so I can't...
Zahnradfee
"I can get a job, I'm good at the job, but I burnout easily and need regular time off to recuperate. Days of literally nothing." ... Are you me?
KatInTheCorner
I've never been fired because I can't do my job, I'm often one of the best employees there.
I get fired because I call off. So I basically have to work a job until I can tell I'm burning out and then I have to quit.
So that makes my job history look like shit too. Folks with multiple degrees and a solid job history can't find work, and I have one degree and the spottiest work history...
If I try to get a job through disability services, a lot of those jobs pay less than minimum wage.
NariEllie
No lie, that's one of the reasons I got into education. My district has at least a week off every nine weeks, with additional days like labor day and MLK day. I'm able to make it just about long enough to get that long break.
KatInTheCorner
That makes a lot of sense. I spoke at length with my therapist about how my body was basically trained to do a school schedule. Although even that is a struggle. I missed so many days of school, and it took me almost a decade to get a bachelor's degree because I kept putting more on my plate than I could chew.
NariEllie
We do operate under that schedule for the first 18 years of our life. It's so stupid that we think people should be able to magically transition to a 9 to 5 after they graduate.
I'm also a huge proponent of the 4 day as school/work week. There's some schools in my state that have adopted that schedule and it's fantastic
ShieldAnvil1
To sick to go to school is to sick to play video games. I never thought that was bullshit even when I was in school. I get what you want to say but your analogy is bad.
MeestowKitty
Why? Specifically.
spherehole
to sick or not to sick
thelategirl
What the fuck is wrong with you. How is it even remotely similar. For starters, you don't have to leave your home (or even your bed!) to play video games. Secondly, you can stop playing video games anytime you like to do things like blow your nose, go to the toilet, throw up, have a nap, etc.
Thirdly, video games are usually less challenging than school work (maybe YOU find all video games too hard, but many of us don't).
Fourthly - STOP INFECTING OTHERS! STAY AT HOME IF YOU'RE ILL!
JustLettingPeopleBeWrong
Hi. I'm VERY disabled.
You're wrong.
ShieldAnvil1
K, I guess I am wrong about whatever argument you made up in your head. Never said you couldn't be disabled and play games hence I said the analogy is bad. if you are to sick to go to school for the day then you are to sick to play video games. I am sorry your are very disabled but that had nothing to do with my comment.
JustLettingPeopleBeWrong
I'm saying the analogy is good.
You can be too ill to leave the house, or think, or socialise, but fine to do something quiet and relaxed like play videogames.
I know this because I am disabled enough that this is often my reality.
Sorry your ability to infer meaning is stunted.
ShieldAnvil1
Sorry you can't avoid ad Hominem attacks in you're reply and it is a bad analogy.
Meladyx
Sorry you have the reading comprehension of a clay brick. :)
greyghost714
I got my foot crushed when I was T boned on my motorcycle and haven't returned to work. My job required significant walking and standing. Most days I could do my old job. Most days is the key. Calling in 1-3 times a month because some days I can't do anything doesn't cut it anywhere. Full or even part time means being ready on a set schedule which is impossible for some
GloriousPirateBeard
Learn coding. Friends did a couple month intensive course and he now makes good money working from home
greyghost714
Over 30 years ago I did. C, Fortran, Pascal, Basic, Cobol :-) But I ended up working with databases and SQL for almost 10 years, trained engineering sw for almost 20 years, and spent the last 5 doing engineering support in a manufacturing plant so I never did any actual programming in a compiling language. Just SQL, and various batch creation programs like Rexx
Rogahar
If our economy wasnt fucked up to fuck by the CEOs impulsive need to make the line go up by minimizing expenses at any cost, every job would schedule enough people on shift that a callout or two wouldn't mean having to find cover because there was still someone there.
lostinthoughts
I have frequent migraines and have to call off work while working part time. It's a hassle, but if I'm too sick to keep my eyes open, no, I can't even work for four or five hours.
Maxmar
Reading this, I am once again reminded how blessed I am to be in Europe where 1-3 sick days a month are absolutely not an issue and you still get paid regularly. I'm sorry you have to go through this experience.
greyghost714
I was a contractor at Ford. If I had been an employee I would have been on reduced duty and had increased flexibility.
PhailRaptor
That's the situation that FMLA policies are supposed to remedy
greyghost714
Motorcycles have odd insurance rules and rights in Michigan. Her insurance has to pay lost wages for up to 3 years. I'm nearing the 3 years and still won't be able to go back when their payout ends
ChuckleVoodooist
They're supposed to. But I'm fighting with my job right now about this. I don't have a GP because 1. It's expensive, and 2. No one near me has any openings. The closest that would take my insurance is 2 hour drive away. I go see a NP at a clinic for all my health needs, and they have been AMAZING! But my HR doesn't accept FMLA unless it's signed by a PCP. So I'm now at risk for losing my job. Because I can't do the work according to my job discription.
greyghost714
My GP's misdirection may have forced me to get a skin graft on my foot so I avoid him for most things
ChuckleVoodooist
I find that the clinic I go to is uniquely amazing. The NP I see has been the only health professional to actually sit and listen to me, she's very set on helping me figure out what's going on, when GP and other MD's have done nothing. I've had pain, swelling, and extreme black discoloration on my calf for 2 months now... Just 2 weeks ago it's gotten bad enough I can't walk on it. 3 MD's sent me home and said it's nothing.
CoinedWatcher
If a normal person feels how I feel on an avg day they would call off work.
Goldensands
Chronic illness sucks. I am so grateful to be Scandinavian. My every health care issue, including weekly fysio therapy and massage, is covered. I'm paid to study at uni, will be finishing a masters in psychology (no loan no debt no sponsorship contest) and once I'm done the state will help me find work within my ability to attend. It still genuinely sucks to be so ill of course but I can't imagine what it must be like in america.
Teratoid
Your experience is so beyond our comprehension it seems like fiction. We could easily afford it if we kicked out the oligarchs and cut back military spending by a fraction.
That and our government has been complicit in making education harder to attain. Educated citizens are harder to control.
A country that valued it's citizens would want everyone to do their best and have the best advantages. We only value people of a certain "type".
Goldensands
Exactly. It makes me want to scream and tear my hair off. It's a lived reality for millions, there's nothing fictional about it, and you could absolutely have it 2 - but a culture that worships stupidity, fame and money cannot be surprised when it gets what it gets. I have no sympathy for 2/3rds of you, the ones who voted for the fascist turd and the ones who didn't care to vote against the ending of your democracy. None. But that still leaves so many innocents suffering, kids especially.
Teratoid
It's not 2/3 of us. Not even half. When the burnt-out hulk that was the USA goes through the ashes we'll see how they rigged the game. It's why they bought the Get Out Of Jail Free card from our Supreme Court.
But even 1/3 is such a revolting number that it fills me with despair and breaks my heart. And they want blood.