Best thing I could have done.

May 14, 2017 2:46 PM

RaychelElsbernd

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90084

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When I was 17 I got pregnant. I was homeless and without family. Her father was no help he was 22 at the time and couldn't hold a job he was also cheating on me. My pregnancy wasn't celebrated, people would message me on how I would be a horrible a mother like my own mom. I had no one. So I decided to give her up for adoption in when I had her in 2011. I love that little girl with my whole heart I would do anything for her.

I understand my decision but it still hurts I still wonder it for I made the right decision. My biggest fear is that when I have kids in the future will she hate me because I couldn't raise her.

I'm sorry to vent it's just a bitter sweet day for me.

No! I think about my biological mother with such gratitude. She gave me a chance at a wonderful life with loving parents in a better place

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

To care for me and provide me with the opportunities to succeed. She was 16 and I have always, always thought of her with fondness.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Stating that you would do anything for her then giving her up doesn't sit right with me. I'm a first time parent myself

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For a week now. And already my main priority is that child. If I'm lacking of a job then I'll find one any type any pay

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

By any means necessary. I grew up from a bad child hood . No excuse to prove to your child that you can better yourself and then when push

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Comes to shove. It's the obligation of being a parent

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But it's just my opinion

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Better to suffer for doing good than to suffer for doing bad. God bless you

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Your child would understand

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 3

You made a wonderful choice. You chose for that baby to live.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

You made the right choice and she will have a good life because you did.

9 years ago | Likes 479 Dislikes 3

I was given up for adoption at birth, my birth mother was very young and was not prepared to have a child. She is plagued with guilt (1/2)

9 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 1

to this day for giving me up but words cannot express how thankful I am for giving me a better life. You made the right decision, too. :)

9 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 1

this is comforting to hear, I've always wondered about the other side of the story.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I'm adopted. I haven't met my biological mum, but I always take a few moments on mothers day to reflect&thank her, even of she never hears

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

You did what you thought was best for your child, hopefully they will understand the sacrifice you have made. Took me a while to

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

You're a mother. You did the most selfless thing. I kept my daughter, same situation as you. She's 15 and lovely but I struggle to connect >

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 7

With her.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 5

A mother does what is best for her children, even when it hurts. Happy Mother's Day OP, you're a great mom for doing what you felt was best

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

You did what was best for your kid, happy mother's day mom.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

thank you for giving both yourself and the child a chance.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Go easy on your 17 year old self

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

You are strong. You love her so much. Good job.

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You did the most logical and loving thing you could have done. You gave your baby to people who welcomed her into a stable and loving home.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Good mother.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

@OP. Tiny Octopus was adopted, and he wants you to know that most adopted kids grow up and understand without hate. Happy Mom's Day, you.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 2

My coworker gave up a kid at 17, they have lunch every Saturday now. You'd be surprised how well all parties involved can handle it

9 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 1

I'm so sorry you had to make such a difficult decision. Knowing something is right does not make it easy, does it.

9 years ago | Likes 51 Dislikes 1

Speaking as an adopted child, you did the right thing. Never question your decision. Much love.

9 years ago | Likes 27 Dislikes 2

How ironic, I just got a happy Mother's Day text from my 16 year old that I gave up for adoption just like this. I now have 4 kids. 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

If the parents who are raising her are doing the right thing, she will grow up to understand why you did what you did, & she won't hate you.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

I was placed for adoption in 1979, landed with a pretty good family. All I know is they were teens they were too young for that. You made a

9 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 1

Very difficult choice. I have an education a great job and 2 for babies I doubt I would have had the same opportunities had they not chosen

9 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

Fur babies

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Hello, adopted person here, and I'm going to say something the rest of the echo chamber won't. She will hate you, she will be angry 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

But she will grow. She'll realize she doesn't need to be jealous - and that's all it is, jealousy. She may have life struggles and have 2/3

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

a 'grass is always greener' outlook, but with time, she'll realize what you did was for the best.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

adopted here too, intellectually i understand, emotionally i still feel abandoned. though it doesn't help the woman that 'chose' me 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

disowned me as soon as i turned 18

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm in that situation... turn out I had a much more beautiful life with my adoptives parents. Met them again for 1st time few months ago. 1

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

And it confirmed me that they did the best choice.. at least from my point of view 2

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

The people that adopt kids are likely more equipped to deal with one than someone who's willing to give the kid up so not a bad decision

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 1

In my 30s, adopted. I have a thriving, healthy, joyful relationship with my biological mom & sisters. Thank you for putting the baby first

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

It isn't easy and I know you feel that pain every single day. You aren't alone and you aren't a villain.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It's okay OP. You wanted the best you could for your daughter, and tried to give her that.

9 years ago | Likes 40 Dislikes 2

I gave my son up for adoption in 2003. He has a great life & is happy & loved. It was a hard, but right, choice for me, too. I understand.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

*hugs* I can only imagine. Maybe you could write her letters letting her know you are thinking of her and store them away. 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 2

That way, if you guys somehow reunite one day, you can give them to her? 2/2

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

I was adopted. Never met my biological Mom but if I ever do, I would thank her for making the decision to do what she knew was best for me.

9 years ago | Likes 406 Dislikes 4

^^ this. I have never met my birth mother but if I did I would thank her for the life she had given me.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Adopted here too -- and I feel exactly the same.

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

Same. I have a pretty good life w my adoptive family, definitely don't have any ill will towards bio mom either

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

AWESOME that you are wise enough to see this. I'm glad you had adopted parents that raised you well.

9 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

v

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I would also be really happy if I found out that her life is better now and she has a family, @OP.

9 years ago | Likes 64 Dislikes 0

good things about their birth mother. I'd like to think that's what your child's mom does for your child too. 2/2

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I have several adopted siblings. My mom always tells them how brave their mom was to make that decision. They grow up hearing only 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0