ReagansLibrary
188962
3177
122
Aug 2, 2017 7:42 AM
ReagansLibrary
188962
3177
122
darkmyst30
On tried to use this trick to find the fucks I give. Still couldn't find any. :(
NotGayBottomAnyway
I already put a stocking over my penis whenever I masturbate, now I need another? I'm not made of nylon jerking off money!
JohnWickdidnothingwrong
This trick works great for picking up spilled weed, no lie.
DexioVexio
Find your penis, 1$.1$ find your penis
ImJustAPanda
Detachable penis!
DanteHicks79
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
technitium
i was like the 7th person to upvote this last night
WHATILEARNEDINBOATINGSCHOOLIS
That would make that vacuum suck dick though
hisdudenesselduderino
beshi
Well that sucks!
Honorarybanana
Or if you drop a bowl of weed on the floor
DanteHicks79
A solution!!
jangalangjangalang
Did this shit when i'd drop my ganja on the ground.
IStabYouEgg
...... fuck. So much wasted weed :(
ATLandNerdy
sirbartonslady
I was about to downvote yet another "Life hack" ... until I saw the last few words.
LaRosbif
Also works for getting the hamster out from under the sofa as shown by my mum.
whatwha
Found it
DuckTapeDude
that doesnt make sense but it made me laugh so heres an upvote
iShouldBeWorking42
It's a tip for hardcore gender-fluid people with detachable parts
PenisShapedPoops
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover, and my penis was missing again. This happens all the time.
SchwiftyGameOnPoint
Just the tip.
NonMayneStream
How does it not make sense? The pantyhose stop your penis from going all the way in.
SchwiftyGameOnPoint
Let's not kid ourselves, it wouldn't go that far, anyway.
cononinator
No you see the problem is it's so small it goes through the holes in the stockings
mahargthebear
Well played OP.
zmanz
Hmm, why would a (single) guy own or buy stockings? Oh...
SergeiBoobtitsky
I know you're joking, but if you hunt or play hockey in cold weather, pantyhose are great at keeping your legs warm without being bulky.
Rowee
Bc they're fab?
GuitaristDom
*being seen by nurse in Accident & Emergency* "but Imgur told me I'd be ok"
unencumberedbythethoughtprocess
Picking up spilt marijuana. Coffee filter for coke.
KSJKL
Not practical for long hair people
DanteHicks79
Instructions unclear, got dick stuck in vacuum cleaner
Alexander717
Thanks for the laugh. +1
plglbrth
I didn't read beyond 'earings' and nodded as if it were a great idea.
LegacyMuse
Oh, god, I'm not alone.
daguq
FYI, the sentence ends with ... "or your penis".
Ashpond
vorodar
For the record, you will also find other stuff, like crumbs, hair, dust, etc.
VirtualNaut
I only read the the first line and I was like that is perfect for picking up spilled marijuana.
RVME
Still a great idea!
nemoe
Ha It is so small it still goes through the pores in the stocking, but at least your mom still likes it
Mpisinchanga
I found my penis!
yourherovii
I'd like to add that I've proven this works when you accidentally drop your weed stash on the carpet.
FloppyBaconOfficial
Nope! Doesn't work! Lies! I still can't find it.
IWasDoingFineFarting
It slipped through stockings' tiny holes. Use the densest stockings you can find.
Buckbeak1486
So, hand knitted Scottish wool stockings?
ActualTttony
*disclaimer* Does not work for women or eunuchs.
LobsterBandito
Eunuchs still have a penis, it's the balls that they're missing.
ActualTttony
....aaand the hit dog hollers.
randomknave
You would know?
Radix865
And then you have Theon who has it the opposite.
Gayforbae
Wait, did he get to keep the balls? I thought he was a nullo
Radix865
Because just removing the shaft would leave him with his sexual desires intact, but nothing to act with.
theyregooddogsbrant
There's only one reason I get out the vacuum and my penis at the same time
thatwoodguy
Autosuck Autosuck Autosuck
Gayforbae
Is your name Stirling?
GUVMENTCHEEZE63
I use it to clean out the gunk from under my foreskin
theyregooddogsbrant
Gross! Clever... but gross
thatdudethatslonely
MT26sol
It's gotten dusty?
Jastaxor
You're gonna rip your dick off
DepressedHappily
*only
SuedeCaramel
Penis-Vacuum lightsaber dual! Oh yeah!
StonerCommando
When I was young, I was sooo disappointed I couldn't fit my dick in the vacuum tube. Then I thought it through.
theyregooddogsbrant
Small nozzle?
JackieTreehornProductions
[deep nose exhale]
squip
Vacuums suck for this sort of thing
CallMeAncalagonTheBlack
To find small things?
mustachefleas
I said dont disturb me when I'm cleaning my room!
laton
Forgot the "MOM!!!!"
ShadowZX
Doffy!!!!
clark6050
You'll rip your dick off.
SofaKingGreat
Only if it's one of those dysons with the motorized head
BIuesilly
Or your testicles like Sterling Archer
TwoShoos
WKUK represent
CatBlaster5000
I found my people.
CatBlaster5000
You want this vaccum, this is the one that sucks dick.
laton
So sexy: https://evacuumstore.com/images/category/medium/2152.jpg
enigmaburrito
Oh yeah...