AbercrosbyAndFlinch
17
4833
297
May 26, 2013 7:36 PM
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
17
4833
297
ylimey
making these memes took a lot of bravery. you have a lot of friends here.
interestingindividual
Please know it isn't your fault and it will get better. You are very brave to submit this. People will listen when you are willing to talk.
llli
-hug-
okaycrabby
you're not broken! hang in there OP. if you're not ready to open up to her or a therapist there are dozens of people on here too
bobsnotmyuncle
Been there too. Opening up about it is hard but starts the healing process and if she thinks you're broken, she's not worth it.
yhaner
Until I got to the end, I thought this was just a compilation of real confessions you found... not a single person. D:
Burd
<3 hope you can find help.
aguyuno
Damn, that bear had a fucked up childhood.
IAdventureTimeI
i used to play 'doctor' by sticking things in my sister's butt... first time i've ever actually typed that out
lyinginbedmon
Broken things can only be repaired once someone knows they need fixing.
PirateJesus
Hey Mate, similar thing happened to me, and facing it, & knowing its not you'e fault and using it to become a stronger person is the key!
PirateJesus
Send me a message if you ever want to talk about it, I faced it head on on my own, but I kind of always wish I had someone to talk to!
damootin
OP, start talking to a therapist. It will do only good to talk about it.
meandthedragonth
It must take courage to be able to write this here. You can do it.
jackbos
My mom died in childbirth, and my dad tried to kill me, mutilating my arm in the process. My sister french kissed me against my will. (1/2)
jackbos
It's hard to be a Jedi.
wagwaan
I ain't even mad.
GingerTheBeard
OP, talk to somebody.
RandomCleverUsername
You are beautiful and not broken. When you are ready you will say what you need to say to who you need to say it to. You deserve to be happy
NikolaTeslaWasCool
Baellach mate, we'll clear the way for you. If you ever need an ear, I'm here, for whatever that's worth. Never seen your darkness, but (1)
NikolaTeslaWasCool
I've got my own. Anything I can do to help, genuinely.
arthurdubya
Dude, you need someone to confide in. Try opening up to your girlfriend.
beemja
My friend.. Get some therapy don't suffer in silence. You can get over this!
TheChinamanIsNotTheIssue
Now that's how you use confession bear.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
That was actually what this started as... Got a bit more lengthy (and dark) than I'd intended once I'd delved into those parts. C'est la vie
twoheadedLuke
Salut OP! Vous êtes un homme très courageux! Je vous aime!
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
Uh... Voulez vous coucher avec moi, Frère Jacques baguette croissant.
thecup
The shame is the abusers to bear, not yours.
LaSabr3
I was raped by my teacher when I was 13. My boyfriend(gay) loves all the broken piece of me :) brought us closer. Reminder: Just live life.
SassySemen
I was molested by my cousins for 8 years. We still talk and hang out like it never happened... Our family doesn't know.
COVCREO
So is it molested if you didn't mind?
SassySemen
Not sure. If at least one of you think it's wrong then I'd say yea.
momomeow
I'm sorry. ;______; I know those feels. It took me years to figure out why certain members of my family could not sit in the same room...
momomeow
Skeletons in the closet. And refusing to acknowledge it... in my experience, only makes it worse. My aunt just doesn't come around anymore.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
Well that's downright horrendous. Even if you don't think you can/don't want to confront them, I hope you can find some peace yourself.
SassySemen
Shit... I meant cousin as in singular... still sucks but I realize I made it sound worse that it could've been... I made him stop though...
sugabee
If your girlfriend is a keeper she'll support you through this and be there for you. This is such a heavy weight to carry, please seek help.
Slackjaw
This. If she genuinely loves you, she will support your recovery. You aren't broken.
MyOwnHero
But don't expect her to save you completely on her own, go to someone who knows how to help professionally as well.
sugabee
You can't expect your girlfriend/boyfriend to be your therapist. The only thing they can do is support you, be there for you and listen.
iamthee
I would go one step further and say that you shouldn't expect her to save you at all. You have to be the master of your own problems not her
captainsciencebutt
It's also not her fault if OP's recovery process makes it too difficult to continue their relationship. Sometimes you need to fix yourself
captainsciencebutt
before trying to be with someone. I hate seeing the stable partner getting shit for the relationship ending in this kind of situation.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I agree, and I wouldn't put her through that if it got to the point where it affected her happiness. Still, good thing to draw attention to.
balthcat
(3) Which is where I would be like "Bitch*, that's my choice, not yours." (* gender neutral)
balthcat
(2) Oh, I couldn't keep dating you because I HAVE THE CANCERS and I wanted you to have a happy life!
balthcat
(1) Just don't do the thing people do in movies where they end things without even telling the other person about their burden.
cLOLe
I was raised in an abusive household, physically, not sexually. For a long time I was worried about the same thing you are, becoming (cont)
momomeow
I have told myself that I will never have children because the thought of treating another human being the way I was treated, disgusts me.
momomeow
Apparently this is fairly common in children from abusive homes (physical, mental, or sexual).
stchameau
Yeah, I'm stuck between never have a children so I won't do the same as my parents or have children and be the best fucking parent I can be
momomeow
I know! I've felt that pull before. I've been told I would be a great parent. I'm just afraid that I will slip, even once...
crazycatholic11
i'm in the same boat, but emotionally, not physically or sexually. It took a long time, but I finally found someone who's willing to help(1)
crazycatholic11
me work on my problems and become a better version of myself. I still fear that i'll treat my own children the way i was treated, but he (2)
crazycatholic11
assures me that if we work together, we will be good parents. I guess what i'm saying is, having someone to support you, anyone at all, (3)
crazycatholic11
can make a huge difference in your recovery and your perceptions of yourself. (4/4)
cLOLe
abusive myself. I'm 27, soon to turn 28, I've had many healthy lasting relationships, and have never once laid a finger on a woman. (cont)
cLOLe
We are not our genes. All you have to do is believe in yourself, and learn to control your anger (and... lust, I guess...). Be strong.
beffeer
Well said.. you be strong too
gmdave
.... We ARE our genes, but what you're talking about is not in your genes.
cLOLe
Only a person that's never had abuse in their family would think it's not genetic.
gmdave
Only a person, like you, who has not studied genetics would think it is genetic. You are a product of you genes PLUS life experiences.
Ilessthan3sonS
I'm so sorry OP. I unfortunately know exactly how you feel. I was molested by my little brother almost every night while my father just (1)
Ilessthan3sonS
either sat and watched or instructed him. For years I hated my little brother and beat him up all the time, but then I realized it wasn't (2
Ilessthan3sonS
all his fault. He was only 3-4 when it was going on and he was being mentored by my sadistic, piece of shit father. I'm really not even (3)
Ilessthan3sonS
sure if my brother remembers it. I doubt it. I was also molested by my older brother when I was 4 and by many other members of my family (4)
Ilessthan3sonS
I've never told anyone except my cousin/best friend and I have a fear that one day its all going to tear me down. It honestly feels good (5)
Ilessthan3sonS
to get it out though. I'm just scared that its going to keep me from getting close or serious to any man. So far it has and it really sucks.
satansgirlfriend
shes a bad gf if she thinks your too "broken"
tossingEwoksIntoLakesOfMethane
no. everyone wants to trade support with their mate but this is deeper than 'they werent supportive'. if she knows she can't deal then ok.
jusa
*you're. Sorry, had to be said :) @OP, hang in there and try to get help from a psychiatrist.
satansgirlfriend
thats okay my bad but yeah i totally agree
cutiepatootie
I disagree. What if she genuinely can't handle it? Doesn't mean she's bad. We are not taught how to deal with these situations
satansgirlfriend
true but you need someone to truly depend on..ive had boyfriends who truly cant handle some shit ive been through but my guy now..amazing
birthdayparty
Well yeah, "amazing" is probably a pretty apt word for SATAN HIMSELF!!! But seriously, it's wonderful that your boyfriend is there for you.
AssamLaksa
I agree with you. Furthermore, if she's not the one and they haven't reached a stable relationship yet, she won't be able to cope.
DanceComander
This. If you tell someone all this and they take off, they weren't even remotely worth it in the first place.
cutiepatootie
I disagree. What if she genuinely can't handle it? Doesn't mean she's bad. We are not taught how to deal with these situations
ForssFagerstrom
I think you are right. Whether people want to recognize it or not we all leave relationships because there is something we can't handle.
ForssFagerstrom
Criticizing someone for not recognizing they can/cannot deal with something as big as this is oversimplifying the issue. It doesn't make
ForssFagerstrom
them a bad person for realizing that someone needs more support than they can give. That's maturity in my opinion, whether it is nice or not
DanceComander
We're taught not to abandon people who need help and love. This fits under that.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I don't think she'd just up and leave me, it's more that I'm afraid of how she'll think of me after. It's not something you can brush off.
DanceComander
To be with someone like you. My bf went through a lot of shit when he was younger, and when he told me about it, it didn't change (2)
cutiepatootie
That's not true. Everyone is different, she may simply not be capable of coping with such things. Doesn't mean she's not compassionate.
DanceComander
I said compassionate enough. I didn't say she wouldn't be compassionate.
DanceComander
Okay, that's more understandable, but the same principle applies. If it changes the way she sees you, then she's not compassionate enough(1)
DanceComander
What I thought of him- and it helped me to understand how he works a lot more. But I definitely get the hesitation. (3)
SerialKillerJim
Im sorry i had to downvote this comment to get all your other comments in order
DanceComander
No worries
AwkwardOstrichGirl
I did this as well by upvoting only 2 of them, so we can just pretend one of the upvotes was from you.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I guess I'll try to work up the nerve sometime... Within the next few years... Before the wedding at least.
shadowex3
Some secrets are like worms, they thrive in darkness.
DanceComander
Was for them. You seem like a very strong person though, and I know you can do it. (2)
DanceComander
Please try. I've known a lot of guys in similar situations to yours, and the longer they went without telling their s/o, the harder it (1)
SerialKillerJim
well fuck your sister
funkjacket
both of them! Can I have their numbers?
Zaroth123
He already did. Haha, I'm a horrrible person.
DaddyMcMuffin
This is my favourite comment ever.
walkintotheclublikeLEEEEEEEEEEEEROY
You are the best kind of worst kind of person.
DunedainLad
I just chuckled a chuckle I didn't want to chuckle
SerialKillerJim
I feel way worse than you
SerialKillerJim
I swear I completely missed the irony of this comment at first....IM NOT A BAD PERSON
prettylittlenarwhal
no don't ruin it!
TheShowWhereThePointsDontMatter
cant... stop... laughing... :asdfasdf :DD
BumbleBTuna
If OP say's it ok to laugh then it's ok, but there is still a special circle of hell for us
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
... That's kind of the problem here.
TheChinamanIsNotTheIssue
TOO SOON
SovietWrench
I'm a survivor myself, and I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe. Sorry.
votedreads
just know that your a survivor. your not going to give up! your not going to stop, your going to work harder. your going to make it!
YouSuckHahaImJustKiddingYoureAlright
Damn OP. If you ever need a stranger to talk to I'm here for you bro.
Idontevengiveafuck
OP that comment is amazing
SerialKillerJim
Goddammit Im sorry that was an accident
AlongCameACat
Punctuation, my friend :P
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
Well, I laughed. And then gripped you tight and raised you from perdition when you were downvoted.
SerialKillerJim
Thank you...But seriously, get some help.
thedoctorsmisstress
Castiel <3
Rheios
Actually I can see that exchange playing out pretty much like that with Castiel. Like read "That's kind of the problem here." in his voice.
TimTim353
You deserve way more points for that commetn
TimTim353
COMMENT GOD DAMN WHAT IS WRONG WIHT ME TODAY?
TimTim353
AHHH WITH
AwkwardOstrichGirl
Your frustration is adorable.
RatherBeAHammer
I enjoy your frustration and username.
ActionLincoln
Buddy, you should seriously consider therapy
arekanderu
As if therapy helps. Burdening other people with problems you've had, only for them to pity you, is not helping the problem.
captainredbeard
I was molested by my neighbor when I was young. More than once. They moved away, and I've never told anyone. I was always too scared.
Honestidad
A few of those looked like normal people problems though, having a perfect life is in the minority of people.
gimmesometimeillthinkofsomething
Well, talking to us here on Imgur is kind of therapeutic I think. It's a step at least!
ShaketheWeasels
Seriously. It could have been any of us, but you are not condemned to it. Try therapy, try everything. Tell your truth, but make your story.
MySecondAccount
*Buddy, you should get therapy
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I had my therapy. TWELVE YEARS OF IT! IN AZKABAN!
HumpHump
I mean everyone is telling you to get a therapist, but therapy isn't always for everyone. There is always talking to a friend, loved one,1/2
HumpHump
2/2 or even a complete stranger.. Talk about what you want at your own pace and work through what bothers you one step at a time.
Stripeyhat
I don't even care if this is totally inappropriate. You're basically my favourite person on the internet right now.
IHatePuns
You've made me feel a flurry of different emotions in the past 45 seconds.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I should make a one-man show. "The Man, the Memes, and the Child Molesters."
AccordianAttack
It would be a serious Drama that spontaneously broke into stupid ridiculous unrelated references.
TheOwnerOfThisAccountIsStupid
I know this is all about molesting and stuff, but you can't break into me!
TheExpertBlackGuy
Azkaban a joke or metaphor?
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
Both. My humor is the prison, holding the death eaters of my past locked away from the public, until Gary Oldman esca... it's not a metaphor
TheyHidInTheDayAndAteGuavas
I find Alice Miller really helpful http://www.alice-miller.com/index_en.php
threebicks
OP, you are clearly smart. My advice: find a smart therapist and give them a merry chase. There are many types of therapy.May I suggest(1/2)
threebicks
(2/X) checking out Internal Family System Therapy www.selfleadership.org. The site doesn't really sell it all that well, but...
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
... No but I did try therapy after my dad passed. I could never open up to anyone. I'm thinking about trying again, it's just hard.
thewordsoftheprophetsarewrittenonthesubwaywall
hey man, be strong....
KarmAndCollected
Seeking help is not a weakness. Its the most human thing. Best of luck to you. We all have horrible stuff to deal with from time to time (2)
tanadarko
Therapy is super hard. But secrecy leads to shame. Making these meme's was brave in it's own right. Perhaps now you're ready to face it?
tanadarko
Good luck, OP. Your journey is difficult but I can tell you from experience... your hard work pays off. Life can be better. <3
KarmAndCollected
Doesn't mean you're a bad person because you have certain feelings/impulses. Your concern is of itself an indicator that you aren't (1)
skellious
try telling the therapist that you have things you want to say but it might take a few weeks for you to be able to open up to them.
umbreon26
I can't even imagine how hard this must be/have been for you OP. You deserve no shame, only love and support. And you can break the cycle.
getoffthedangroof
Good first step, saying that it happened at all. My husband of decades still doesn't know everything that happened in my childhood.
laestrella
I wish you the best of luck, I also think therapy would be helpful for you.
yhaner
I had to go through several before I found one I really clicked with. It helps to remember that they legally can't tell anyone else anything
KennaCupcakez
I know it may be hard, but know that you can take it as slow as you need to. You'll get through this<3
thegrounav
A problem shared is a problem halved
missgrilledcheeseplz
Hey OP, been there. I'm so sorry about all of this but maybe you should try again. Things might be different
oojeyboojey
Sometimes it's about waiting until the time's right for you - I hope you find a good therapist to open up to.
sushaichuck
I hope for your recovery and hope for peace after all these. here in imgur, a lot are willing to listen like me. one step at a time. *hugs*
sleete
It can take you years to trust the therapist. A good one will know this and won't rush you OP.
unixpunx
It's not for everyone, but I am a big proponent of MDMA for breaking through and opening up. It's often used for depression and PTSD, etc.
MetalJesus
We're here for ya, OP.
dontgooglegoogle
it's hard, but once you continue going, it helps. so much.
Flinkle
Same as everyone here says--definitely get some help. That's too much to carry around and try to deal with alone. <3
HueJanus
My father beat me nearly every day, caused me to young-onset Parkinson's and Dystonia at two years old, and caused me to be deaf until (1)
HueJanus
I was nearly 7. Outside of my family, I never opened up to anyone. I never needed to either, I had ways of dealing with it myself. (2)
HueJanus
I always thought I'd abuse any children I would have. I love kids, and could never dream of hurting them now. If anything, just look (3)
HueJanus
at it like this: You have PERFECT examples of how not to treat people, children included. You remember what it was like.
sushaichuck
im happy for you that you choose to see light amidst of all of it. thats how i see my parents as well: they are models of "what not to do's"
EverydayIsWednesday
I go to a therapy place that has puppies. (I'm 25, lol.) Maybe see if there is one similar in your area. (If you like puppies, of course.)
sleete
And of course, not all therapists work for everyone. Find the one that is best for you, you think you can trust and sees your needs.
ActionLincoln
Well, this is a good stepping stone. Finally opening up to anonymous people. Just remember, you're not the one at fault
HowUnfortunate
http://cdn0.sbnation.com/imported_assets/612434/its-not-your-fault.jpg
momomeow
I cried the first time I watched that scene.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I figured someone would post this sooner or later, I just didn't want to be rude.
momomeow
I cried for like an hour after watching that scene. No one had yet introduced to me the idea that maybe I didn't deserve the hell I lived in
mikkasina
What movie is this? :)
Voltair
I hope that you manage to settle the situation with your sisters. That's the thing that's worrying me the most; the people involved.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
I haven't really spoken to... uh. the first one. since she moved out after my dad passed. My other sister's recently reconnected with her(1)
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
as well as my mom and grandfather, but I don't have it in me to forgive her. Not just for this, either; she's a legitimately horrible person
Voltair
I'm not a therapist, so I can't say much. I just hope that things work out for you and your girlfriend. Good luck.
fl8rmaus
I moved away from all my fam. Some shrinks'll say to fix those relationships; I'm glad mine was 100% ok with me 1/2
fl8rmaus
moving far far away and building my new life. I'll ditto the therapy, even though I hated it and it was hard. 2/2
Voltair
Also, I would report her, but that's me. You'll do what's best for you, hopefully.
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
She was a minor (through most of it? I forget), and even if that weren't the case, I wouldn't put the rest of my family through that.
SpaybreStori
What if you print this out and take it to the therapist? Conversation starter? I can't imagine how you're feeling so I'm sorry if (1/2)
SpaybreStori
it's an insensitive approach. Sometimes something on paper is easier than speaking. I hope things get immensely better for you! (2/2)
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
"As you can see from my credentials, I'm from The Internet..." I appreciate the concern, and as it happens someone else suggested that I (1)
AbercrosbyAndFlinch
might find it easier if I can contact people through e-mail first. So it's something I'll look into, but I promise, I'm doing alright. (2)
NotAmused1001
If you can articulate your emotions so clearly and concisely into memes, you obviously don't have the turmoil generally found in a molested
NotAmused1001
youth. Do yourself a favor and sign off of the internet and get into therapy. For ALL of your issues and needs.