thegreatconundrum
277889
6346
306
Playing fetch
Oct 23, 2017 10:45 AM
thegreatconundrum
277889
6346
306
RCSpotz
EpicDiaBadAss
If she's passed out like that she doesn't need insulin she needs sugar. And call an ambulance.
MistressLyda
This. That one is dangerously wrong. Giving insulin to someone passed out from low blood sugar will kill them pretty fast.
Doomsday321
I only just realized the cold-blooded killer joke, anyone know if I can borrow their copy of "Am I Disabled?"
trinabeana23
I’ve seen that joke so many times until u pointed out the pun, I never got it! That should make u feel better bc u explained it to me
ShyNynaeve
#21
idonthaveabetterusername
#3 all day, or they just throw the money on the counter
CommanderWilliamTRiker
France is Bacon
TheDesimalPointIssuperior
dont get it
Elconquesodor
#23 This was so white I ate some kale.
FerbErrger
http://pausemag.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/asap-rocky-wacko-maria-goyard-a.jpg guess we don't like purses as much then
ScarletKittyCat
MrRandom314159
#10, y'know. Emotionally.
Batmannequin
I will never not upvote France Is Bacon
Blodgarmpls
Lmao I fell asleep around Asians and they drew dicks on me. I was the math guy
chiefwill
HorseTheBootyFiller...
Fieryatlas
oddworldabesexxodus
Kurt Kobain looks like the Statue of Liberty
ArianaGandhi
Jakethesnake357
What. The. Fuck.???
ilikejokes
ImLukeSkywalkerImHereToRescueYou
#10 perfec
myfirstaccountwasshadowbanned
perfecc*
rudejohn
I don't get that one. Is it a reference to a particular character, or just a general attack on the "we're too different" trope?
JustSayingYouHaventSeenMeAndBatmanInTheSameRoomBefore
Satire, but still too real.
papachabre
I believe it's from PBF: http://pbfcomics.com/
LordSlickRick
Perf***
glink33
+1 for Ron Swanson being a cunning badass
Asteroidrules
It's also funny to see Tom faint.
fluhatinrapper
I wear Ron Swanson long sleeve polos to work multiple times a week and I love them.
shiyal
Good morning Ron.
AJRDeck
#7 me at my players literally every DnD session.
phunkshun
#3 - Could be a cultural things. In some cultures you're expected to place the money on the counter rather than in the hand.
FuckingGilfoyle
Right? This one always bothers me. I think it's disrespectful to hand money directly to people in some Asian countries.
SendingThoughtsAndPrayers
Just thinking about the Soup Nazi's process for ordering soup.
13thDiablo
That last one hurt to look out. I just got a wisdom tooth taken out and the socket is dry.
sCarLoL
All my life I thought it's bon appetite. Glad i never had to write it.
VagisilToothpaste
Does anyone have a source for that cardinal pic? I've seen a few others, but always randomly scattered in something.
Galaad974
#1 - Ezekiel 25:17
GrouchyMarx
#4 I've read the Bible. There was no mention of scantily clad anime figurines. So hot gluing sexy figurines is acceptable in christianity.
ArvisJaggamar
Colossians 3:5
GrouchyMarx
But there's no listing of shit that's supposed to be immoral or impure that would include jerking off to figurines.
Elconquesodor
Dang, laser accurate.
Opportunist
Hot gluing? Is that what we're calling it now?
GrouchyMarx
It's a fetish. The act of ejaculating on figurines is called hot gluing. I've come across it (not literally!) on 4chan etc.
Opportunist
I should have figured (no pun originally intended!). So like Rule 34 but 'if there's a thing there's a fetish for it', I reckon.
RayGiIIette
Anybody get the bag thing? My friend is clueless
kambojah
It basically shows how all the casual and formal satchels are alike, whether they're expensive or not, aka a failure of the shop company.
trainsrule
#3 just put the change on the counter and watch their face of annoyance without them being able to say anything because they just did this
mcstreetz
and count it back to them real slow while you place each dollar and cent down on the counter.
trainsrule
Ive done this, either when they look like they would appreciate it, or they are rude and in a hurry
BannedbyastupidMod
Here's a story. I went to the dentist with a shattered Wisdom tooth, the dentist gave me several shots of numbing stuff 1/?
BannedbyastupidMod
2/? I couldnt feel anything, for 1 minutes, then I could, he stopped, gave me another shot, this repeated twice until I decided to
BannedbyastupidMod
3/? to lie and say I didnt feel anything, he pulled half the shatted tooth out, which he had to do several cuts, drillling, opening gums
BannedbyastupidMod
4/? he looked at my hands, ghost white, from gripping the chair, and gave me the most haunted look ive ever seen, got up,
BannedbyastupidMod
5/? and gave me a shot of some kind of red, gel, thick stuff, i went number for 1 hour and he finished. He never spoke to me again
BannedbyastupidMod
6/? and just had this haunted look on his face the entire time, wrote me a prescription, wrote me another, handed them to me, no words.
chiefwill
These are stale AF, I spend too much time on the internet.
Prometh3An
trigonman3
I'll take self-pwnage for $400, Alex.
chiefwill
Say what ?
UrsusDerpus
If you pass out around Asians, we’re a lot more likely to write shit about your momma raised a lil bitch in different languages
UrsusDerpus
And also maybe a recipe
Smeelio
If it's a good recipe, I'll take the insults tbh
Halleballe
The France is bacon...? The penny havnt droped for me...
MetaSomma
I'm confused why other people are confused. The explanation is in the first couple sentences
IAmJustTryingToFitIn
Presumably it was said by a man named Francis Bacon
jennym123
It's a play on words like "You can tune a piano but you can't tuna fish". It's not meant to make sense.
TerritorialRotbart
https://imgur.com/Dgo5Gpv
DaedelusMuse
Actually, the quote is from Sir Francis Bacon, a scientist in the 15th and 16th centuries.
jennym123
Shut up, NERD.
einahpetslol
I also tried to figure it out but it’s too early on a Monday morning..
DonnaNobleHasLeftTheLibrary
The quote is attributed to Francis Bacon. Sounds like "France is bacon" so the kid thought "France is bacon" was part of the quote.
DonnaNobleHasLeftTheLibrary
Saw it written down as "Knowledge is power - Franics Bacon" one day and realized his mistake.