upvotemypics
72510
976
21
May 16, 2024 4:50 AM
upvotemypics
72510
976
21
NotASpeckOfCereal
That's hysterical.
ivymantled69
HollerinAtTheVoid
The old-fashioned way of warding off "female hysteria"
blackstatic
Noice... real noice. 👌
morrighan42
IIRC that is for applying prostate ointment
MagicOrpheus310
That's.... A fucken bolt action dil-daaaww dude wtf...
MeeepMorp
A vibrator was one of the first patents using electricity registered.
DrDadJokes
I thought it was thermal paste seringe Arctic Silver
OneUniverse
Take me home country roads...
funlovinkrimenal
Paige?
woemsw
uden10
IYKYK
diezl97
I don't know, but I'd like to.
babes6us
Manual gear of grandma
YuffieK
It has a gear shift.
spontaneous9
* Joystick
Sehak5
UmmRonYourOn
sh17picker69000420
Is that a depth guage?
levelfivedetentionblockaa23
WildWeasel76
Steely Dan.
nutmegonyourdoodle
Ha!! You think there’s -no static at all? If so -Ricky don’t call that number. This is the -I want a name when I loose -model.
AdmiralJohn
SarcasticComment
but it's family tradition
TheBunnyPants
Why does the business end look smoother in the second picture?
FabulouslyTiti
Some good ol' fashioned pole polishing. ♥
ojisama
Combination of the potato having worse focus in the second picture, and due to being further away, the compression artifacts could also be covering more details
KainLamond
Maybe it did some business between the two pics...
yesmaybenot
Probably because it was tried to see if it was working after taking the first picture.
Frostycopper
What was its advertised use?
WarlordPipsqueak
If i recall it was either an aid to help with supository insertion. But i might be wrong. I'm sure it had other uses.
yesmaybenot
It says 'happy home", so logic is for home use.
Frostycopper
There are lots of things that can be done at home.
yesmaybenot
Yes, but they didn't have so many choices then. It was either homemade or happy home made.
UnattendedDeviant
We were tougher back then.
STGxDante
The design is very human
UseTheSource
Discussion on Reddit doesn't find consensus: from juicer to Recto rotor to churros maker to... the obvious. https://www.reddit.com/r/whatisthisthing/comments/627ntr/only_know_its_of_asian_origin_any_ideas/
HeadJamistan
Nut cracker?
0570
Looks like somesort of fancy sliding bolt to me, especially since it can be locked into place easily
BishlamekGurpgork
It doesn't really make sense as a dildo, though. The whole retractable thing doesn't make it smaller or more discreet or do anything for sex.
crasemana
So it has more than one size?
BishlamekGurpgork
When r/whatisthisthing can't figure it out, we have no chance.
laacis2
i kind of suspect a chicken/turkey baster. Maybe you fill it with spices and put it in the oven with the chicken
CreatureFromtheBlackLegume
That would be a turkey stone, which is also in r/whatisthis
battlebetter5772
Bet it smells like Grandma's cookies
bonaroo
"I bet it smelled like Grandma's muffins" was right there
Flopdong
its spelled "cootchie"
PballQhead
Broadway2
Grandma probably died off lock jaw and tetanus from using that dang thing
foreverinchains
You don't get tetanus from metal or rust.
The anaerobic bacterium that causes tetanus, Clostridium tetani, lives pretty much everywhere. If its endospores get into a deep enough wound, away from the presence of oxygen, it can quickly spread and cause tetanus.
Symptoms of tetanus usually appear after around 10 days and start with muscle spasms in the jaw, which spread to the rest of the body and can be severe enough to break bones.
Even with treatment, roughly 10% of cases are fatal.
foreverinchains
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tetanus
DaSauceSeeker
"Happy Home"
brettTvBaron
Happy wife happy life.
Harbltron
Ride wife, life good.
nutmegonyourdoodle
Good ride, wife good.
HaPB
Happy spouse, happy house
JCBalance
Happy clam, happy fam
ExecutorHideo
I subscribe to the "Mildly irritated wife, entertaining life" myself...
FenrirsDaughter
The only reason I know you aren't my husband is he uses the exact same username for everything. And also he says "slightly annoyed" instead of "mildly irritated."
nutmegonyourdoodle
I too considered this was my beloved.
ReturnOfActionCheese
Is that galvanized?
beansofthunder
To protect it from its moist environment
Whatdoyousaytoanicecupoftea
For her pleaasure
DrasticBastard
Looks like aluminum.
n0n53n53
only the best pure lead coating
IamTheRealD
Cause grams was a squirter.
alcamar
Don't want it rusting in you....er on you.... Rusting
stayingalive4life
battleofhastings1066
Maybe chrome?
eleanorugby
The time has come to
SoraHjort
It looks like it may just be some form of oxidization. There are plenty of things that can cause an galvanized appearance on metals, like pineapple juice.
themeatree
...or other acidic environments
LucidPariah
Better galvanized than lead!
Boatsntoes
What do you think the galvanization process uses?
trigonman3
Zinc, of course.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galvanization
Boatsntoes
You are correct. I thought it had lead with the zinc but apparently we stopped that a long time ago. “The answer is that modern galvanized steel does not contain lead. However, in older production methods, especially before the 1970s, lead was sometimes used in galvanizing. This practice has been phased out over time due to health concerns.”
LSAH
On that note, apparently severe lead poisoning is what killed or indirectly led to Beethoven’s death.
charhan
Was it anal lead poisoning?
LittleRobot71
https://arstechnica.com/science/2024/05/beethoven-likely-didnt-die-from-lead-poisoning-new-dna-analysis-reveals/
Chawzilla
And it's bolt-action
cusbuster
Lock and load.
PervertedTango
fredhoffman1968
ww1
profloyo
“Ping”
MatthewJohnsona
"Reload!" *Kcha-thunk*
yambond
The 4 inch Punch.
Gruesslibaer
The 8mm Mauser dildo has been widely copied since its introduction in 1898.
willpostanything
kaching! like M1 grand.
Gruesslibaer
The M1 Garand is not bolt action.
isetprettygirlsonfire
No one needs a full auto assault dildo
Zeus541
I think they're called Sybians
NecroNikolai13
Don't let Paige hear you say that
koops
LetsEatGrandpaCommasSaveLives
Hey you don’t speak for all of us
TheBunnyPants
But muh rights!
realpersonjacob
Out of context quote of the day
Shinydudenexa
Coward
silentflute
You can have my dildo when you pry it from my cold dead ______.
petkorazzi
But how do I get off the 30-50 feral hogs that run into my yard within 3-5 mins while my small kids play?
medimr
What if you run into one of those bears I've been hearing so much about recently?
TunnelRat13
No no, the full auto is after you've had 30-50 hogs run through your yard.
SalmonTheWise
Second amendment says something about bears.
FabulouslyTiti
I mean, I know some bears who are interested in this, but they might look a bit different than what you're expecting. ;D
md22mdrx
BadAssFreakyGangbanga
Kinky Kelly and the sexy stud!
Brings back memories.
happywalker
six or more dildos is banned in texas
3KnucklesDeep
The Texas penile code
foreverinchains
Where's their definition of obscene?
farfie
Wow. You are assumed guilty by this law if you possess 6 or more dildos. That sounds very unconstitutional.
happywalker
could you imagine the revolution that would be started by people stockpiling dildos?! :-P
SheepySleepySmuggler
So you're saying there's a market for semi-automatics then?
stercusmoriturussum
nutmegonyourdoodle
Woody pecker!
SheepySleepySmuggler
Isn't that full auto? Or is it not a hammer drill?
AreYouABadPerson
Definitely has a giggle switch installed.
ThingsThatDontJustifyGenocide
Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/whatisthisthing/comments/627ntr/only_know_its_of_asian_origin_any_ideas/
Due to the holes along the side, the best guesses people came up with was some kind of melon-juice extractor.
DamnedIfYouDo
"No Pa! It's a Mellon juice extractor!!! I don't even know who ordered it!!!"
sanri0
One credit card receipt for Swedish-made dildo signed by Grandma Rose.
WynnCreek
It's for extracting a kind of 'juice'
BishlamekGurpgork
I mean, it doesn't even really make a lot of sense as a dildo.
Harbltron
not with that attitude
EDDDDDDD
Or lack of courage.
rbudrick
So you cock (lol) it back and you can trigger one thrust, or what?
yoyo42
Then you put another shotgun blank in. It's only one thrust each time but it's a doozy.
nutmegonyourdoodle
mercyPandaRunner
I'm doubting this is a sex toy. It's probably some kind of obsolete kitchen tool for making cake glassing or something like that.
rbudrick
Happy home on it? Flared base? Nah, this is for meat poundin.
mercyPandaRunner
More likely shit pounding.
rbudrick
The shit is surrounded by meat! Lol, but considering the brand name, this was intended for home-makers who were women back then. So maybe sometimes butt, but prob not usually.
mercyPandaRunner
No, what i mean is that this wasn't likely a sex toy. The spring loaded thrust function makes no sense as a sex toy. It is made to break up/loosen up constipation shit plugs in ones arse. Or, if you believe the advertizement for the Rectorotor, for all kinds of issues that are relieved by sticking a mechanic metal rod up your arse.
I think constipation was a much bigger problem back in the day, due to various factors. People were less aware of the whole "stay >
mercyPandaRunner
Best guess i have seen is that it is some kind of anti-constipation device.
bezobzira
Recto rotor
mercyPandaRunner
Recto. Rotor.
nutmegonyourdoodle
That’s RectoRooter, that’s the name and away goes trouble down the drain..