Texts From Super Heroes   mini dump

Apr 19, 2017 10:44 PM

Execfist

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223637

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4933

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Source: textsfromsuperheroes.com/

I don't know why but I keep forgetting to check on these guys. Some new ones I've never seen. Thanks, @OP.

9 years ago | Likes 62 Dislikes 1

"Yeah, I realized I could control him because he was a shark" killed me for some reason

9 years ago | Likes 122 Dislikes 1

Fun fact deadpool pays for his avengers team by himself

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Winkey-man is my new favorite superhero

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Thank you, Imgur, for randomly jumping right back to the top precisely 1 second before I clicked "Load 28 more images". Again.

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Omgosh I dont want these to end

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

"Ninja Whalers". So, Deadpool ran into Daud.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hhhnnnngggg <3 you're my current favorite person.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Lost it at knifey-clawy

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

+1 This had me actually laughing.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Beast: "I'm not allowed to have fun !?" lost it

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

In Astonishing X-Men, Beast has a ball of yarn that he uses as a psychic trigger to regain control of his body.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 41 Dislikes 1

So how about them sandwiches

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

All gold. Too bad there was no Booster Gold.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Yes Cap it was Facebook that got us

9 years ago | Likes 110 Dislikes 2

clearly

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

"Punch every nazi, every day of the week" - Rogers 2020

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Tbh, it's a great medium for spreading bullshit fake news and propaganda, so it probably had some impact.

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

It's also lowered our IQ. Hey, we should introduce Bruce Banner to Facebook!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"mini dump"

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

I didn't know how much I looked forward to Hawkeye meeting Yondu in the MCU until now.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Yes but Capt, people are arbitrarily calling anyone a Nazi who doesn't agree with their ideology and then using that as a justification 1/

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

for using violence to suppress free speech. "Oh, well punch those people then."

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Yeah, for some reason I'm pretty sure it would be the Anti First Amendment thugs who Cap would be punching.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Except Captain America would be over 90 years old, not 70. The war ended 72 years ago.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#6 Is fun in a Deadpool kind of way, him knowing about the character's rather bad first appearance.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

What's a "mob dive"?

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

A "dive" is a crappy restaurant. In this case, it means it's a dive which is a front for the mob.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I read the last one with Mark Hamill's voice.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Except that Santa is real in Marvel comics and Iron Man has non-metal tech prepped for when he fights Magneto. (It's happened before)

9 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 1

Does he switch his name to Plastic Man during those fights?

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

No, he uses like carbon fiber nano bots or something like that. Its been a while since I've read it.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No, Plastic Man is a trademarked character of DC.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

why's luke saying santa does not exist? dudes a powerful mutant in the marvel universe.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

FLYING MURDER STICKS

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

But not online. That's important.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

who has more money, bruce or tony?

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Parker

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Tony has more money than Bruce. Sauce: http://time.com/money/3950362/richest-superheroes-comic-con/

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Commenting so i can come back later. Thanks have a +1

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The answer, as always, is Scrooge McDuck.

9 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 0

Tony has more but Black Panther is the richest being the king of the wealthiest, most technologically advanced nation in Marvel.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

I thought the most technologically advanced nation was Latveria.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Probably Bruce if I had to guess. Pretty sure he's owned like half of Gotham before

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

so he dosen't protect the city he protects his back yard?

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

This is how he legally gets away with vigilantism, because he's just applying castle laws.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Does it matter which imaginary man has more imaginary wealth?

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 3

Yes.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Fine. I read ONE infographic claiming that Stark had more wealth.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

anyone know who makes these

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Santa is real though, he's a mutant too

9 years ago | Likes 26 Dislikes 1

And one of the most powerful oddly.....well actually no that makes sense.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

wtf when did they give Santa an infinity gauntlet?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He even appeared in a special issue of the latest Ghost Rider

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Since when is juggernaut not a mutant?

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Since always. He gets his powers from something called the Crimson Gem of Cyttorak.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Will have to pull out my X-Men comics. I was pretty sure he was a mutant, cause X could find him, among other things.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Well, I finally looked it up, on comic Wikipedia article least & I guess ur right. Never heard that before. Always thought he was a mutant.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

guess the movies aren't Canon, but when kitty pride leads him into the room w/the mutant who cancels other mutant powers, he loses his power

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Another reason to disown Last Stand: it confuses people who are first reading about the comics version of Juggernaut. :p

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Well, in my defense, I was reading these in the 80s, but I somehow missed this detail.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm not sure Cap would be for punching non-physically violent Nazis. "Every time someone tries to win a war before it's started.." and all

9 years ago | Likes 38 Dislikes 7

Yeah, and real orcs wouldn't ...

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah, I don't think one of Marvel's most moral heroes would seriously injure an unarmed or non-violent person.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Eh it's kinda debatable, since he might mean every nazi that uses free speech to advocate hate and intolerance.

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 3

Not really. The Nazis rose to power by labeling people's speech too dangerous way more than advocating hate. Look up the Reichstag fire.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Mean? If he's okay with it, I'm guessing it's more his affinity for vigilantism evidenced by his actions. The quote's about acting from fear

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 5

Well Chris Evans has gone on record as 'wanting to meet' the guy who punched the woman in Berkeley, so :)

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

To congratulate him for defending himself and treating a woman as equally as he would a man?

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

He's not okay with it. There is literally a comic of that exact scenario.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

No, just Nazis and Neo-Nazis. You can hate someone, but advocating for their extermination is not OK. Unless you're talking about the TSA.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 3

Even then, you can use your words back. Freedom of speech isn't just for people we like. That's Nazi thinking right there.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Freedom of speech is fine for anyone other than Nazis. We decided that 80 fucking years ago.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's not true by any stretch of the imagination. Saying people you dislike don't deserve free speech is something Nazis would agree with.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

"I'm cooler than you'll ever be". Truer words were never spoken. I want all the Black Panther movies

9 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 5

Plus I'll never forgive Marvel for forcing black widow and fury to be second string to captain white bread

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 16

The world needs Captain America

9 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 1

The world needs a superhero with zero understanding of nuance or subtlety because his greatest super power is always being "right"?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 5

... is that what you saw in the marvel movies?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In the marvel movies I saw a man who's first and last thought to every problem was "Punch it in the face"

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0