anlyin
203341
7074
238
Aug 8, 2019 2:00 PM
anlyin
203341
7074
238
SubtleOrc
#4 is the best use of that meme yet
TygrF
Wayne Bruce cowls his don to battle Kerr Joe!
huxleyy
EmmaJean231
"Unseasoned chicken wing!"
spongepat
Grandma's couch ( or throw ) pattern is just fucking CRAZY !!! And ......I'll please have the donuts the gym dudes don't eat.
tarataqa
just reposting everything from yesterday, huh?
squirrelfartsy
That's all this account does.
Wooie
Cat tax is about to drop a hit album
powderedwigs
“You unseasoned chicken wing” haha
Snitchesgetstitchesbitches
This dump was a terrific dump. I WAS having a bummer morning. Thanks, pal, for cheering up the afternoon.?
mg7374128350
#13 the plants are ( from the left corner to the right) Maple, ash, spruce Oak, poplar, beech
Monkeyfighter
https://www.yelp.com/biz/stillwater-barbeque-abilene?q=free
jennym123
#1 Real talk. The guy on the right is rocking those yoga pants.
yamigenesis
welcometothedanktrix
I would watch the shit outta this
Goldenteckel
LiteralVampirePotBellyGoblins
I love ancient memes
sanaujiram
Uber cars must be 2008 or newer. I, like many of you, looked into how much one could make as one
SophieClockwise
I regret to inform you that you will never be an Uber car.
sanaujiram
I already am the car. I am a Tesla Model S P100D. I became self aware at 11:31:57 US Eastern Time.
Iwouldbenick
kerouazy
*unseasoned chicken wing* my new forever-insult
Chpgmr
Discovering a library. Man that hurts.
NachoPete
The husband in #7 has fine communication skills. We all understood his point.
TheBiggestDinosaurYouHaveEverSeen
Don't dream catchers catch good dreams and drip them onto you while you sleep?
kakivara
No you're thinking of serial masturbaters.
heyey132
Dreamcatchers attract good dreams you uncultured point-monger.
EyeSpyABreathtakingPerson
Homie has facial hair in both pics...it's a straight up flex.
TheFastpaws
I was thinking more of the guy who is going to cheat on you or leave in the marriage while you are pregnant.
VeryBerryMelon
But ManBats name is Robert Langstrom?
seanfish
Yeah, I was picturing the office not getting the joke because they all knew this.
Samsquantch82
#5 is kind of like tattoos of anchors that say "Don't sink!" or something. That's what they DO. THEY'RE FUCKING SUPPOSED TO SINK.
DukeDarkwood
I feel "Stay grounded" would be a better motto for an anchor tattoo. But who, besides sailors, would get an anchor tattoo?
Samsquantch82
White girls.
imadethiswheniwastooyoungshootme
For the 80 year-olds get a free meal thing, just bring in your parents ashes and watch it get awkward
uffda0
TheOptionToNot
This is true, how often are the names of these plants jammed down your throat with a catchy song?
DerangedMagpie
Bud.... weis....er
MsHoneybadger
I think I can name a few trees: maple, walnut/pecan, spruce, oak...not sure about the last 2 maybe elm and cherry...
asplenium
I can name the genera, but any ecologist will tell you knowing a tree’s ecosystem services is more important than its name
KinkoTheGoblin
Knowing what a burger is made of is more important than its name too.
DungeonMaster69
You can tell that one is an aspen to it... 'cause the way it is
AllisonD9000
bada ba ba baaa... it’s a oak leaf!
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
"Leaves of three, let it be"
uffda0
Right here^ all you need to know +1
doyourworkidiot
I'm working on the second line. "If the vine is hairy, that shit's scary."
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
Line three: "Little red berries won't make you merry"
WellThankYouCaptainObvious
And why do only leaves of trees count as plants? Nobody cares about shrubs and herbs.
GhostofBillyMays
Tbf he used super popular brands with some leaves I've never seen before.
GlassPHLEGM
To be faaaaayah
uffda0
To be faaaaaaaaaair
SyeedAli
You unseasoned chicken wing. You absolute walnut.
komododave
You seedless watermelon.
Proxxy0
.
RADICALFREEDOM
You bowl of loose washers
claven666
You blithering mooncalf. You gudgeon of 4 elements. Quit your gladhanding and tomfoolery
BURNtheZEPPELIN
You used q-tip.
abigbiglove
You fly in my soup
hamadele
Pickle you, kumquat
PeskipiksiPesternomi
Who are you calling a cootie queen you LINT LICKERRR
MarioBoon
you pesto!
XxJackOfTradesxX
You egg.
IAmACyberneticOrganismLivingTissueOverEndoskeleton
You unpeeled corn cob
Drunk3nm0nkey
You absolute fucking mango
Slingsby
You absolute fucking moon unit
sorryfriendiwasyourghostdave
You absolute fucking toaster oven
ItsMISTERPerfectCell
You absolute fucking cabbage.
GreaseMonkeyOfLove
Im outta here. Stay fresh cheese bags!
4TheSDMB2C
That still makes me giggle in the store, I can't not hear it in my head in Dairy. Then I mutter it to myself to the sure delight of others.
pajasa
Monkeyfighter
#48
bugeyetex
Wow, stellar find.
uffda0
Omg Karen
BluePeaSoup
What an entitled bitch.
MrNecrophile
I know i shouldn't be, but I am seething with rage.
Monkeyfighter
Nah, you’re good. It takes a special kind of trash to complain about a tip jar for free beer.
whoawhatacoolusername
But, but she's from Minnesota...what is this treachery?????
tocfanke4
I have no idea what a CB is.
Gibbatron
Cock block?
AliCatDarling
Choosing beggar
floopdawoop
Cunt bag.
DukeDarkwood
Choosing Beggar. Been on the rise here lately; I didn't know last week.
trigonman3
Citizens Band
tocfanke4
Breaker breaker 19er
Muffdiver9
#9 I'm pretty okay with someone getting excited about public libraries, they don't get enough support.
HighKingWarrior
I mean, that person did just discover the library, and if that person's followers are unaware, they might discover the library as well.
HighKingWarrior
https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/029/623/cover1.jpg
Shpadoinkleman
Pretty much my thought
uffda0
Idk what public library let’s you rent 50 books at a time tho? Seems like madness
sooligan
100 items at a time from mine.
2shortplanks
Ours does. No limit.
Opportunist
MINE!! m>
DerangedMagpie
Have you ever tried to read ALL of the Horus Heresy? I'd need to go back for more.
seanfish
Ours does 20 per card. Family of 4 = 80.
HiddenSanity
Mine had a 12 book limit, but removed in for some people with good history, like me. Shame it cut down on my exercise.
Mutamn
In 1878 phones didn't have a number pad. You picked up and told the operator who you wanted to talk to, then they connected you.
zeroexistence
TIL
TheUrsid
Thank you!
Ihavemytowel
In a old copy of the anarchist cookbook & it recommended leaving 1 public phone off the hook to disrupt a portion of the phone system.
AntaNce
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/NaturalMilkyGiantschnauzer-max-1mb.gif
lncorrectGrammerNazi
AlphaKenneyBody
Party line
5exyPanda
Stop killing the joke Karen!
minifeebas
i figured it would be something like this
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
Thanks, LeighA
MEL357
Perfection.
AntaNce
https://d3h6k4kfl8m9p0.cloudfront.net/stories/BvbgRBKmFzigAaJbFL4UyQ.jpg
DukeDarkwood
I suddenly don't feel that old anymore; mine at least had a dial on the front. Tiring on the finger.
AntaNce
Hated all those high digits. 444-244-0009 ugh.
hetriedtokillmewithaforklift
Give me number 9
IPlayWithFire
Yes and they literally connected you by plugging a wire in sockets to link person a to b
alirah
To this day I don’t understand how that works
InsomniaOlympic
If you have two cups and a string I'll show you
sms001
6 cups and 3 strings?
KinkoTheGoblin
More like 3 or more cups and one string.
tarataqa
It's not magic. They literally connected you by plugging a wire in sockets to link person a to b. That's it.
SidneyHarbor
Well depending if it was local or not. If it was a longer distance, they connected to the exchange. Basically like modern routers, but ppl.
Sesshiro
They make the really long wire from phone A connect to the really long wire to phone B with a short wire.
Sarpedan
and they did this until one operator sent all calls for an undertaker to her husband, the other undertaker /1
Sarpedan
in town patented the automated telephone exchange and killed her job
CreatureFromtheBlackLegume
Undertaker killed the telephone *
WilliamHuskerAdama
The quests in which people are happy to partake, in order to once again undertake.
JustLettingPeopleBeWrong
Intriguing. Source?
Sarpedan
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Almon_Brown_Strowger
JustLettingPeopleBeWrong
Many thanks :)
Mutamn
He invented it all on his own? Must have been quite the undertaking.
Hairarse
He only did so after using his undertaker detective skills and worked out why the line was dead.
IambeHeqit
Oh my God. Underrated comment.
Zooooool
Nice
hxchip
moonsaves
Maybe so, but the situation was grave. He'd hit a dead end and was getting stiff competition. It was either this or kill his business.
Zooooool
Bruh
Mutamn
DukeDarkwood
When it looks like a "missed the joke serious reply" but actually elevates punning to a new level. +1 to both of you.
oscillatingdogfan