It feels like a shitty thing to do.

Sep 28, 2016 10:03 PM

boopboopityboop

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It feels like a shitty thing to do

The backstory, if anyone cares, is that we've been dating 4 years and living together for 2. Sex has never been great, for various reasons. He always comes after just a minute or two (yes we tried everything), and he has a strange attitude regarding sex. He has a hard time talking about it, I don't see him naked much, he's very self conscious in bed, always asks "if I'm okay", etc. It's strange because we're both 25 and healthy, and he's a good looking guy. We even saw a therapist once (I pushed him to go) but it didn't change much.
.
Now, we have sex every month or two, I usually feel sad afterwards. We've talked these problems over extensively. We love each other dearly and we're best friends, but we aren't sexually compatible (in my opinion. Somehow, he's perfectly content).
.
I'm totally devastated. I feel like I need to go through with the breakup and just move on, but some family members of mine have told me I'm being selfish. My mother even said "what if he lost his legs? would you leave him for that too?" So maybe I'm just a shitty person.
---
*EDIT* Wow, thanks for all the advice, wasn't expecting that. This is what I'm getting:

85% of you think sex IS important and I should fix it or GTFO
14% think I'm a shitty person that never loved my partner
1% think I need a strap-on

What more can you expect! Thanks imgur!

**EDIT 2**
Based on all the PMs I've gotten, there are a lot of people going through someone like this. So know that what you're feeling is valid -- sex IS important -- and when people say "if you really love him/her, you'd make it work", just brush it off. That's not sound advice. Relationships are much more complicated than that.

i broke up with him yesterday. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. At some point, I thought he was the one. I thought I would marry him.

Our relationship changed, though. We're still best friends... but in the end, I prioritize sex more than he does. And that's fine. It just means that while we may love each other desperately, we're probably not sexually compatible. I haven't slept in like 48 hours and I'm afraid I'll never stop crying but hey... I'm doing my best to look out for myself. It's a work in progress.

I'm by no means an expert, but if anyone going through this needs someone to talk to, I'm happy to lend an ear.

One simple question, are you okay with not having a sex life? Because you need to answer that to have your answer.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

There's no reward in this world for settling for something you do not want. John Mellemcamp said that. Set him free

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Anti depressants ie paxil did the trick for me. Have him take 1 hour before sex. You will not regret if he is willing. Or take daily :)

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Maybe see if he is ok with you getting sex somewhere else? Have your cake and eat it too? Or let someone else eat it?

9 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 8

Look up polyamory. It's hard for some people, but possible. I had an asexual friend who let his partner 'roam'.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 3

Being incompatible in bed = losing legs. Got it.

9 years ago | Likes 58 Dislikes 6

Exemples bro, it's never gonna be the same, the hiperbole it's always gonna be the shit with examples

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

hes probably into some kink and doesnt want to tell you

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 3

I broke up with my girlfriend of 6 years cause she had sex like a dead fish. We also maybe had sex once ever 4 months. 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

I'm now with a girl that wants it more than I can handle. Its pretty amazing

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

And soon she'll write a post here "I'm breaking up with him because he can't keep up with my Needs."

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 5

Don't feel shitty for being patient and trying to make things work. Much less for wanting sex. As a guy, all sympathy. Just go. Cry. Bonk.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

If you aren't happy, move on. Don't let people make you feel bad.

9 years ago | Likes 52 Dislikes 11

For real. Forever's a long time to have shitty, mediocre sex with someone every other month.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

He might have some medical problems affecting him. Even if he is healthy as you say, he should talk to his doctor about this.

9 years ago | Likes 50 Dislikes 0

+1. It is abnormal to have a low libido at 25 yo. It is what we call a red flag in primary care (need to investigated).

9 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 1

I'd love a guy with low to no libido. If I want to get off I can do it myself. I'm actually sick of sex.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 9

I have a pretty low libido, but I feel like it might help if I stop watching porn. I don't do that everyday either, but I feel like 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

it would help if I could regain that excitement from seeing a woman naked, if you know what I mean. 2/2

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sexual compatibility is a big part of a relationship... I see nothing wrong here

9 years ago | Likes 43 Dislikes 9

Most chicks don't orgasm from intercourse anyway - teach him good oral technique.

9 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 7

intercourse alone, not a majority, but with intercourse and clitoral stimulation they sure do

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

I doubt he is content. He's probably scared of constantly disappointing you meaning he's "happy" with sex infrequently.

9 years ago | Likes 173 Dislikes 1

One of the cyclical side effects of "poor performance" is anxiety on following encounters, leading to worse performance.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Plus, your own expectations prevent you from getting into the act. There is too much pressure to perform on him to actually do it

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I could see this being the case. He doesn't want to lose you, but this kind of situation just doesn't fit. Love is not a relationship. /1

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Love can always be there, but a relationship is its own unique arrangement. You're not getting rid of love; but you both deserve fulfillment

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Fulfillment is a bar you set yourself. If you constantly look for 10s in all categories, you'll be unfulfilled most of your life.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

You're 100% right. Still, it's no undoing of happiness to seek qualities you're attracted to. Fulfillment can exist with or without a 1/

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

relationship; but, if she's gonna be in a relationship, she wants SOME certain things--otherwise, there's just no point.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I mean, break ups happen. You can both find people who will be better suited to your needs. Don't feel the need to settle.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I tried making it work with a girl that wasn't into sex for years. I loved her desperately and told myself there were other more important 1

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Things. A relationship shouldn't be all about sex, but it is a huge deal. It didn't work out in the end for that reason. Then right after 2

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

We broke up sue started fucking everyone. It still hurts. A lot. My sex life is totally in the drain because all i can think about is her 3

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Getting fucked by some adage that doesn't give 2 shits about her. Can't even jerk off anymore.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Damn, I'm so sorry to hear that. Sounds like this was recent?

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah. Its been happening over and over again for the last 6 months. She hasnt been very nice lol. I just ended it for good a week ago

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The shittiest part is that I still miss her dearly. Even though she was such a dick

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If you WANT DIFFERENT THINGS it's a completely understandable thing to try to find someone who is more compatible. It's WHY ppl date 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Before they marry the first person that they fall in love with 2/2

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Sex therapy. Keep seeing a therapist. I'm a 10 pump chump myself unless I'm drunk/high and really comfy with my partner. Record is 15min

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I also have to think about unrelated shit and keep up the dirty talk. Sometimes I even have to get weird cause I won't know what to say 2/?

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The problem is OP sounds set in her decision already. Further, if they had issues together, therapy might help but it rarely does when it

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

is one partner dragging the other in saying "you aren't fucking me right, now Dr. Love here is going to fix you"

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Haha. Well, it was my idea, but I didn't drag him anywhere.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Like Morty I might stutter like "uhhh yeah I'll put my leg up like this, you like this angle? You like when saddle you up like this?" 3/?

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

What works for me is doing everything possible to distract/desensitize how good it feels cause that's why I bust so fast. 4/4

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

See a sex therapist. Keep trying at it. Look up premature ejaculation. Ask a Dr. Sounds like a wonderful relationship apart from this.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Be gentle but above all HONEST with him. You have every right to have a happy, healthy, and fulfilling sex life even it it's not with him.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Is sex really that much of a deal breaker? Would/Is he bothered by you masturbating? I mean if sex really is the be-all-end-all 1/

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 3

Of the relationship then yeah break up with him. Before you break-up figure out what you want out of a relationship, if he meets all the 2/

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 3

important criteria, and you break up with him anyway, then either you don't know what you want, or yes, you are that shitty. But if sex 3/

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 4

Is high on the list of important criteria, then yeah maybe breaking up is the way to go.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 2

Yes, it is a deal breaker. If your partner smoked and you tried to help them quit with therapists, patches, gums, etc. all while provding1/2

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

Support along the way, then you have done everything you can and the person is simply not going to be able to be good for you. Thats 1/3

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Exactly what is happening here. She has tried everything to make it work but he refuses to go outside his comfort zone for her. Leave him.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

It might, indeed be a deal breaker for you. But OP's answer is the only one that is relevant. He clearly has gone out of his comfort zone.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So wait, he's went as far as going to therapy, but he's refusing to go outside his comfort zone? I don't quite follow your logic there.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

He has, to a point. He went to therapy with me (once), and he took salsa dancing classes with me (Idk, I thought it might help)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I do, however, feel as if I've done a lot more. I bought a sex toy, new sexy underwear, planned dates, scoured the internet for answers...

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sex means different things to different people, and if it's a necessity for you in your relationship it's selfish in the good way--

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

It IS important to prioritize yourself to a certain extent; martyrdom is not actually healthy!! That being said, I think a sincere convo--

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

is recommended FIRST. As others have mentioned there are reasons he could be struggling as well (Vit. D, depression, etc...)--

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I have a good friend who had this problem with her husband for over a year, and was beginning to have her own depression because of it--

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Turns out he had a Vit. D deficiency (hah.). It was corrected, now no one is D-Deficient ;P (haha!). Just one example! Point being--

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

TL;DR--You need to do what's best for you, BUT, it may be worth a thorough sincere conversation and medical work up!!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You should get a strap on and show him what you want

9 years ago | Likes 704 Dislikes 6

.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

9 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 0

Second this

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Haha maybe he would be into that!!

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

pegging! woo!

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

I love this. I love this gif usage. LOVE.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Not a bad idea at all. Maybe even try some cybering where the laws of physics and human biology are irrelevant.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Problem solved :D

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Being pushed to see a therapist is probably one of the reasons it didn't make much of a difference.

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 6

Yes all of this

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Speaking from experience, some people just aren't into sex. I know I'm not. I've tried, and it's just not something I enjoy, so I tend 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 1

to have sex as seldom as my partner will mind. I just don't enjoy it, I don't think it's that great, and it's... blah.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

I'm always curious with people in your situation, do you actually orgasm? name implies male, so gonna assume yes.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Actually a girl. And I've never orgasmed from intercourse, but biology's biology, I suppose. If I masturbate I orgasm like anyone else.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Hmm, well that's not uncommon, but masturbation's not particularly pleasurable either? or at least not enough to be worthwhile?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Eh I'm a male and I have no desire for actual sex. Been there, done that; wasn't all that great.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Do you still have an urge to? If not you might be asexual. I am. Opened my eyes.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

I think you should tell him basically everything you wrote here, make him understand exactly how much it effects you.

9 years ago | Likes 1108 Dislikes 8

I think if she has even pushed him to see a therapist than she pretty much has told him how she feels

9 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 3

The question is how long new habits (in his case) can be sustained. Sex every month or two seems deeply ingrained for a 25 y/o.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I agree. But if u do, make it as a team. Guys often feel pressure to be good and that anxiety just makes things worse. Not fun sexy time.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

+1, but anxiety after YEARS is coming from somewhere within him, probably not related to sex. Maybe some developmental trauma idk.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

As someone who just got out of a 4 yr relationship, if you're willing to break up over the sex, there may be deeper issues being overlooked.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 3

You're right. There probably are. But if he's not interested in figuring out what those issues are... Well, I can't make him.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Exactly. I broke up with my gf because I was moving 800 miles away, but the bigger issue is that I wasn't willing to stay for her.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You're not wrong, but these comments are hilarious bc if it was a guy saying this it would probably be downvoted to hell.

9 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 7

All too true

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 4

Sadly that is true, when it's a guy that says sex is important in a relationship it's often viewed very differently

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 4

That's because women can get away with laying there like a dead fish most of the time and the guy still gets off

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 10

"I need a more fulfilling sex life." pretty much covers it.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 2

Ultimatum gurl, being direct and honest is best

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 6

Ultimatum is code for "I don't love you for who you are, I like you for what you do"

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

No. No ultimatums.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

*affects

9 years ago | Likes 68 Dislikes 4

Yup

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Well this proves it. I have no fucking clue what the difference is lol. BRB gonna go write my evs paper

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Affects cause effects.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Effect is the noun. Affect is the verb. At least in this context.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You are affected by an effect.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It's my second language, I tried :p

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

How many men have sex with their gf/wife maybe three times a month and they put up with it. They shouldn't but they love em, so they deal.

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 8

My bf bitches if we skip a day. I'm not allowed to refuse because he gets whiny and pissy. I can't wait for my period.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 3

That's not a good guy. Your partner should at the very least try to seduce you, not force you. You been with him long? If you don't mind

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

9 years lol. Know his family, am the aunt if his nephew. He suffers from depression so he uses sex to try and alleviate it.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

At least get me the freaking vibrator lol!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I feel like I shouldn't have to "deal" with that when I'm 25 and not even married with kids yet. But I'm probably just a bitch

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 3

Not at all. Breaking up will open the door for both of you to find better suited partners. Ain't nobody got time to "deal".

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Nope, you're entitled to you're feelings. If you feel this lack of intimacy negatively effects your relationship that is a fair reason to 1/

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Choose to not spend the rest of your life with someone

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

If you only do it once a month, of course he's going to last 2 seconds. Try 10 times a day and he'll build that stamina up

9 years ago | Likes 175 Dislikes 7

@op or teach him oral ya know

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

This. When Im getting laid only once a week I struggle to make myself last. When Im getting laid everyday I can keep going as long as I like

9 years ago | Likes 53 Dislikes 4

No not this. Clearly the guy has issues beyond sensitivity

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Its hard to say, considering we only have one side of the story, and its a short story at that

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Masturbation does not count or does not occur? Honestly curious, PM me if you do not want to talk in presence of our little family here.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I find masturbation helps with the feeling of being 'over full', but doesnt help deal with the riot of sensation from actual sex.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It's not going to work if he has a low libido. You can't force someone to get horny. Speaking from experience.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Yep, the more he gets off in one day the longer he'll start lasting. 3 x 1-2 hours gets most men up to 20-30 min. It increases after that.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I would honestly get so bored if it was 20-30 minutes! 2-5 is perfect for me

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Clarity Edit: 3 times in 1 to 2 hours...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The rest of her freaking post explained that is not the only problem. He obviously just has a problem with sex. She needs to move on if it 1

9 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 6

Yup

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Is making her this unhappy. @OP you're not a bad person and at this point you are doing the best for both of you to move on.

9 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 5

Which is caused by his low stamina

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You have made efforts to improve the relationship for both of you and he refuses to make any changes for you because he is perfectly happy.

9 years ago | Likes 137 Dislikes 29

Moving on is not selfish at all.Both parties need to be fulfilled and happy for a relationship to work.Your mom is just thinking outdatedly.

9 years ago | Likes 76 Dislikes 15

Agree. You are trying and if he isn't as well, don't settle. You will resent him- sounds like you already are. Comparing this situation to

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 3

Having his legs blown off isn't the same cause that's not controllable. He can talk to u, continue counselling, communicate what u want etc

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 3

Yeah, you're right about that. She's even said "Most women would love to have your problem, so they don't need to have sex"

9 years ago | Likes 39 Dislikes 4

That sounds legit... for the elderly. Sure is easy to dismiss sex when the drive isn't there anymore.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Ohhhh wow that's just fucking horrible mindset. Shows you how unhappy she probably is with her marriage and sex life.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 3

....wtf xD

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

I hate that argument. Let's just generalize everyone because we all have the same wants and needs and then make you feel like shit.(sarcasm)

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Fuck that noise! If a woman has the right partner sex is awesome. I feel sorry for woman that think the way your mom does.

9 years ago | Likes 36 Dislikes 4

Me too :\ I don't ask for details but I'd guess my parents haven't had sex in a few decades. I don't wanna be like that damn

9 years ago | Likes 28 Dislikes 2

You do you boopboop. Sexual compatability is important. If he's not willing to change now, he never will. Maybe he has low testosterone?

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 3

For sure. Sorry this relationship may not work, but there will be a great guy out there for you.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 4

That's so depressing

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 2

I feel bad for the guy. He probably knows he is shit in bed so he actively tries to avoid it. But hey it your life. Gotta lookout for no.1

9 years ago | Likes 405 Dislikes 25

In that case, he shouldn't avoid it, practice makes perfect...

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Yeah I bet his self confidence is in the gutter

9 years ago | Likes 65 Dislikes 2

Even a therapist couldn't help. Either he didn't open up or He's just built that way.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

If he knows they he should improve. He's also looking out for himself. By only avoiding it, and leaving her hanging

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Maybe he legit has a medical problem and he feels shitty about it. Has he been to the doctor at least?

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Nope. And I think that might've helped -- maybe he has low testosterone? But if he won't go, I guess I'll never know...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

He could be absolutely shit at sex but still make some magic happen with mouth and hands. Idk why this isn't happening for them

9 years ago | Likes 140 Dislikes 4

It's not the same though :(

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

That's what I thought !

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Maybe he's not good at that either :(

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 4

THIS!!

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

"Magic with mouth and hands" doesn't count as sex?

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I thought a lot of people would consider foreplay, idk I don't have sex much

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Errr. Okay. Would explain the amount of sexually frustrated people.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yes. I'm as confused as you on that one.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I don't really understand the issue. If he is against manual or oral or toy stimulation, then maybe I can sympathize with OP a little. (1)

9 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 1

I know there are shallow folks who have specific sexual demands, but if both partners are reasonable, sorting it should be trivial.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

It's not just his premature ejaculation. It's his attitude about sex overall.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 3

So he doesn't offer to help you in other ways? My fiancee was like this for the first year or so and during that time I felt like that (1)

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

until we talked about it. Then he started using other methods to satisfy me and it helped our relationship immensely. He doesn't have (2)

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Unfortunately, at this point, sex has just gotten awkward and tense for the both of us.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 2

Marriage isn't about everything being right.Its about both of your abilities to deal with what's wrong together. 4 years and not married-

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Can confirm. I used to be that kind of guy. Sex was never fun. Just an immasculating and embarrassing experience. Often turned down /1

9 years ago | Likes 35 Dislikes 2

'invitations' because the shame I'd feel about myself was far greater than the pleasure sex brought me.

9 years ago | Likes 28 Dislikes 0

sooo, did you change that? Im pretty sensible and can never last more than 5-10 minutes.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 1

I have had a uniquely different experience

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Oh yeah, it's better now. Can last way longer depending on mood, sobriety, etc. Full disclosure: I take pills to combat it.

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

is it medical pills? I just tried a Cockring but it did nothing except making woody feel like trapped and hated the feeling.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Glad you found something that works for you!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I think the average time a guy lasts is about right in that time span, actually.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

The trick is to not care what others think about you. I'm a piece of shit, but hey, I've gotten laid!

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Anyone cum fast after not having sex for over a week or two, try having sex every day or get him to masturbate. Also foreplay helps alot!

9 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 1

this!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

@OP read this!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I tried :( This summer we had a serious talk about my dissatisfaction (lots of crying) and I told him i want to have sex every single day

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So we could work on it together. We had sex twice that week, and once the next. Then it fizzled out again

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The big warning sign, for me, was that I didn't feel like trying anymore. I could initiate it with him, but I just don't want to :(

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. That really sucks. I'm sorry OP.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But honest question here. After 2 mins, did he keep going after he came or did he stop after?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And, when I leave a woman because sex, I'm a chauvinist pig.

9 years ago | Likes 186 Dislikes 51

I feel like it's mostly about the way you deliver the news that makes you a shitty person or not

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 2

Oh no, there are plenty of whiners saying she strung him along. They fail to realize that actual relationships take time and effort.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Shut the fuck up

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I know plenty of guy friends who have left because the sex wasn't good and I never thought that, sex is super important in any relationship

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 4

I feel the same way!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

What are you even talking about?

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 5

starfish aren't an endangered species anyways

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

When I read the story I thought if you flipped it on its head, and have a bloke complaining of this people would be mad.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

you should see my inbox.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ain't that a bitch, an only men can be sexist right?

9 years ago | Likes 34 Dislikes 10

Sex is a super important part of a relationship. It's our intimacy with each other, something good we do only with the one we love.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 7

If that fails, then it's just as bad as not communicating, not sharing, and even more devastating that fighting

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

Because you can still love each other, but can't be intimate, can't express it in the primordial instinct that is to breed.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

But regardless, he has a point. In just about any situation, if you inserted a male into OP's scenario he would be the scum of the earth for

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 3

leaving a chick who didn't fuck him enough.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

That's cool dude, make this about yourself.

9 years ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 82

You must be new here :)

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 6

Wow you really got torn apart for that one! That'll teach you to point out stupid comments

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 3

He's not, it's double standards, If a woman leaves a man because of bad sex it's ok, but if a man does it he's a pig. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

9 years ago | Likes 38 Dislikes 13

No one thinks this. It's the approach of how it's done that matters.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

These aren't the same. They've tried to work it out. Where others just say "meh" and move on, that's shallow.

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 28

No idea why this was downvoted

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Thanks. I didn't think I was attacking anyone.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

True, but my statement is still correct.

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 4

OK I will get so downvoted but here goes: you're a horrible person because you kept dating him for four fucking years are you FUCKING crazy

9 years ago | Likes 154 Dislikes 55

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9 years ago (deleted Sep 29, 2016 2:42 AM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

I agree, that's just messed up. Poor guy is not going to trust women for a long time after this.

9 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 8

Clearly the sex each month or two is recent. Perhaps she could cope with shitty sex if more frequent as it had been...no need to be mean

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

I cant help but be mean.Stringing someone along is one of the worst things you can do. Especially your own boyfriend/girlfriend. Four years!

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 13

Did you completely misunderstand what I said or chose to ignore it?

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

"stringing someone along" and "trying to work through problems" are two totally different things.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 2

It's not "stringing them along" if they actually love them and thought it could work.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

I was with someone for almost 3, despite us, basically, not having a sex life. But i loved his company...i shouldve ended it sooner, 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

So youre not wrong in your statement. I guess i was hoping that the desire would deminish, but it didn't (he was also pretty selfish. 2/2-3

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

So that didnt help his cause. Sorry for rambling. 3/3 (for real)

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Speaking as a guy who got dumped after four years and the girl lost her virginity days later at a party, THIS. If it's a problem, fix or end

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

She couldn't fuck you then break up with you? Damn bro. Sorry.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I ended up losing it to her anyways two months later, and I *really* regret it. I just wish I wasn't led on like I was for so long.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I agree, i understand her problem, but this could have been over in just 2 years, why did she had to develop her relationship even when 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 11

She knew it already was gone to shit and she didn't like it?

9 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 9

Sounds like she really loves this guy. Imagine breaking up with someone you really love just because sex is sub par. It's not that simple.

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

I get the impression Imgur doesn't really know what love is, since everything is reduced to "be naked when I get home" and touching butts.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I think it would also be interesting if we could see the ages of the people who are replying to this post.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I thought the sex could get better, I really did.

9 years ago | Likes 31 Dislikes 6

Don't feel bad, my story's similar. Girlfriend for 4 years. Sex got better recently. She's got issues and we BOTH worked at it. You tried.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

Make him pleasure you first

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

You know after a while sex becomes one of those "things that won't change just because you're in a committed relationship." (1/2)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 3

If he had a particular habit/lifestyle choice that you didn't approve of, would you have waited years hoping that it would be resolved? (2/2

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 3

Yes? I've been married for six years to a procrastinator who is finally realizing what a problem it is. Sometimes self-awareness takes time

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0