ArtByTMD
110542
2091
35
No glass shattering = probably fine https://www.instagram.com/artbytmd/
Nov 25, 2020 6:08 PM
ArtByTMD
110542
2091
35
No glass shattering = probably fine https://www.instagram.com/artbytmd/
TheCobb1
One of my orange cats has learned how to open doors. We lock the doors and setup the vacuum outside the door now.
Pokegeologist
My brother let the little cat in last night and woke up to it wrapped around my heaf furiously licking my scalp. Freaked out a little.
WeirdStealth
If I hear something like that from my cat while I'm sleeping, I normally just yell at him to quit and let me sleep
emispGifPilot
My cat dropped a moth, still flopping around, on my face in the middle of the night. Charming little asshole was trying to feed me.
battlepants
*hurk hurk hurk* - well, maybe the dog will grab it before I get to it.
Icommentandpostmypets
I usually yell "bro, what the fuck!", and she sprints into the room to try and act cuddly and innocent.
therealbessica
I still check on em... but I'm overprotective
BrazilianThunderPanda
Literally what happened when my house burned down.
SgtFriskers
A few days ago we heard a bunch of weird scratching noises at the door...our dumbass had gotten his claws stuck IN the door knob...idiot.
Kbantar
I'd the opposite problem with one cat. She got upset if I stayed up too late making squinty glaring expressions till I turned off the light.
Kbantar
She also slept with me as long as I did.
FartPoweredPogoStick
2 am..."SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU ASSHOLES!"
Klaaism
Said the cat.
Imadethisaccounttopost
My little bastard was chewing threw electrical cords his first week, he did over a grande in damage in his life time.
IsItBrieUrLookingFor
You still wake up?
NOtoAnastasia
For real. That's a rookie move.
aristera
I remember being woken up in the middle of the night by a cat knocking over an entire CD tray in my room. I don't have a cat.
complimentpin
4am: my cats: Ok, about time to chase each other around the apartment for no reason.
IlluminaBlade
How do you keep new TV's safe from cats if you aren't in a wall mounting situation.
ArtByTMD
Trick question, you don’t
emispGifPilot
You can buy a special clip that anchors your tv to the cabinet / shelving it sits on. Buy from same place that sells tv’s.
wyatt8740
I buy tube TV's instead.
ArtByTMD
I’ve had a cat knock over a tube tv before
qwertdeep
A friend of mine was stoned one night and heard a loud bang upstairs. He and his house mate got terrified and fled the house and drove /
qwertdeep
Around the block. As they panicked they called the police and they sent some cars over straight away.As they were waiting for the cops they
qwertdeep
Remembered the bud on the table. So they mustered up the courage to go in to hide it, they didn’t hear any movement whilst they were in the/
qwertdeep
House. Police turned up moments after they hid the bud, the search showed no one was in the house. Turns out their cat just fell in the bath
johnvictor
It's when they're quiet you should be scared. Prior cat almost strangulated herself playing with string around a chair with cross sections.
secretoaster
I throw a pillow at the general direction and go back to sleep
MoozerBoBoozer
After being the proud parent of multiple cats throughout the years, I still am the first half of this comic.
Alighierian
More like: "Goddamnit... they knocked that thing over... I'll deal with it tomorrow..."
minqapoc
That's the one i go with the most. "That is a problem for tomorrow-me."
ArtByTMD
Also accurate
BusterH
An ex of mine’s cat once woke me up at 3am by releasing a duck it had caught and injured. There was blood and feathers everywhere.
AlcoholicsAnonymousBYO
"Let's see how the new human handles this!"
qyrriqat
1318th night owning cats: "If you don't get down off of there right now, I am going to wring your fuzzy neck in the morning!"
qyrriqat
(1319th morning: "Aww, aren't you my cute little kitten. Here's your breakfast!")
GinOClock
I didn't sleep at all the first night. I was so excited that I had these little animals in my lonely apartment all of a sudden.
craycray606
ArtByTMD
Aw! They look like Maine Coons
craycray606
Yes they are Mainecoons
ArtByTMD
I love Maine Coons, they’re so sweet
craycray606
craycray606
They’re also big as in big boned. They grow into large frames. My Mainecoons are 25lbs each and eat...a lot
furoesmailiph
DarkBusterBaron
Do not sleep with babies you could smother it in your sleep.
Mellayellafella1441
That's just adorable!
SomeCrazyNerd
I would be worried about squeezing the bird accidentally
The701
etopsirhc
not always fine. i woke to "BANG ROWL HISS" vertical sliding window fell, cat's tail caught between the top and was hanging by it! 1/2
ImAfraidYoureAllPsychosSoIMadeThisAccount
Our kitty got stuck to a bug trap by the furnace.. BANG BOOOOM BANG! I thought a racoon had come down the chimney!
mentallychallengeaccepted
Racoon santa is a movie that needs to happen
iamthisguy247
Yeah I was lucky that I changed my mind one night and decided to investigate the noise. Thought everything was fine until I saw our indoor >
iamthisguy247
NKato
That night your cat definitely had no chill.
iamthisguy247
Yeah I took the screen in to be fixed (rescreened?). The lady took one look and was like “I’m guessing you need the extra strong pet screen”
FrenchPudding
My sister got lucky and found our cat almost dead outside, convulsing, some asshole probably gave her rat poison.Always follow your instinct
BaklavaMatatas
Funny I only got woken up my my cat throwing up hair and food. On my pillow. Next to my ear.
boopityboopboop
My dog did the same
sackccnt
SAME. but twice, inches from each other so I touched both when I moved my hand around.
boopityboopboop
Nooooooo!!!
literally you when you woke up.
wyatt8740
Uh, I'm just curious; how and why would people intentionally poison cats? I see people talk about it a lot but google gives nothing useful
etopsirhc
i feel like they're the same kind of ppl that would walk by a friendly dog and just shoot it. (never go to live leaks, just trust me)
FrenchPudding
To some they are pests, they poop in gardens and stuff. Where I'm from it's common for people to run over them or poison intentionally
wyatt8740
poop is a fertilizer so I still don't get it.
pedrotbear
Antifreeze. Tastes sweet; deadly poison.
etopsirhc
2/2 sacrificed right arm to hold cat up relieving pressure. and pulled up the window that fell. cat is fine, but god dam that was a scare.
AlexVanPutten
Cats are so fucking dumb, I love them so much
NuttierThanAJarOfGoobers
What a horrible thing to wake up to. Poor you and kitty.
MinxyJinx
I have a very deep scar on my hand from a similar scenario when I heard a commotion and my cat was hanging by her tail
Cartoones
Same thing happened to my cat years ago. Somehow got into the closet and jumped, got tail stuck on the coat rack and was hanging for hours /
Cartoones
By the time we heard her whining and found her. Luckily all fine somehow but very scary and intense
ArtByTMD
Wow that sounds...intense
etopsirhc
Oh it was. I was a nervous wreck for days, and my cat's still scared to go up in the window. Cant blame her though
HandoB4Javert
I would hiss too
TomGrom
I would rowl as well
theliquidsteak
Wait what happened to your arm?
etopsirhc
yeah it more of just use it to prop her up biting, hissing, clawing and all. scratch marks galore, but nothing serious.
FBKatB3tadotcom1
You know that garden shears are available? Then you could have wiser cat, and a lucky cats tail for your keyfob
ArcaneDryad
I know it’s a joke, but it’s too sad to imagine
DarkBusterBaron
blackPLaGuE208
ZeLittleRev
Or "what the fuck did they break now?" Grumble walk to the kitchen to find one in, yes IN, the trashcan while the other swipes at the lid.
UWAGAGABLAGABLAGABA
I had one knock my 50" tv over. Fun sound
theguywiththevoice
You have cats without anchoring your t.v.? I bet you just put up a Christmas tree without guy wires
UWAGAGABLAGABLAGABA
I don't put up a Christmas tree. I don't participate in the commercialist holidays.
theguywiththevoice
Because clearly that was the point that I was making.
theguywiththevoice
Side note, Christmas trees are Germanic pagan, not commercial Christian.
KrazyKatLadyStarterKit
Oh no
ZeLittleRev
I'm TERRIFIED of hearing that sound.
UWAGAGABLAGABLAGABA
Luckily, it only scratched the screen a little bit. Totally fine, otherwise.
throwaway99x
Well, there's your problem-two cats.
Topstar
yup that's the problem you need to keep them in squads of at least four
ZeLittleRev
I guess so. Off with one of them!
HolyHellJezebel
Exception is when you're dead to the world and you hear that first "hurk" then instant 1000% alert. "Not on the bed/rug!!!!" Goddammit.
minipancho94
got my cat to learn to puke on the vinyl/tile by gently holding him there when i could. wasn't able to reinforce it enough to stick though
ArtByTMD
It’s always on the bed/rug
CT1space3DX
Ah Ha..the real cat owners have entered the room
md22mdrx
They seem to RUN to carpet/rug/hardest thing to clean in the general vicinity. No puking on the tile or anything! Oh no. Can’t have that!
DranksAndDragons
My hypothesis is that they feel yucky and want the softness and comfort of carpet instead of the hard and cold wood/tile
Debaucherousgeek
My cats go to bed when I do. Sleep through the night, get the zoomies when I'm at work, or just get home. ?
DarthZartanyus
Mine too. Just one cat, though. People will doubt but having the kitty on the same schedule as me is pretty great.
DrunkenMarineBiologist
Debaucherousgeek
?? the key is some good play time before bed. Wear em out. ??
DarthZartanyus
You just gotta get 'em on a schedule. Start with set mealtimes then work up from that. As with any training, consistency is key.
DrunkenMarineBiologist
My cat has set meal times, she just sleeps off and on throughout the day, so she isn't tired enough to sleep all 8-9 hours I do
DarthZartanyus
My cat doesn't sleep the whole time but he stays in bed with me only getting up to get a drink or use the litterbox then he comes right back
DarthZartanyus
Also, I rarely get 8 hours of sleep so that might be part of it too, haha.