viddles
181639
4044
129
Tool expectations
Nov 2, 2017 12:08 AM
viddles
181639
4044
129
zipsline4
byohzzrd
Next Tool expectation: The cropping tool.
MisterLemons
Can confirm. "Drain plug isn't coming off. Get me the six point 14mm and breaker bar. I'll thread this pan before I let this bolt win."
Scarecrow241
And the final tool is the drill because you sheared the bolt clean off
TinySupreme
Alternatively: Busted Knuckles, More Busted Knuckles, Sheared Bolt.
SailorBOB
Slugging wrench and sledgehammer: "You thought the darkness was your ally..."
YeastInfectedWhiskerBiscuit
"pulls out blow torch" I didn't wanna hurt you, but you asked for it...
yzrocketman
20 lb sledge says
GoodEveningThisIsWhatAButtDoesPBBPPBBTT
Breaker bar... use a breaker bar -_-
km9v
Is the last one the Harvey Weinstein of ratchets?
iScreenshotGifsAndUseThemToComment
Black then white are all I see.
QualityPotates
Mehhhhh69
The world is hostile, so impersonal....
remalle
That's what I was expecting when I read "Tool"
hwatL4bloopy
i've broken a breaker bar before.
diphenhydraminehcl50mg
Torque mother fucker, do you speak it?
Shoutrr
and the "we're the fuck did i put it" 10mm socket
Cheomesh
Mine is somewhere in my wife's car's engine.
DresdenPedalTimpani
The only thing I’m expecting from a tool is a new album
lostbrother18
"fuck it getting the sledge hammer"
DiabolicalCats
Only to find out it's a lefthanded thread.
mobiobi
Cutting torch is the last stop on this train...
geiokami
Nothing like a good cheater bar. 4+ foot steel pipe
TheMedGeek
Regardless of how big a tool they are -
R0b0t1c
is there one to crop the image?
Nccoffee
Seriously, how the fuck is this on the fp. Minimal effort please.
viddles
Oath
MyName4Wine
https://imgur.com/fZO2ca6
ColourBlindMillwright
Then there's the long one with a pipe. Come loose ya bastard! *Tink*! Falls on face.
BLACKHAWK6901
As someone who just broke the last one on a bolt and then grabbed the 6ft cheater pipe and 1in socket set.. when one fails, go for broke
CallMeVoodoo
Breaker bar more better. This pic is wrong.
Mrman1988
Underrated comment
ford5of5
More better, like skookman af? aVe watcher?
ShapesIndustries
Came here to say the same thing. Why have that much torque if there are teeth in the way? Give me straight metal, baby!
GoodEveningThisIsWhatAButtDoesPBBPPBBTT
lonevolff
Then the impact gun...nuked from orbit
Cheomesh
Worked a job years back.Putting the final bolt into one of the machine covers using impacts.Sheared the last one off.Very bad day.
Komer
Was that one ugga Dugga or two
CKOD
Nah, impact may be howitzer, 3/4" impact a JDAM strike. Nuked from orbit?
Hydraulic torque wrench.
lonevolff
I like your thinking
Dinnerbird
*impact wrench noise*
exenos
Only the 3/4" beast. Everything else a breaker bar will beat.
Jotun615
nah the three quarters only good for the little fuckers for the big jobs get the 1 inch
TheDrunkenWrench
I dunno, my 1/2" takes off lug nuts with ease that you need one mother of a bar for. Spend the dollarydoos on a good gun, worth every penny.
SpringToMyWinter
The one tool you don’t have: the cropping tool.
CapitalNick
*BOOM*
halborski
Cropping by Helen Keller
SatoriEnlightenment
Those silly aliens.
Falos
No watermark, no vertical video - ah, so close, and yet so far.
Coder1999
lol!!!!
chuiiiwuurrgg
I'll get the ice...
anjunaspeak23
I was praying for his comment so much!
WillJeSuis
Mehhhhh69
Or the tool album.
KezziKun
Soon TM.
MysticSorcha
ChicanoBatman
Is this really a thing? Never heard of it or am I too old for young jokes?
SpringToMyWinter
I meant he should have cropped the black part above and below the actual image before posting it.
imeatingpizzaandfuckit
You forgot the “60 year old fucker with hands made of steel who laughs at you for the cheater pipe and turns it with his fingers”
ford5of5
*74 year old. My Dad too.
Melanisia
*72 year old. My dad.
TGWolf
82. My Grandmother. She can also produce a 10mm Socket on request.
truthsmiles
No lie: I used to work in auto maint and an old guy named "Frog" could break a pair of Snap-on pliers with one hand just by squeezing them.
Klaxun
Don't fuck with Frog.
truthsmiles
Definitely not. Shaking his hand was like trying to palm a bunch of hydraulically-powered bananas covered in rawhide.
Iwanttostayinbed
Man he must've been great at finger banging chicks
WrinkleStar
God damnit ya made me laugh
TwoCoats
Cheater pipe - "did I stutter?"
samsonguy920
Pneumatic drill socket - "Done."
kLitMa5t3r69x420
We need leverage! Get me a 5 foot pipe! STAT!
CooleytheAussie
Is a cheater pipe what us Aussies call a breaker bar?
DrantonMason
Nah a breaker bar is just a long wrench, a cheater pipe is litterally a pipe you stick onto the wrench
CooleytheAussie
Ahh we call both a breaker bar. Long ratchet or a pipe over smaller one.
Cheomesh
Fixin' pipe*
fen4
*persuader bar
aPokal
*a strong argument
Treblaine
Thermic Lance: "fuck you, now I'm here to prove a point"
Robvp
Always carry a pipe in the car, makes changing tires so much easier
AMisterShoe
It's when the cheater pipe isn't working that you say fuck it and switch to a 20v drill gun and just rip the top of the bolt off.
S1kmo
And then proceed to the torch. Because that motherfucker cannot win.
parker52
in canada, its called a snipe
Sc00ba5teeve
Cheater pipe? "Class-2 Torque Enhancer"
CumCanon69
tried using a cheater bar on both sides of a tire iron at the same time with a torch on the oil soaked lug nut, my dad standing on one 1/2
CumCanon69
bar and me lifting on the other.... ended up twisting the socket right off the one-piece tire iron
JeremyClarksonDidNothingWrong
The next in the series is the "you motherfucker" 4 foot long section of 2" pipe.
jbcars4life
Then after that, break out the torch and unload the unending stream of f bombs
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
You put a pole over the handle of the biggest one to get more leverage.
StaticXster70
Been there, done that. Many times.
dudeinjapan
The BFP
Althox00
"you wanna play it soft? Let's play it soft. You wanna play it hard? Let's play it hard."
Quesadildos
Then we get out the "You will Submit" 1" drive air impact.
Insomnia297
Is that the metric version? Where I'm from it's the "I'm gonna kill your whole family"
Komer
The moment you reach for the six footer
funkyphil101wastakensoichosethis
Helping my dad change tires on a sprayer. Too accurate with this one
Badsequence
I have a 6' long piece of pipe I use on my pipe wrench when shit gets real and WD-40 just won't cut it.
Cheomesh
A "fixin' pipe"
justacap
I saw it labeled "I will break you".
Axelord
At that point, I've sheared something off, somewhere. It was a muscle, once.
PotooGeatAndWise
1/2 impact- 'Fuck you, I'm tired.'
00ImBatman00
You cheater
Ganonderf
And then if that with a little heat doesn’t work, out comes the angle grinder!
Roland191145
This comment is not only horribly underscored, it is the most accurate.
Pklfkr
God damn bellhousing nut...
Pklfkr
Bolt....
illbeyourfuckleberry
Stud...
TheStateOfDenial
With a mysterious bend at about 18" along it from the last time you had a "you motherfucker" and had to kick the fucking thing loose.
Snooj
I've had to do that a couple times in my life. One for a tire, once for the foot on the bottom of an arcade machine.
PaulSmackageFromGrapevineTexas
Followed by "fuck you, I'm getting the acetylene".
CaldariBob
This is why the good Lord invented assembly grease.
Quackotron
100% accurate. I love you.
Rexsplode
Are you my late father? Although you can't be him, his go to was "come on, you cocksucker!"
CmfMttnPpl
Naw not till u jb weld a socket to it have 2 guys bouncing on the pipe
CurryandRice
I miss top gear..
RPhoenix
On a flex handle instead of a ratchet, right?
ChefJameBalls
If that's not enough you add a long bar inside the other end of the pipe. For old rusty plumbing sometimes you need 10' of leverage.
SkiptheMighty
where is the hammer for shocking the bolt or nut
HelloMyNameIsHuman
After that, drill and tap set "FML"
BoxerRZ
Broke a 1/2" drive breaker bar once while taking an axle nut off. Had a 6' pipe on the end of the breaker bar. Must have been about 250ftlbs
pandorafalters
Were you just kinda poking at the end of the pipe or what? 250 ft-lb divided by 6 ft is only 41 2/3 lb.
BoxerRZ
My bad. Bad math. About 1050 ft-lb.
SocoFox
Aka the "Please don't break/strip moment."
MrBubblehead
My mini sledge is nicknamed hakuna matata, it means no worries, itll come apart.
Craizie
I've used an 8' fence post before on a car where they took it to a diesel mechanic to have their lugs tightened. Broke two ratchets. 1/2
Craizie
3rd one broke them loose.
JeremyClarksonDidNothingWrong
'99 Dodge 2500 4X4 front axle nut, a $26 dealer only part. e46 BMW front ball joint. Both solved with a cutoff wheel.
JeremyClarksonDidNothingWrong
Cut the BMW control arm to get to the ball joint. Cut a flat side to get vice grips on it to stop it from spinning at the top. That was fun.
pandorafalters
Nut splitter.
dav3nasty
And then one of those GIANT impact wrenches that’s broken 4 of your 1in sockets cause you went too cheap on them.
pandorafalters
When things don't move & there's no swing room, I use a 3/4" impact with a 1/2" adapter. Never failed me yet, though it can take a while.
IHuggedaCorgiToday
Then you break your breaker bar and curse some more.
WardSharlow
Or better, you apply herculean force to your breaker bar and then the bolt snaps.
Juicytoast
Happened to me the first time I changed a tire. My dad gave me a precracked pipe for the breaker bar. My dad was a dick.
wakichunu
I've broken a pipe wrench doing the same thing.
SpannerInTheWorx
"FUCK. SHIT. OH YOU, YOOOOOUUUY. YOU GDMF......YOU *WILL* COME OFF, TODAY! NOT TOMORROW, GAWD DAMN IT! TODAY. YOU HEAR ME?!?!" - ME, usually
IHuggedaCorgiToday
When all else fails get the Acetylene torch out
ZebbyIsWitty
Let’s not talk about that one nut way in the back that only 6 uniwiggles and 5 extensions of varying length can get to
SparkyShowers
That's the top two bolts on my transmission because like HELL am I going to yank the engine out when I can drop the transmission instead.
pandorafalters
18" or 24" extension & a ball U-joint is all I've ever needed for upper bellhousing bolts.
SparkyShowers
2002 Ford Ranger 4x4 package, The clutch slave cylinder went out twice in 2 years, I think it was 3 24 inch extensions plus a swivel, Pt. 1
Iouzip
Level 5 is "You will BURN!" When you go get the torch and put the cutting tip on....
Zardif
thats level 6 first is heat it up and try.
ColourBlindMillwright
Make it glow if it doesn't cooperate.
stevetehpirate
If oxy-acetylene doesn't work you're in deep shit.
charles33105
Blue tipped wrench
MrBubblehead
You take the cutting tip off? Lol
Dashin87
Lol our plant has never had anything other than an axe on it
Iouzip
Other techs like to cuz they're pussies
Chrispybobispy
Level 6.... go cry in the corner for awhile then busting the drill out.
Rusticshine
lvl 7 pay someone else to do it after realizing you broke the drill bit 3/4 the way through and don't have a single spare bit the same size
Veffakin
Or snap an easy out in it and can't drill it anymore without heavy duty bits
pobody
Carbide drill then walks off the hole and completely trashes the part.
Robotguy4
lvl 8 is you find out it's a left hand screw thread.
agmlego
Fucking BMW with the left-hand retaining bolt on the rotor. Whaled on it for a day with impacts and torches until we realized...
Tyfu
That was me. Fucking bolt snapped on me for the thermostat housing. I tried myself to sleep for a week
WhyDontYouMakeMe
That happened during my first real repair job. It crushed my spirit....
BLACKHAWK6901
I got pissed and grabbed the saw and took it out in pieces. New bolt and nut are in. Cars back on the road
BLACKHAWK6901
I feel your pain.... Just broke a cradle bolts head off... Other end is a captured nut inside the body
BGonz
burn
MechaGandalf
a captured nut inside the body, eh? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
AMisterShoe
Before the torch I go to the 20v drill gun. I'll fucking rip the head of the bolt off with friction before I waste gas on it.
Iouzip
And then use an extractor bit or what?
MoreCowBellBaby
Then watch the sky fall around you now that you have to drill it iut
AMisterShoe
I guess I'm saying this for using 15/16 bolts like I do on truss at work. It's not threaded in the trust, just clamping it together.
AMisterShoe
So if you break the head off the bolt can be smacked through with a hammer and pin.
CKOD
"Ok so you wanna play games, lets play games"
AirplaneNerd
I need one of these... for reasons.
BigJewishHulk
Put your dick in it!
Capitannut
Skookum as frig.
TheRachettingSpanner
Uncle Bumble Fuck
pluviofile
Is that a fucking double air input impact tool?
CKOD
Nope, hydraulic ratchet. Small hydro cylinder turns the socket, flat part braces on the adjacent bolt. For torquing bolts on pipework, etc.
CKOD
YouTuber AVE has a series of destructively testing ratchets with one. Shearing 1/2" drives like it's nothing.