Not all heroes wear capes

Jun 26, 2017 8:00 PM

corbywhiskey

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180654

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4299

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153

I was working at a local high school and found a plant in the garbage

Long time lurker first post.... hope you like it.

A better love story than Twilight. (not a high bar, admittedly)

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Do you need a friend

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This was too cute for my face.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This Wall-E sequels a bit shit...

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#stanleyandstacy

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Awesome. So cool

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You've done a good and cute thing @OP

8 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Go Stanley !

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 3

Feed me Seymour

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

would that be Splat Stanley?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Looks like they've never heard of recycling either

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

This is my favorite thing of the day.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This is too sweet for the internet's cruelty.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Thanks for saving the planet Keith

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

So we're not going to talk about the horticulture aspect where putting two plants so close together in a small pot = competition? Okay!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Plot twist: Poison ivy + @OP is deathly allergic.

8 years ago | Likes 27 Dislikes 0

"Leaves of three, let it be". Based on the picture, I'm fairly sure OP will be okay.

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Welcome to the dark side. Prepare for downvote hell and upvote euphoria. May you see frontpage.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

I foresee... FRONTPAGE!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

You shouldn't name it. Then you'll feel guilty when you need to kill it for salad!

8 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

Can confirm. I always feel guilty when I break off part of my Aloe Vera (its called Leslie).

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Anyone more concerned that they threw away a whole cardboard box? That shit should be recycled!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Schlitts

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

THEIR*

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

you don't know that, might just be missing a comma

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Keith, you're gonna get a lot of tit pics

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I can only hope!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As someone who did yard work all day, I threw away a lot of plants

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You the man Keith.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I work in a nursery. Looks like beans from the leaves and stems. I'm guessing it was part of a biology lab. Give it sun. Not an indoor plant

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

/2 I'm gonna add to this that I even see a bean pod. Not pothos. This guy looks like he's never been fertilized and had too little sun. Also

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

@OP please give it a bigger pot than what ya did. Needs more room than that.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Alright I'll find a bigger pot. Thanks!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I have no idea and my parents only own a small garden, but to me it also looks like beans. If you're lucky, you can harvest maybe, 8 or ten.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

What kind of plant is it? Are you sure it's not a weed?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Beans.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Pretty certain that's a Pothos. One of the most common houseplants. It's very resilient, so quite easy to take care of.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The only ways to kill pothos in a room kept between 60° and 80° Fahrenheit and at an average illuminance of at least five lux are to →

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

deprive it of water for a month or possibly longer or to physically attack it. It will also thrive at higher temperatures as long as it →

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

isn't subject to direct sunlight, though it will need more frequent watering. Probably. I literally water my plants whenever they start to →

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

droop slightly, a condition which is very easy to see at a passing glance, and then they perk back up to their fullest within an hour. →

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You fool! do you have any idea what you have done?!?

8 years ago | Likes 61 Dislikes 2

I once rescued a fern from a dumpster and put it on a high shelf in my bathroom. Turned out it was full of spiders.

8 years ago | Likes 71 Dislikes 0

That is terrifying!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Spiders are good. They eat the bad bugs.

8 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 2

No offense to spiders but I would rather fight Satan with plastic spoon, while wear thong, than to fuck with a spider.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

They're hard to appreciate when they're jumping into your hair.

8 years ago | Likes 43 Dislikes 1

such friendly spiders!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

They were searching for lice man.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

They just want hug you with all their 8 arms.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Plot twist: Japanese knotweed

8 years ago | Likes 103 Dislikes 1

Knot weed and bamboo are invasive species here, same as hog weed but I've never come accross it.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

What's that? (I'm too lazy/scared to Google)...

8 years ago | Likes 47 Dislikes 0

A very invasive plant that grows/spreads like mad.

8 years ago | Likes 49 Dislikes 1

Japanese knotweed vs American Kudzu... Who would win?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

naw, it's some kind of vine, I've seen plenty of Japanese knot weed

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Neon pothos*

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Potato vine

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That plant is the worst.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Plot twist: kudzu

8 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 0

I find this unlikely, simply because in the course of 2 hours, it hasn't added 14 feet of growth and eaten a car.

8 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

"Fine! Take it!"

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Sick reference, bro.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Nah Adobe kid found a rad way to kill the fucker off been testing it out in south texas seems to be working I can kinda see my fence again

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

TELL ME OF THIS SORCERY. I MUST KNOW.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Its like a drill that settles into the ground and pumps helium into the root system kills them dead

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Some*

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Was it, "There; new home." or "Their new home."?

8 years ago | Likes 1016 Dislikes 12

That semi colon; now I'm semi.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

My britches are tightening.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There (a) new home!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Holly crap, yore rite! ;)

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

'They're my home now'

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

There wolf, there castle...

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

There, new home.**** check username

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Their our know rules

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

MY EYES! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!? WHAT FRESH HELL HAVE YOU WROUGHT UPON MY RETINAS?! YOU MONSTER!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There! New home.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Now we're asking the real questions

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

And you work on a school? I hope not as a teacher then...

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 10

On a school?

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

No

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yes

8 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

Theiy're,, knew home

8 years ago | Likes 85 Dislikes 2

thair* wur* wair* yer* yer* yer* thair* 2* 2*

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I think I hate you more than anyone

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

More then anyone.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I think aye hete yew moar then eny1

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

hoam*

8 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 1

Holme*

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Hoalme*

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

..... their.... My bad

8 years ago | Likes 375 Dislikes 8

Their; new home.

8 years ago | Likes 35 Dislikes 3

You monster.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hey! You got "you're" right, so they cancel each other out!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

They're*

8 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 26

Theiyre're

8 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 1

They've'n't'd

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

????

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

You're a teacher????? Jk happens to everyone lol

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

No, I'm a hvac contractor. I was working on the building.

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 1

I'm HVAC too! HAHAHA!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

lol I should've known by the shoes! You are much appreciated during the hot days!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Your bad? Or you're bad?

8 years ago | Likes 79 Dislikes 0

Your bad

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Why not both?

8 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Until you learn it Audrey II or Audrey III

8 years ago | Likes 298 Dislikes 4

Little shop, little shop o' horrors!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

FEED ME SEYMOUR

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

When I was in HS, I was Mr. Mushnick in LSoH. Audrey II's mouth was operated by a puppeteer twerking. I had to lie under my friend twerking.

8 years ago | Likes 31 Dislikes 0

RHS?

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

really? i have a hard time believing you

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 3

The upper body was in the top half of the mouth and the legs supported it. To give the illusion of chewing, the puppeteer had to twerk.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Having been in High School drama, I totally would not put it past the tech crew to get/build a Twerk-operated puppet

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Why does that seems so unfathomable to you? Doesn't sound unlikely to me, and seems like a weird thing to lie about

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

thats the thing, its one of those kind of paradoxes, its hard to believe but its so outlandish you have to believe it.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

It's outlandish that, while performing in a 2 person costume, the person above would move their ass as though they were twerking? But...why?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0