CarLeg
267804
7418
203
Jan 18, 2014 4:30 PM
CarLeg
267804
7418
203
FacelessGod
I am always nervous yet aroused around attractive women.
loseyajzn
a sufferer of bitchy resting face
nevek
tip 1 could get dangerous when you get down to splitting the last atom...
ngthagg
Re #4: This is bad advice. Wear clothing that is flattering for your body. Why wear clothes that don't look good on you?
DangerCrab
I liked these, gj artist.
danzafan37
#5 is so true. I had a GF that refused to fart in front of me or poop at all when she was around me...
anSSLerrorhasoccuredandasecureconnectiontotheservercannotbemade
I. Love. This.
emergemz24
As a girl, all I took away from this is that the URL kinda says "Bilbo."
CarLeg
Me too!!!
Vogerl
Source direly needed! GIMME!
ruinah
If you hadn't seen it yet - http://the-toast.net/author/kendra-wells/
ReYo
As a man, I shall now start shopping for my bikini.
RangerSloth
Carleigh! LOOK AT YOU! You shot up here! great job with your first front pager! @xtabi99
CarLeg
Aww :3 Thanks Granty
Mogmai
FUCK WOMAN ETIQUETTE, I EAT ALL THE CAKE. IT'S MINE. ALL MINE.
graythirteen
I hate it when people don't finish food. So wasteful.
JustAHumanist
Female Mantis is *always* in season
Zerogun
Isn't the ladywoman who embraces number 8 the kind you want to high five then awkwardly try to ask out? My kind of ladywoman
diabolicalpenguinarmyoverulesallupvotes
+1 for number 4. Strut your stuff!
DittoAidsCircus
I remember standing in a line then someone apparently brushed my arm. She thought I was "feeling her up" and tried to push me.
sembor
#4, bikini body. No, you don't look fine. If you're a whale, 80% of people won't be pleased by your looks. but you shouldn't fucking care.
DeadGodJess
As a queen sized lady, yes, thank you.
phdinhorribleness
The correct term is "scaroused"
Moocat
I loved all of these. "Why do you think I bought all that Jamie Lee Curtis yogurt!?"
solaslunas
Added note to the bikini tip: Make sure you get a bikini that is made for your size. Too big or small looks odd. (applies to all clothes)
SonOfTheShire
I like three and six.
bennabo
As a guy being generally curious, how often do those two actually happen? I don't think I've ever done them, outside of accidents or photos.
backet
I like five and seven.
hellchi
Who the fuck told you ladies that we are in denial about your bodily functions? We might be confused by your PMS but shitting... c'mon?
DeadGodJess
Guys.
Trickscore
LALALALALA GIRLS DON'T POOP LALALA
Berethian
Yeah, number four isn't true. Dress appropriately for your body type - no matter WHAT shape you are.
RubiksKlube
Imgur-Where we'll normalize everything to hell. EVERYTHING.
CrabWallet
That's not what "normalize" means.
NoDirectionHome
SRSLY
VegasBorn
Anyone, Any size or shape can wear anything. If you don't like what someone wears, or how they look in it. DON'T LOOK
CrabWallet
I know, right? The kids be like, "I don't wanna see your erect cock," and I be like, "If you don't wanna see my cock on this playground, go"
22Below
Surely "appropriate" is subjective? I'm not tailoring my wardrobe to please every damn person who sees me, I'd rather be comfortable
Berethian
There is a degree of subjective, yes, but the collective subjective is called 'appropriate', and surely you know what that is?
deniseFTW
I can relate to Girl Tip #3. I can't help my natural bitch face.
retgarr
Great part about being a guy. I get the comments, but it's never condescending.
earthvexingovaries
I call mine Chronic Bitchface.
sillypinkpanda
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v98CPXNiSk
babytrista
I was once told my natural resting face looked like "the grumpy internet cat."
SailorVSays
Ugh. I've been dealing with that since middle school. "Why don't you smile?" or "Smile, you look better that way" -_-
MamaMiaMermaid
seriously. everyone at my new gig thinks i'm a huge bitch. I just look like this =(
NoDirectionHome
when people tell me to smile, i tell them to fuck off.
itwasadarkandstormynight
No one tells you to otherwise manipulate your face to suit them. But, Smile! is acceptable while being passive aggressively intrusive.
itwasadarkandstormynight
Next time I'm minding my beeswax and someone says, Smile!, I'm gonna derp.
AngryCabbage
Damn I hate the onslaught of "you look pissed off!" whenever I'm in neutral. :| Well, after the 5th comment, yes now I am pissed. Agh.
Atharaenea
They tell you to smile because they believe women exist to be pretty for them. Not because you look bitchy.
Supernaut007
I think I found the feminist
NoDirectionHome
that's also why i don't wear makeup
TheStigsDisownedCousinWhoCantDriveForShit
A friend came up with a nickname for mine: "Stop making your fishface!"
thelittlestbear
a sufferer of bitchy resting face
CarLeg
My brf is hardcore..
IcedVenom
I don't get why it is acceptable for people to tell a stranger to smile. Why the EFF?!?! Being told to smile NEVER makes me want to smile.
DaniTatro
oh I know, this one customer at my work is always really horrible, and rude and eveyrhting. At the end she always says "how come ur not smi
DaniTatro
iling??" stuipid bitch
DaniTatro
so.. are you actually a bitch? I am a woman, and I do think "natural bitch face" women are actual bitches deep down. true??
deniseFTW
Nah. I'm really shy but once I open up I'm pretty nice.
DaniTatro
interesting!
GingerTheBeard
i like how the bikini one had a guy in it. :3 that made me happy.
Fire1Earth2Air4Water1
no no it's girl tips so I thought at least it was depicting an example of a lady with a 3rd body type all the body types are allowed
DeadGodJess
Or, transwoman.
silentninjadesu
A transwomen's body is still an example of a 3rd body type.
DeadGodJess
True.
ADrinkGiver
honey why :-(
relevenceisinthemindofthebeholder
because she bought jamie lee curtis yogurt
sandibebop
^ My mother's comment on every single picture of me on facebook.
CakEttE
My mother's response to me on most of my photos: "You're fucked up, kid.. just like your momma"
habslove
lol same here
Ninjinister
I read that as "homey why"
psnivy
totally didn't realize that it WASN'T "homey" until I got to the comments! xD
toastshrine
Yeah, this was the one that had my upvote.
MissBunnyCake
This made me burst out laughing
RavenDay
All of them had me laughing. My fiancé is looking at me strangely now.
GigaHobo
Source is http://the-toast.net/author/kendra-wells/
IndustrialBunny
http://kendrawcandraw.com
FlightoftheBumbleBear
would there happen to be tumblr? Cause I'm having trouble find the real one.
IndustrialBunny
http://kendrawcandraw.com
FlightoftheBumbleBear
You guys are awesome! thanks!
IndustrialBunny
np :3
shadowex3
The first girl in #4 is BEYOND obese, we need to stop normalizing that with this "you're beautiful anyway" bullshit. She's DYING people.
pappycat
I'm gonna guess she (THE FUCKING CARTOON) knows she is overweight. That doesn't mean she should feel like shit all the time.
ArmageddonOctopus
She's a drawing..
SalsaOreos
And Barbie is just a doll, but she gets blamed for enforcing negative body images all the time...
demut
Nice comeback.
spookymelissa
I'm fat as fuck and I don't have any "fat side effects" just because someone is large doesn't mean it affects their health.
BrassKicker
That or maybe just possibly there's a chance that the side effects aren't immediately apparent.
SavageHonesty
Give it time.
LofferLogge
You are an exception then, or you are just unaware of adverse effects you have. Almost all obese people have health problems.
spookymelissa
I'm tested frequently for "fat" health problems and it's usually lower than normal
demut
Usually, huh? Lower than normal, huh?
spookymelissa
Well there was once or twice where my blood pressure was higher than normal because of being mad at having to wait
lainie
You should stop believing what the media feeds you.
swedishsquish
Let's talk in a couple of years when you need triple bypass, kiddo.
lainie
I'll stop believing that "all fat people are beautiful" when you stop believing that all fat people will die of heart attacks.
swedishsquish
Thinking that being overweight does not have adverse effects on every fat person's health is naive.
lainie
Thinking that being overweight has adverse effects on every fat person's health is naive.
NoDirectionHome
neither do smokers. at first.
neverendingstaircase
Really? let's talk again in a few years!
lainie
Lets talk again, and you'll learn that I'm still fine :) Just looking obese does not 100% mean you have a bad heart.
neverendingstaircase
And I say this as someone who has to lose "just 15" kg, because I got high cholesterol and I am not fit and don't feel healthy!
neverendingstaircase
It's not just the heart, it is diabetes, stroke, high blood pressure, sleep apnea,lack of fitness,high cholesterol and blood lipid values!
demut
Don’t forget about increased risks for certain cancer types.
spookymelissa
so what you meant to say was..." I find fat people to be gross" and your opinion is fine but don't be spouting bullshit like it's fact
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
His comment made me angry too. No one tells the malnutritioned, eating-disordered supermodels to put clothes on and stop "normalizing (1/2)
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
them" because we as a society ARE doing that. No one ever talks about what those girls have to go through because they don't care (2/3..)
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
they just look good and that's all that matters. When did being able to wear a bikini have anything to do with how healthy you are? (3/3)
spookymelissa
I wonder if the person who said people who look like they are dying are unattractive says the super skinny models are ugly as well
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
That was my initial thought. I can't take reddit/imgur for this very reason. I am not even fat, but I feel shame in reading some of these
iliketokeepitsimplestupid
Think that the unhealthy larger people are not good.Such as people who are at an extremely high risk of heart disease or wheeze just walking
spookymelissa
You are entitled to your opinion but what does someone else's fatness have to do with you...at all?
TF2215
Well if taxes are going into healthcare it kind of does.
iliketokeepitsimplestupid
It doesn't... I'm overweight myself. I'm just saying if someone looks like they're dying it shouldn't be called beautiful...
deviantchee
We're all dying...
demut
Not all of us cost the health care system billions because of our shitty food habits though ...
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
We cause the health care system billions because smoking, alcohol abuse, mental problems, etc. Everyone has a vice. You are no better than
demut
Yeah, everyone probably has a vice (or several) but not every vice affects our societies equally.
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
As an individual, your vice probably will affect healthcare costs more than a fat person's will. There are a lot more expensive treatments
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
a fat person. Get over yourself.
demut
Make no mistake, I hassle smokers and alcoholics all the same. Mental probs are often not the person’s fault, not sure why you included ’em.
deviantchee
Ok. *shrug*
demut
Yeah, right, shrug it off like that isn’t a big deal :|
deviantchee
You want to argue. I don't.
elerico
See, you say that like you're concerned for her health, but with all the fat shaming it just comes off as patronizing and insulting.
shadowex3
See, you say "fat shaming" but really you've been SO INDOCTRINATED by the normalization of obesity your perspective has been skewed.
elerico
Obesity is probably the biggest health problem in the US, period. It's a very personal topic for a lot of people, so we have to be (1)
elerico
extremely cautious so we address this issue without antagonizing those who are suffering. It's not what you said, it's your delivery. (2)
[deleted]
[deleted]
elerico
Uh, not helping. Like, at all.
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
Why isn't he concerned about the health of the pale girl w/ the ribs showing? She could be underweight and in dire need of attention too!
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
wait this is just blatant fat shaming nvm
CrabWallet
Talk to a doctor. Seeing ribs isn't unhealthy. You have a skewed understanding of healthy body composition.
demut
She still has tits tho’ so I doubt that her body fat ratio is on the unhealthy side. But who knows, you might be right after all. Let’s ask.
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
1. She doesn't have tits, that's just a bikini bra. That's what they look like. 2. Boob jobs are a thing amongst waifs in Hollywood (1/2)
whatthefuckbuzzfeed
3. Why people can't just admit that this is less to do with health and more to do with attractiveness. Which is what the tip was addressing
ScruffnShine
Not gonna lie, the Female Mantis would work on me.
Reg06
Yeeeeeeeeeah
NikolaTeslaWasCool
I've never had a time where I wasn't happy to be scaroused.
ICantBelieveThisNameWasFree
Hello.....
ivegotsoulbutimnotasoldier
MM YOU LOOK DELICIOUS
Monarchist
*scared boner intensifies*
ScruffnShine
be gentle
DMGuy
Or don't.
GodkillerJack
reminds me of the Futurama episode on Amazon Planet
dathomiripunk
We take her to femputer. SHE KNOW WHAT DO
ScruffnShine
ME WANT SNU-SNU!!!!
Pekwachnamaykoskwaskwaypinwanik
The scared/aroused thing always works for me.
Mikozu
Usually stuff with aroused works for me. Tough there are situations where it's very inconvenient .
tentsie
Then you'd love my best friend :D
ScruffnShine
how quickly would I get scaroused?
Seba2298
Scared yet aroused is the best form of arousement.
GerryBerries
Maybe if she was Black Widow.
AcronymChallenged
"I'm nervous yet aroused." I have this reaction so often.
Autodidact86
I'm Scareroused.
Reg06
Yeeeeeeeeeah
LadyDisdain
I AM the Female Mantis.
DukePaulAtreides
I've had it used on me. Horrifying, yet effective.
IRejectYourRealityAndSubstituteMyOwn
Reminds me of that one episode of Buffy though...
Daffodildoe
i was just watching buffy... i am way past that episode but i was just watching buffy
MiltonTheBetta
Poor Xander...
KFizzle
This statement applies throughout most of the Series, especially Anya's death, seriously WTF man, she got halved & no-one else blinked much.
MiltonTheBetta
I know! None of the girls even said anything, it was Andrew who went to him. Plus, that whole Darth Willow earlier really sucked for him.
KFizzle
Damn that brought it all back, Andrew's only one saw her fall, Buffy etc were like meh fuck Anya. Losing eye, torture, broke, Xander :'(