SodaKid7
154360
4630
76
Aug 19, 2019 5:09 PM
SodaKid7
154360
4630
76
Noodlespanker
I can't tell for sure but I think Becky is screaming and crying at the same time in her profile picture.
grimgrinner
Came here to invite Amazon employees to Lake Lao Gai. You amazing people did not disappoint me. The Dai Li thanks you.
NotTheDevilYouKnow
There is no war in Hong Kong.
ikindacarebutimostlydont
People joke because they realize Amazon treats their employees like shit...and then they still buy from Amazon anyway and support that.
detour512
My boss gives us free cereal!!! /a/h6JcHeU
evilspyre
My capto.. oops my bosses treat me very well, I am fed and happy and love working for [company name to be inserted later] I love our brand
Zreen
There is no war in Ba Sing Se
oTenshi
https://imgur.com/wXovqL4
AhhhhComeOn
My friend Jet went to work there. Said he gets to work by a beautiful lake.
GlobalStrike
I heard he was invited to the lake by the earth king himself! What luck!
secretoaster
Besides the sarcasm, Amazon is seriously wrecking where I live. It's contruction everywhere. I hate them so much but I still love Amazon for
secretoaster
Shopping because I love online shopping because it helps me to stay inside my cocoon.
phunkiejunkie
We've always been at war with Eastasia.
VicinoOrsini
Freedom is the liberty to state that 2+2=4
pres2pond
But consider: The tweets are so intentionally obviously bad because the people making them are rebeling against the machine.
pres2pond
Like, imagine you had to tell the world your job sucks but you can only post uplifting tweets from a list of approved phrases.
roguerpi
Skumbo
I wish MY boss gave me Red Bulls, or atleast amphetamines.
landofbob
I work at Amazon and my boss cares about me. He taught me how to take meth rectally. It is a real time saver and give me the energy to go!
skincancerisfun
How much teaching is really involved in shoving crystals into your anus?
Doshegotabooty
I am definitely not being held as prisoner at Amazon. SO not. I repeat, SOS not.
Picard2024
ItsActuallyDavidNow
Amazon cares for me. My management listens to my problems and the food is good. We are treated well and have a clean means of career growth.
NotSoBizarre
One time at work we were having a BBQ and my boss beat me with jumper cables for performing better than yesterday, it was best day ever
CrazyEarl
because when I got home my dad saw thatbI had been beaten with jumper so he got to relax instead of beating me with jumper cables.
SemperFiZero
That's creepy and scary af.
fedeColorTerror
I guess it's all a prank. Someone of 4Chan probably organized it
mialynneb
The entire thread was creepy af. Very SkyNet.
JustASlightJingleOfPocketChangePulsing
So what am I missing, because I don't get any of this or why it is funny...
CrazyEarl
Also Avatar the Last Air Bender reference. Joo Dee was brainwashed.
Armored0Titan0
Amazon paid a bunch of people to write tweets that read like the writer had a gun to their head.
apfelstrudelmakesmehappy
Reminds me of The Circle.
dreamweaver35
I start a new job working for amazon in a week. These kind of posts scare me, but the offer is the best I've ever had. It's in a data center
click4567
As long as you avoid working in the warehouses, you're fine. They know better than to treat techs like that. Good techs are harder to find.
click4567
That being said, if you work in the warehouse expect 10 hour shifts and 5 minute breaks with min wage. Worst year of my life.
letsnotgetcereal
About 7mos late replying, but should you have any questions, reach out. I used to work in their DC space for 5yrs.
dreamweaver35
Yes please! Got the job, and got flipped in all this time. But I always need assistance
Maultasche
whitefoxkei
Needed more Verrik.
Maultasche
LonelyHumanBoy
It should say: [The Thing Intensifies]
Maultasche
ScarletSnatch
I work for Amazon too. Managers dont care, HR doesnt care. People are rude, selfish morons because there are no hiring standards
iwishjtmoneywasstillavailableitsmyoldvideogamemoniker
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
ruint
delete this, or bezos will strap you to a rocket booster for a ground firing test
kalabash
“incident report”
CabLady
HR in any company is to cover the butt of the company, they are not your friend.
Noodlespanker
You're not happy enough. I'll teach you to be happy!
kingbudo101
bright side is automation is gonna replace majority of warehouse workers within 10 years
Nuttsy
I thought that too, but developments have me thinking that the only thing dumber than a biorobot on a production line, is an actual robot.
tub8tor
Unless they change how they deliver (vans and cars) then itll still be a lot of human work
TMP5
drones.
DukeDarkwood
Someone's going to bring up self-driving cars, I just know it. It won't be immediately viable; I figure they'll need to be supervised, plus
DukeDarkwood
someone has to get the package from vehicle to door. But, given more time, they'll probably be able to address both those issues. Of course,
DukeDarkwood
there's also the whole delivery-by-drone route, which cuts out vehicles AND delivery personnel.
astonishingstupidthoughts
My boss feeds us meth to keep working
LadiesInboxMeYourInsecurities
I've seen that episode of NCIS
PicassoCT
We used to get Benzodiazepine but now we have a better one. Bezosdiazepine
TheVampireDante
So you work for Apple.
Goldenteckel
... and also Soylent Green.
ChristianSalge
wait you can eat meth?
darksniperknight
My workplace is too cheap to provide meth or crack.
sparrowfx
How do I apply?
Imademyselfsquirtle
Hitler?
NightingalePledge
Ride the crystal pony...
TheHazeStriker
Damn where do you work?
keyserv
Free meth? Holy shit, what a perk!
imgurdotcommie
Had a friend work a restaurant gig where the owner would give em blow. Needless to say checks started bouncing and shit got bad fast.
TwoToneeRebel
line cook?
LurkerOfDarkness
*line of coke
Blze001
Jeez, your compensation package is way better than mine.
chazthapaladin
Yeah, but they also don't give dental insurance.
Isthe4thtimethecharm
Seriously I just get told get to work or go home.
FrenziiTheSuccubus
I could use some meth at work right now.
DUCKFORABUCK
Me too
IUpvoteForFood
God damn it's horrible for your body but god DAMN is it effective
ishavemyareolas
onewallpaperaweek
pewasaurusrex
I mean...they're right there...who's to say they don't have their own Twitter accounts? Lazy damn bots on social media during work hours...
JangJangles
And here we see Joo Dee and Becky working happily with their friends, Joo Dee v.2, Becky beta .98 and BeepBoop
bobstallone
Like Cowboy BeepBoop from the cartoon?
tub8tor
Until they got proper robots to either package boxes into a van or straight up drone deliver them from the first warehouse there is still1/2
tub8tor
A lot of human work for getting those packages to you 2/2
TheFastpaws
Amazon literally lacks a soul but nobody cares! Cheap shit trumps human rights!
HenryLongfellowIII
They bought the company that designs those things to keep competitors from getting them.
macmaster2000
Yeah but AGV's aren't uncommon in the slightest, from several manufacturers, so there are tons of options
zimirken
...that's total bs. I've literally talked with people who work at one of the companies that does this that amazon contracted recently
Counterfit
So basically what Starbucks did with Clover (the coffee brewer machine, not the point of sale system)
ElbowDeepInAPoliceState
And yet their coffee still tastes like burnt shit
HenryLongfellowIII
The Clover stuff is the most drinkable Starbucks has. Not all the stores have one. It's a good example.
ElbowDeepInAPoliceState
Still tastes like burnt shit
HenryLongfellowIII
Precisely.
OliverClothesoff70
Do you do that a lot? Just make shit up and state it like it's a fact? You're completely wrong on the "why" of this.
HenryLongfellowIII
Kiva had promised to keep shipping its tech to other vendors. But it didn't work out that way:
HenryLongfellowIII
In the spring of 2015, Amazon changed Kiva's name to Amazon Robotics.
HenryLongfellowIII
It then suggested that other retailers keen to use its robotic army let Amazon Robotics
MightestGlowCloud
Isn't another company just going to design something very similar but legally different shortly?
EricFromAccounts
There are already dozens of very similar robots in development, with a fair few already in service in factories around the world.
ElbowDeepInAPoliceState
Alibaba has a couple mega warehouses that use bots for sorting small packages
Trislar
Still delays the competition.
DropsWittyComments
Correct. Time is money. They can build a model to justify the acquisition cost and entry delay reward in yrs. standard in the big league
DerRattenfngerVonHameln
Yes. And the cost/time/quality of such unnecessary R&D will *forever* put them few tiny steps behind. Few, but forever.
ElbowDeepInAPoliceState
By that logic Ford ought to be the best automakers in the world, which clearly isn't the case.
DerRattenfngerVonHameln
Because it is not a game you can win Х times out of Х plays. And with every new competitor a complication of a lag image is unceasing.
HenryLongfellowIII
Kiva had better technology than the others.
ElbowDeepInAPoliceState
If they're manufactured in china the clones will be the same down to the branding
mrwhippysdietcolashake
I CAME HERE TO YELL STUFF AT THIS COMMENT BECAUSE IM AN ANGRY PERSON
HenryLongfellowIII
YOU CAN'T FIGHT HERE, THIS IS THE WAR ROOM!
mrwhippysdietcolashake
OKAY
HenryLongfellowIII
HAVE A NICE DAY THEN!
LadyYmir
I work for Amazon as well. If we get too exhausted, Mr. Bezos sends us to this beautiful lake for a paid vacation. Amazon is great.
pewterpenguin
How much does he makes you pay for the vacation?
dreamweaver35
I start my new job with amazon in a week. These posts scare me. But I've been assure the koolaid at the lake is fabulous
Dickslover
I work part time as an Amazon shopper. It's pretty lax on the clock, but they're very strict on attendance.
Dickslover
I have heard working conditions in some of the fulfillment centers are hell though.
attofreak
When we get tired, we are put in a special, empty room, where we think about how lucky we are to push boxes for Amazon.
Ialmostgotthis
Darn at my job if we get tired and our production drops, they send us to a farm upstate to play with people's childhood pets.
healover
smashmore
A lake of lava is still a lake.
TechnicallyRight
I won the lottery for a trip to the island!
foltjman42
I work for Amazon, and when I absolutely love my job, I have never seen this lake get away. What level do you have to be?
loctrizzle
42
Ceracuse
Are these all inside jokes? I'm not getting the references
Sunmonster
GoldblumNoises
Tahiti is a magical place
NotNotDeadpool
Loved when that came full circle.
Rifneno
GoldblumNoises
FrankTheThunderbird
It took me about a full minute to get that.
Jolars
Last names are almost never used for a person in Amazon, Mr bezos would actually be 'Jeff'
MermaidBiologist
The Jeff King has invited you to Lake Laogai
LadyYmir
Mess with Jeff, prepare for death.
Player3hasArrived
What's the lake called?
BunterTheMage
Lake Lao Gai
h2094
Gitche Gumee
wilsonflanges
Where stood the wigwam of Nokomis.
FloodingWaters
Does she give up her dead?
thisusernamehasbeenpasseddownthearmstrongfamilyforgenerations
Mr. Bezos would like to invite you to Lake Laogai
EccentriCanadian
Do you mean The Island?
Okebel
Tahiti is a magical place.
lolwutface
I am honored to accept his invitation.
Nurich
O.O I'm honored to exept his invitation
whimsicalsamurai
RUN, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY RUN!
SkinIsStrongFleshIsWeak
Rifneno
Everybody's making lake comments. What did I miss here?
caedescorvidus
Avatar the last Airbender like the character in the image. Lake laogai is an element in the story
MermaidBiologist
Watch "Avatar: The Last Airbender". The character in the above image has been (SPOILER) brainwashed at a place called Lake Laogai.
schnager
Well I WAS waiting on that episode to air this friday on nickolodeon, but no point now I guess!!
LadyYmir
15 years and we're still assholes for spoiling you somehow, after you already saw a ton of references here, knowing there'd be spoilers.
schnager
5 people, including @LadyYmir, have no idea what sarcasm is unless the /s is tacked onto the end of a comment. . .
LadyYmir
Oh fuck off, you know damn well you cannot discern sarcasm from seriousness on the internet.