Lassannn
168419
6360
157
Aug 12, 2016 3:33 AM
Lassannn
168419
6360
157
SilasKnight01
Best parenting advice I've ever seen.
vkvs
that is an excellent sweater
acuteavocado7
i would definitely wear that sweater
HappiestBear
for the first one I was like "wow your mom is really young" then I realize i'm an idiot.
samthepea
Sing to the not well cats.
amahler
the last one is adorable. the overly sexual/aggressive dad is cringe-worthy. all others are dads just being dads.
fraktur
Where can I get a headlamp like that? Asking for a friend.
exponentiallymusical
That is the coolest fucking Christmas sweater are you kidding me?
skydivingbigfoot
You know what gives me hope? A girl that looks like that has a crush on a guy that looks vaguely like me in #1
superpatito
Fuck off Lassannn!
SuperTacticalSandwich
My daughter is 7 and isn't quite ready to be embarrassed of me, but I'm ready.
HyperCreations
I embarrassed my daughter so often that I ended up raising a daughter who can no longer be embarrassed.
DickAilshart
#14 toddler shaming? And people say I am an asshole
Vydrach
The Tahra Dactyl one, #7, reminded me of this:
wappit
True story, thats my ex girlfriend. Sorry to say its a pseudonym, not her real name.
yourusernamesucksballs
I would love to have anyone of those dad's. My bio dad is currently serving 10 years in a feudal prison for drugs and my step dad just got
yourusernamesucksballs
Sentenced to 50 years for manslaughter. Really awesome in the dad department
BangBangLuckyLuke
I have few life goals other than being an embarrassing Father. I feel it is one of the only jobs I might actually be good at.
biloo83
1. Goddamnit, Cindy, 2. Your dad IS an internet sensation 3. I like the rule of three.
AndersV
"Chafe your thighs" .. classy dad!
SwiggityDiggitySwoo
this was creepy af
chocolateraptor
well, by their grammar I could tell that they probably weren't exactly high school graduates either....
10ring
Really? Hating on a dad using humor to remind suitors if you violate HER consent, you'll have to deal with her AND her support system?
r0b0tc0rpse
That guy waiting with that shotgun? Yeah, he put a tactical stock on a 28'' vent rib pump action, he must be a giant douche bag. 28'' 1/2
r0b0tc0rpse
barrels are more for sporting purposes like sporting clays, trap, and skeet. For a home defense gun you want 18.5-20'' so you can 2/3
r0b0tc0rpse
maneuver it in the tight confines of a home. You don't want your assailant to be able to grab the barrel and render it useless. 3/3
Hawkmoth
Randy is an embarrassing human. That is not how you Dad.
AwesomeName
#5 is a very ungrateful son, IMHO
mormacil
Yeah who doesn't like reindeer threesomes on his shirt.
ICanChangeMyNameLater
At least he put it on. I'd wear it.
chocolateraptor
I'd wear the shit outta that sweater!!!
BurgundyBurrito
Yeah I'd wear it
RyuKensatsu
Ah yes, parents. I have those as well.
vauhtihirmu
SwiggityDiggitySwoo
It really is sick ... like a weird sort of bullying ...
UptownFunkgotmeLockedOutOfHeavenwitha24kMagicGrenade
No matter what he does people are gonna complain about it.
flover
I'd want to know what he tried before this and what it took to get to this point.
spartatia
How to make sure she'll never trust him again
WalkingMurphysLaw
I feel like I'm not going to be the shotgun type father, but more of the "I farted but blame it on my daughter/wife" father.
snott
This is me.
carolinaguuurl
When my kids hey were toddlers, they farted a lot, and loudly. I taught them to always follow up with "DADDY FARTED AGAIN".
SamuelArk
There's a weird overt sexual frustration dad's sometimes project onto their daughters and transfer the guilt via hostility onto boyfriends.
22ndCenturyTransient
I was always under the impression it was because the dads like that were the kind of guys they wouldn't trust dating their dating in school.
sjukfan
I wonder if dads do stuff like this to keep sane? Like how teachers have chair races after the students have left.
flover
You mean teachers have Mai Tai races. Forget that chair shit, drink away the pain!
ThisAccountIsMainlyForUpvoting
Yeah, we usually just drink a lot.
UpvotingCats
WHATS A CHAIR RACE OMG
The2
Two (or more) chairs with wheels on. Race down the corridors by pushing off the floor backwards.
simplySpike
yes. it's the only thing we have that won't cause real permanent damage to the children, or get us thrown in jail.
Cspott
Nah, teachers just drink. Like a ton.
brownidgurl
Can confirm, cheers!
Skawomplious
This is exactly right. I'm not allowed to have a social life anymore, so it's my duty to ruin my kid's social lives. It's in the contract.
WriteStuff
Exactly
snott
Pretty much. We used to be cool once, but don't have time anymore since kids came along.
SatansFurryJamHats
I was never cool...
CutOffAllTies
You're cool in my eyes
ItsRealTalk
Teachers at my High School used to compete to see who could throw their keys furthest down the halls. They'd invite students some times.
tomatoboy
I had a teacher who used to throw chalkboard erasers into ceiling fans and base decisions on where they landed.
jsavidge
How often did they land on, or hit someone, and was that considered a modifier on the final decision?
tomatoboy
He usually did it in homeroom so rarely, but when they did it distracted him from the original issue and led to 20 minutes of laughter.
Simplyfun
Solidarity among us Dads . Embarrassing our children since the dawn of human awareness.
ThisIsMyNameNowShhhh
Gonna be a new dad. Really looking into these Dad things and Dad Jokes. Ha.
adeptblack
Hear hear
TheRiattAct
I can't wait till I have kids and they are old enough to embarrass the hell out of....i already love making really terrible puns...
Totallynotathrowawayaccountorafirstaccount
I am ready as dicks for when I will be embarrassing my kids. Hell, I already love embarrassing my friends!
AliElkie
When I was a child, even though we were close, I found my dad pretty embarrassing. As an adult I have come to appreciate his comedic genius
Pusujof
Our kids are so small that it is difficult to embarass them, but in ten years things will bw differend... Then the fun begins!
lulurafa
My dad said the best part of being a dad was embarrassing his children.
Simplyfun
you always say that to your kids, the wife gets a different answer.
umbreon089
I wish my dad, my brother's dad, and my other brother's dad didn't leave my mom. Mine pays no child support, my brother's dad (1/2)
umbreon089
is a welder and pays minimum child support, and my other brother's dad is a teacher, so he doesn't get much anyway. (2/2)
CanadaDave
Embarrassing them is the only reason I had children. Well that and free, sporadic & patchy lawn care
Simplyfun
Amen! I tied the quality of maintenance of the lawn to the quality of maintenance I was giving for his dirt bike.
Bwentos
I'm so excited to be a father some day.
Snarkoleptic
Get a pet, it's better.
Highlander8795
I feel I'd be great at this kind of stuff, but really bad at the whole responsibility part. I'll stick to entertaining my neices right now.
ElectricMarley
ITS AWESOME.
ghoulsen
Father since 3 weeks now. I am damn tired ......... But it is awesome
JobbyJabber
Me too bro. I've been preparing for this shit all my life.
PumpkinKing708
The more I'm around my niece and little cousin, the more I actually want to be a dad. But still not too sure.
Kiore
I have no interest in kids of my own but posts like this make me want to like.. pseudo-dad someone else's kids on a part-time basis.
polskazaba
So an uncle?
Kiore
No way, I want to be the 'fun uncle'. ;)
Bombastik
Come here and i Will make your excitement comes true, sweety
BigDeliciousLandMammal
Annie's pretty young, we try not to sexualize her
shouldusemyfacebookaccpunt
I'll just casually fall in line here.
Mimsey
Is there a queue I can join?
Bombastik
JobbyJabber
Clearly you have room for two....
Bombastik
4MR4S
Bombastik
JobbyJabber
/a/lif1t
Lokisenna
Overprotective dads creep me out.
Paxlie
Bad Boys will do that to dads
SingleNiceFedoraWearingClassyGuycautiondonotfriendzone
Same. Guys like shotgun dad are literally just middle-aged bullies who are too afraid to pick on anyone their own size.
flover
Better than dads that don't care at all or aren't there. At least there's a sense of humor about their kid.
imjared19
Yeah if I was a dude and went to pick up my prom date and her dad had a gun, back in the car I go, i'ma fly solo.
ionlymakethisstufftoimpressyourmum
Yeah, bizarre fascination with their daughters vagina. Pretty odd
DickDastardly404
Yeah waiting with a gun just makes you a massive cunt. If you turn up at a girls house and her dad is stood there with a shotty, turn 1/2
DickDastardly404
The fuck around and bounce out. That shit ain't worth prom, kiddo. 2/2
Shrekscoped420
Of course, because you want to bone their daughters.
iwearlittlesocks
Someone has to
kittycatsarefreakingCUTE
Last time I pointed this out on here I said that my dad was overprotective and I lost my virginity and 15 anyway. I got called a whore.
kittycatsarefreakingCUTE
All I'm saying is I was going to do it regardless and I wish I would have had parents that I could tell in order to get proper protection.
ToasterHawk
Dude same. Also lost my virginity at 15. I'm almost 20 and my dad still can't seem to come to terms with the fact that it's my decision.
ultrararepepe
Same, but I feel like that picture is satire, look at the poses and faces, the girl is barely holding back a smile and dad looks cheesy
ruthbaderginsburg
The dad with the gun, nope, wouldn't deal with that nutcase
ItsMorphinTimeIdiot
Yeah, the whole I have a gun thing is cringe town
PavelMatsyuk
It's a shotgun with a tactical grip and an adjustable shoulder stock, but has a long barrel. Probably a pump as well. Odd choices.
Pencillin
"I have weird ideas about what it means for my daughter to reach sexual & emotional maturity, also a gun fetish"
WriteStuff
That's why I have a sword. Guns are so blase' A sword sends the message that I'm protective and possibly psychotic :-)
Ductapefordaysss
Yep, so when I my girlfriend's dad showed me his gun in some kind of pathetic attempt to intimidate me, I just took it apart haha
ecodude
Had a fun one when I was in hs, I knew the girl I was dating had a redneck dad, so I borrowed a friend's pickup with a gun rack in the back1
ecodude
and put a brand new 12gauge on it. When he threatened me with his, I just complimented him on it and pulled mine out. He thought I was Jesus
ecodude
Until his daughter and I broke up.
Mimsey
People that object to dads being more active in their kids' lives creep me out.
LeviDarni95
Shit the fuck up
Mimsey
*shits into the air*
buttermyarse
-Far more likely to encourage deceptive and rebellious behaviour if you act like that.
thelonepig
Be active in raising your children right, not teaching them all boys are bad and only want one thing.
rainevasquez
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/05/04/article-2620054-1D91E1BD00000578-35_634x791.jpg
buttermyarse
- enough to tell you what's going on rather than hide things from their psycho dad who can't take their 'little girl' growing up.
ProfessorMorifarty
That'd require open and frank discussion with their kids though, which is obviously taboo.
buttermyarse
Being active in your kids life doesn't mean you have to be a twat when they start growing up. Teens fuck. Wouldn't you rather they trust you
Mimsey
I'm just keenly aware of how the modern liberation trends are teaching teenagers they can do no wrong and that their parents are idiots.
lulurafa
I don't agree with this. Teens have always thought their parents are stupid in western culture. Then we grow up and realize we were wrong
Mimsey
I was responding to the implication that all of the dads above were like that. You can be protect AND supportive.
buttermyarse
It was never implied that all of these dads were like that. It was referring to the men who try to bully their daughters male friends.
Mimsey
And I deeply resent anyone that judges an involved, present father.
buttermyarse
That's not being involved and present. Its an excuse to throw their weight around. My partner is a fantastic dad, always there for his girl.
buttermyarse
2. But he would never act that way because he's not an 'alpha male' arsehole who views his daughter as his property.