Not-quite-October dump

Sep 18, 2019 7:23 AM

MountainManatee

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132342

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3253

Dislikes

118

#1 This is the NRA-approved ending

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

And the one breaking all the laws, torturing, killing was Bond. https://www.humanrightsfirst.org/senate-report-cia-torture

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

"Based on". You can fuck right off with that "based off of" shit.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#9 eating a lemon just to send a message.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#9: WHEN GOD GIVES YOU LEMONS, YOU FIND A NEW GOD!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#14 Do you want we should use the rope, the candlestick, or the wrench?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#4

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Definitely +1

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

What if I was rejected from hogwarts? Oh right... makes me a bard

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It’s true about halloween. Here in Germany we don’t celebrate it, and we basically go straight from Adolf Hitler day to christmas. Insane!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

White claw: flavorless wizard

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As a German I never came into Erklärungsnot due to our vocabulary.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

As a GLL, thanks for that journey of discovery of what Erklärungsnot is!

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Facebook tier

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Dogs name is Zest, great touch

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Leslie Jones couldn‘t conceivably portray James Bond.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

I miss Thanksgiving. It used to be its own holiday and held the line against Christmas creep. RIP Thanksgiving.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#2 With the previous Bonds present through the movie so you think it's one of them. They do "The Man Who Knew Too Little" routine.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Man I wish the Halloween one was still true. I saw Christmas stuff out a few weeks ago at a local dollar store.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Same here, at Costco yesterday.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#1

6 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

#10 you are a kansas person

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There are hills in Kansas.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

fine, nebraska? whichever flyover state is all flat and has nothing in it.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ok Bond is a person 007 is the designation. You can have 007 be anyone or anything but James Bond is James Bond with a history etc.

6 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

This is why no one invites you to the cinema.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 3

I wouldn't hang out with anyone who used the word cinema. That's the person who would put milk in a bowl prior to cereal.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

im never sure if need to put /s or not.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The comment on the cheetah one was too funny.

6 years ago | Likes 52 Dislikes 2

You’re right. Someone call the fun police at once!

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

#4 Thanksgiving couldn't hold the line, and Halloween is slowly dying via loss of interest in the actual event.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

adults love the excuse to dress up and have parties, so I don't think it's dying per se. kids don't go door to door anymore. H'ween grew up.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Its growing in mainland Europe though

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Says you! My family has been getting spooky since the 5th of July!

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's good to hear. Are they going to hand out candy?

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Possibly, I'm taking the kids Trick-or-Treating.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

All right I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons? Don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad!

6 years ago | Likes 59 Dislikes 5

I’d rather become the lemon kingpin and have that fabulous yellow suit and a guard dog named Zest.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

How so you give the lemons back? Forcefully insert them into a twat?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 3

You hire a team of scientists to make combustible lemons, then go burn life's house down.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You win

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I always say, “When life gives you lemons, squirt them in people’s eyes”

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Get even

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager!

6 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 2

Make life RUE the day it decided it could give *Cave Johnson* LEMONS.

6 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Make Life rue the day it though it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the guy who's gonna burn your house down.

6 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

WITH THE LEMONS

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

With the lemon ?

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

With the lemons!

6 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

I'll have my people engineer a combustible lemon!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I dated this girl who (surprise) had a messy room. I would walk in, walk out and ask if forensics had cleared the crime scene.

6 years ago | Likes 249 Dislikes 11

Wow, that was a surprise. I didn't see that twist at all!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

She was not amused.

6 years ago | Likes 136 Dislikes 3

Is she single?

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I have a messy room and would find that comment hilarious

6 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 0

Have you ever watched a girl get ready for anything? We start with a clean room then end up with clothes everywhere

6 years ago | Likes 53 Dislikes 3

You maybe I dont own many things my husbands and kids clothes are fucking everywhere

6 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 1

I feel this in my soul. Trying to clean, none of this shit is mine! Fuck you guys I'm throwing it all out.

6 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Wait why do you have a boyfriend if you’re married?! ;)

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 9

Dated, past tense, not am dating.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

Why don't you?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

She could be polyamorous.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

...

6 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 2

He was talking about some girl he dated. Not a married woman

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 5

#8 it's derived from city gates which were closed at night during medieval times, so you had to stay outside with bandits and beasts.

6 years ago | Likes 57 Dislikes 0

Right, like in Ocarina when you hit Hyrule Field for the first time and the day is JUST long enough to make it to Castle Town as long as >

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

> you know exactly where you're going and you book it. Otherwise, skeletons to you.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I don't understand the attention long german words get - mostly it's just that we combine 3 distinct words without using a hypen. Like 1/2

6 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

"Tor" "Schluss" and "Panik" literally could be translated into "gate" "closing" and "panic"...

6 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

Now do gemutlichkeit.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yes but the choice of those particular three words is so perfect for the thought... it’s like a poem.

6 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Precisely

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That’s what it says, yes

6 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Yeah, well that's the point. We (mostly) don't have silly long-ass words, only efficient and self-describing word combinations.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Is there a word for that?

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I think turning it into a compound word makes it more of a definite thing. We also do those in Finnish, and it's like if there's a common..

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

..compound word for a thing its existence as a concept is kind of solidified.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

If those words are around long enough, they gain meaning beyond their sub-words. That's the appeal I guess.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Thanks, never thought about that. Get it now.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Technically the wizards in Harry Potter are sorcerers. Wizards in D&D have no latent magical abilities.

6 years ago | Likes 397 Dislikes 8

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No, wizards learn and master magic. Some have it, others learn how to get it. Also, Hermione. Or any muggle.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 4

Ackshully.jpg

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

At first, but they start putting levels into wizard early on because it's easier to study spells than just figure them out on your own.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Wizards have to study and learn their magic. I believe D&D ones have to be attuned to magic first. HP wizzes match closer to D&D wizzes

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

What about that one guy who was doing wandless magic?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Items are irrelevant, it's either raw nature or knowledge

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That makes Dr Strange, the sorcerer, a D&D wizard cause he learnt it through study.

6 years ago | Likes 193 Dislikes 1

Yes

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Tony stark was right the whole time

6 years ago | Likes 58 Dislikes 2

The proper way to obtain magic. Through study.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That's what i had if a system makes this distinction. Wizard implies it's a learnable skill. Sorcerer implies there needs to be some innate

6 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

uncommon ability. I don't mean like some can sing and some can't. If both are there Sorcerer should be described as genius wizards.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

And Scarlet Witch is a sorcerer...

6 years ago | Likes 74 Dislikes 2

wasn't she experimented on in the MCU, as sony still owns mutants.?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's intentionally vague. But Fox owns mutants, and Disney now owns Fox.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

MCU Scarlet Witch got her powers from Mind Stone experiments. She's a warlock. Loki would be the sorcerer.

6 years ago | Likes 59 Dislikes 2

X-man Scarlet Witch, yes

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Seems arbitrary to me, like trying to define dragon. Its fiction and most people, including the author of Harry Potter, use whatever.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 11

No more arbitrary than distinguishing fighter from barbarian.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Agreed. They're mostly arbitrary.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 3

In the context of dungeons and dragons, there is a clear distinction.

6 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Harry Potter isn't D&D. And D&D doesn't define what the rest of us use in literature or whatever. D&D has its own rules. Still arbitrary.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 5

Nobody's petitioning Rowling to change every use of the word wizard. We have fun getting into technical details of dumb shit.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

It's not technical. It's D&D. No one cares except for D&D people.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Except this is a post about D&D and was sparked by a topic in the post comparing Harry Potter and D&D.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

That doesn't mean I'm wrong at all.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But its comparing Harry Potter to D&D

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

So?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Sounds like Harry Potter wizards are either arcanists or ultimate magus from D&D. Because they need to study and have latent talent.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Sorcerer's need to practice and use a focus otherwise the most they'll be doing is accidentally shitting fire or throwing a few cantrips

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

But they don't have arcane words, I thought they could get around the focus if they could wrap their minds around the concept of the 1/2

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Magic in their blood 2/2

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

D&D sorcerers have to use verbal spell components and use a focus or material components just like wizards, unless metamagic is used

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I thought the words just kinda came to them as they channeled their dragon/fey/outsider blood. And yeah, metamagic is what they are 1/2

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'd also be curious to ask which version of D&D we are discussing, because classes and races have progressed since their creation.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I would disagree as sorcerers never go to school to learn, 100% of their skills are innate and require no book learnin'.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Not always true, they still need to learn how to wield that power properly.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That's not true, a sorcerer player character has basic combat training and has to have drilled their spells to the point that they can -

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

fire off the complicated somatic and verbal components while literally dodging sword blows

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

a sorcerer's magical practice is more like how it works for most anime protagonists compared to a wizard's test-cramming

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I agree with you

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

They still have to learn to harness and direct their powers though. They don’t gain power through study, but they can channel it.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

a sorcerer practicing magic is literally them practicing bending the weave of magic to their desires, a wizard has to do lots of math

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

What are the defining traits differentiating sorcerers from wizards?

6 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

I thought that wizards could only do magic by using existing spells, which they learn, and sorcerers can tap into the raw power of magic 1/2

6 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

and can create new spells. According to most books they are the 7th son of the 7th son of a wizard, and are bringers of chaos. 2/2

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Sorcerors are born w/ magic or given it naturally by any amount of weird 7th son, divine, chaotic, or anything else. Wizards get it w/ book

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

wizards are learned magic, which is why average age of a wizard is 50-60. sorcerers obtain magic naturally through their bloodline.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

and when sorcerers use magic, it can have side effects called wild magic.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Generally that only happens if attempting to use a spell at a higher caster lvl than they could normally cast. I.e. using heighten spell

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Usually up to dms discretion tho

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I did not know this and have some strong words for my DM now

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Sorcerers are born with innate arcane magic whereas wizards have to acquire their magic through study.1/2

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

2/2 Warlocks must make a pact with a higher being to utilize magic and clerics gain power through their patron deity.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Are you implying demons are superior to Mankind?

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Well, I asked the voice in my head, and it said they are.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Wizards learn magic, sorcerers are born/gifted with it.

6 years ago | Likes 35 Dislikes 1

According to D&D.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Given the discussion is prompted by a meme that starts "Your D&D class", it would be the only relevant determining source.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Maybe it's Maybelline

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

molded by it.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

They did not pick up a book until they were already a man

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Sorcerers and druids are the only two main spell slingers that possess innate arcane magic. Clerics and Paladins utilize divine magic.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I'm fairly sure druids are (1) divine casters and (2) get their spells directly from nature, not innately from themselves.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Bard...?

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I'm under the impression that they are effectively minor wizards because they "pick up" a few spells from their travels.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

My theory is that bards are such good story tellers that the universe just goes along with their will sometimes because it is cooler

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Also their spell list is different from the wizard/sorcerer spell list, but they aren't divine either, so I would classify them as arcane.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ok, my only thought to that is that they don't have to memorize their spells the morning before they case. They cast like sorcerers.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Bard thinks how can he be more of a motherfucker, so he seduces the spells out of existence.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

lol

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0