2 years, 8 months and 2 Days Sober!

Back at my favorite hobby again - Shibari! KnottyButtGood of course

When I stopped over after my last ‘first’ final at my new giant university, she had lots of costumes laid out for the season and I thought ‘why the hell not’

I got Bs instead of As, but considering the other life factors that came into play this semester, I’m okay with it.

The flip to this position was unexpectedly successful! I had about a thousand backup plans to get here other ways, but it was very fun for my bottom too :) always the goal

This was supposed to be the pinnacle pose, but it was on bamboo so her legs ended up much closer together than I envisioned in my head - I have a plan for next time though. Kind of like my approach to next semester.

This first semester back with 46,000 other undergraduates was just…a lot. I had to live about an hour away from campus at first because of my lease situation, then after I finally moved in, first night all by myself - FLEAS. SO MANY FLEAS. In my perfect world - I’d have burned that place to the ground. But while taking my very rigorous advanced calculus and analytical chemistry courses, working and doing research - I found a new apartment and moved AGAIN after weeks of treating my stuff to make sure I didn’t bring the demons with me.

I’m in my new home less than a week - get a call from my mother’s lawyer…he needs me to talk to my mom about my sister, who is our mom’s primary caretaker. TLDR: she had stolen A LOT OF MONEY …for opioids. My sister has a history. I’m an addict - I knew something was wrong but selfishly chose to ignore the very obvious signs of drug dependence but I was BLINDSIDED by the money. So I took her to rehab, 1.5 hours before a midterm I dropped my sister off at a downtown detox, knowing that while she was getting the treatment she needed, I was going to become her caregiver - so I went and took my exam and carried on. Sorry to trauma dump.

I survived because I live my life like this sequence practice - i always adapt, I always respect the person in pain while maintaining calm control, I always have a backup plan. And sometimes not having a plan, unfortunately, becomes the plan and you have to fall back on love, empathy and integrity <3 all this and…

I’m.still.fucking.sober.

Be kind to each other this holiday season, especially those who struggle with alcohol or other substances - for gods sake, always have sparkling waters at your events!

Keep it weird
Botanist