RedSauceComedy
127909
6634
165
The wrong type of attention.
So this is the frontpage? send me pictures of ladies butts pls.
May 23, 2016 11:53 PM
RedSauceComedy
127909
6634
165
So this is the frontpage? send me pictures of ladies butts pls.
speakonlytruths
I like beards. But I do concur that women, or at least I can speak for myself, don't randomly compliment beards unless I know you.
GhostWith100Butts
Welcome to bear country.
Gonefishing
Grew mine for the admiration from men. That and laziness.
JudgeMentalCat
Don't knock the sausage till you've tried it ;)
BooRadleyLives
Dudes comment out of respect. Be patient; ladies who like beards will let you know in time. It's not for everyone.
PhoneHotdog
I'm a woman and I don't like beards. I think there's a divide - some do and some don't.
Giggity23
Grew a manbun for the ladies, mostly complements from men :/
jrntn
pssst, "Nice manbun, DORK!" isn't a compliment
hiyesthisissatan
Bro of we're noticing then the women are too.
KnightRyder
I grew a beard because it honestly just gave me more confidence in me, which in turn caused everything else to come more easily.
KnightRyder
Still get a million compliments from dudes, though
imscaryterrybittch
themanthemyththecharles
A grew a beard and bought an old Ford Bronco. I get ALL the male attention. Nice dudes and all but... yeah.
EmoryToss17
This is how beards work. The whole trend is just something guys have convinced each other looks good.
notenoughmail
Some people like them and some don't. Some like longer and some like shorter. But you are wrong.
BurnsDream
AY FUK U BISH
wwtwo
Some don't need to compensate for their manliness
Whackjob
Dude, it's all about the beard you have inside you.
cboxchamp
Grow the beard for yourself op. Then you'll get the ladies
dirtcreature
You made your mouth look like a 70s vagina
SpeakingAsTheDevilsAdvocate
My work has been called strongly vaginal
HerbertQuain
Seeing a shaved/waxed vagina makes me feel like a pedophile. But I realise that might be a case for an unpopular opinion puffin...
ExamRoom4
Beards are a guys version of makeup.
CavendishBandana
I grew a nice handlebar moustache and the same thing happened
Cupcakemonger
I came here to say the same exact thing haha
Aceituna
As a lady, I find a beard sexy, but I don't want it near any of my soft parts.
DilbertGrape
ItsOnlyAMile
Try a man bun. That'll probably work.
BedsideTiger
barktreep
Why are these people so fucking stupid? It's a 21st century mullet. We finally got over the stupid baggy clothes of the 90s and now this.
tyconle
It's a reverse mullet, long on the top, short on the sides, whereas a mullet is long on the sides, short on top, either is UGLY AF
ShamelessOToole
Thought that was gone already
starkart
I hate them from the bottom of my heart
CaptainJackSbarro
Ugh no! DO NOT TRY A MAN BUN. I am but a singlular woman and I can attest to my great displeasure at seeing a man bun. Ugliest thing ever.
FishPotatoesOil
Singlular :P
ShannonMartens
women admire beards from afar - the closer you get the itchier they are
jrhawk42
ahh the padded bra of masculinity.
ferdturguson
Saw a dude that looked like a lumber jack on the side of the road. His BMW SUV had a flat tire and he was watching the service guy change it
Nearlyburly
Oh! Haha! Nice!
graehall
Holy shit, what a nifty assessment.
TheodoreWitchfucker
Your comment is the one that made me laugh and agree.
Squanch
Nah it just covers enough of my cheeks to make my general facial structure become more proportionally appealing. No masculinity issues.
classicwinger
He wasn't referring to "masculinity issues", he meant that a beard is the male version of the padded bra.
Squanch
I just realized the original comment may have meant beards are like padded bras meant to attract other mens attention? Im still unsure..
TheodoreWitchfucker
Hmmm, but that's exactly what a person with masculinity issues would say...
Squanch
That's exactly the assumption I'd expect from a witch fucker
TheBananaTrain
It's quite clear, fate has you dating men.
jherazob
Fate has spoken! It said: "BLOOD AND THUNDER!"
Hayeksplosives9451
Use lube, then it's just thunder.
scorpio264
Says "The Banana Train" I think that is called transference.
TheBananaTrain
Trainsference
ILikedTheirOldStuffBetter
I ran into the same thing when I bought my first Harley. The ladies couldn't care less, nothing but dudes complimenting & asking questions.
annelions
If a dude who rides only motorcycles asked me out, my first thought would be that he'd need to be picked up from his house before each date.
TheodoreWitchfucker
As oppose to what, he pick you up? Why not just agree to meet somewhere?
annelions
I would like to have at least ONE fancy dinner at some point. That kind of windswept look doesn't go so well with fancy dinners.
RedSauceComedy
I've had this beard for about 2 years now, there are some female compliments because i look like Tormund from GOT but its mostly guys.
Mx7733
In this day and age where men are portrait as incompetent, idiotic creatures, the beard sends the opposite message, it confuses them.
sharksarethebest
I'm gonna need evidence on that statement @OP
RedSauceComedy
http://imgur.com/GqBZlJA
kardingharding
You're lacking on the length for two years op
sharksarethebest
You do look like him <3 Your beard is fucking awesome and no, I don't have a dick.
RedSauceComedy
Did you lose it in an accident?
sharksarethebest
Fuck! Could that be the reason why parents keep hiding my baby pictures?
ArmorcladCowboy
The wild look kinda works for you but try taming that beast a little and the ladies may give more vocal approval.
ITalkAboutGoats
Not a fan of beards huge beards, especially unkept ones, you're good looking though, so you've got that going for you.
RedSauceComedy
Thats a post shower, pre grooming shot.
ITalkAboutGoats
Still not a fan.I've dated guys with beards, and it feels like kissing pubic hair every time we mushed faces, not a pleasant sensation.
storyoftheviper
I like that you're making "the face" +1
ItalianaNrd
And a ginger to boot!
javaMakesMeAnxious
I've never heard a woman complaining about how her man can't grow a beard. Only men themselves do that. It's a big deal for men, not women.
[deleted]
[deleted]
javaMakesMeAnxious
I'm not dude.
Miierin
Dude I'm not
Left4Henke
Nope. I've heard plenty of women talking about their boyfriends not being able to grow a beard. It can be a big deal. But mostly for men.
Daynaj
I would be apprehensive about dating a guy that couldn't grow a beard.
javaMakesMeAnxious
Really? Why? If I may ask.
Daynaj
That's just something I'm attracted to. Even if they don't always like having one, it's nice to have the option.
P0sterNutbag
Go with the men! They're better lovers anyway.
thisisnttuna
no... women are. :p
INSANITYisTEMPORARY
Ahem.... Excuse me ??
StankyPankySammich
Hah was at pride fest with some friends and had multiple men hit on me,or they're girlfriends hit on my for them.It actually felt nice lol.
notenoughmail
Being lusted after is an awesome feeling even if you're not interested in them back. Until they get rapey.
DeadOnionSaysWhat
Men are better lovers w/ other men, not w/ women.
notenoughmail
I can't refute this as I have no experience with men, but until yesterday I might have agreed with you. I met a damn fine woman 1/x
notenoughmail
who is making me think otherwise. 2/x
topherrobin
Yep. Men knows what men want
notenoughmail
But I cannot provide myself with that.
greenking13
Just another thing we're better than women at.
greenking13
Pls, don't kill me, I do not mean it, I am simply referring to that stupid woman of the year thing.
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
Except for Tim. He's a dick.
Noodlemanny
Yeah! Fuck Tim! Literally!
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
I would, but he's a piece of shit. :/
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
S'okay. We all giggled.
BoatmanII
Being gay is a choice?!?
beaubrent
No, but flexibility is.
Flyndaran
I think gymnasts that spent a lifetime practicing would say that flexibility is harder than mere choice.
aluskn
They chose to practice.
Treblaine
Dude, who said you had to be gay to have sex with dudes? Have you not heard of a little thing called; The US Navy?
Treblaine
By analogy, Stephen Fry has had sex with a woman... not because it's his preference but because it was "euuuu why not, how bad can it be?"
ampleapple
Yes and no.
HelpfulHomo
no--but its ok boatmanII. Its ok. ::pet::
Winterous
Fucking hell I wish it was.
FelixG
a blowjob is a blowjob bruh, just remember to say no homo after!
daguq
But what about the beard rubbing your balls?
FelixG
You mean keeping them nice and warm? Its being considerate!
ButtholeMarsBarDispenser
No but fucking someone is. Just close your eyes.
SweatyNuN
'But fucking'. Butt fucking. Mmmmm butt fucking.
ShlongaDonga
Hey, If the balls don't touch...
Mavgurian
Then you are doing it wrong.
SweatyNuN
We need to go deeper
jag00
Heyoo
BoatmanII
Oh thanks for the clarification.
asdfertjryjre
Yes, because it's so easy to imagine a woman when your asshole is being ripped open.
BigIrishGuy
Dude... I get that too. I even had another dude hand me a card that said: great facial hair. With some kind of beard club thing. WTAF.
Kevinmaloneismyspiritanimal
Infiltrate them!
BigIrishGuy
I think you might just want to see me rub my beard against somdone else's beard...
Jefferspin
Men that cannot grow facial are given these cards after puberty. If you cut it you are supposed to give it to a beardless friend
BigIrishGuy
The guy that gave this too me looked like he'd be into rubbing our beards together and maybe touching tips.
wherearemybedframescrews
If it makes you feel better I stumbled on a beard convention thing in a pub and turns out, Australian beard club raises $ for kids, no homo
haveyouheardabouttheseinternetmemes
SAME! I've had total strangers gush over my beard until it was uncomfortable.
AMonkeyInASuit
"WTAF"? What The Ass Fuck? Want Tongue Assimilated Further? Wonderwall Torture Assaults Tunnitis? Wakka Tackbard Allahu Fucktard?
randomguy84
What the actual Fuck... if you're seriously confused. Otherwise I say we vote for Want Tongue Assimilated Further.
thirdeyez
You don't live in the Minnesota area do you. We have a beard off every year. Curious if it was that
BigIrishGuy
Nope. I'm currently living and working in the desert.
ItalianaNrd
In the desert with a beard? Doesn't it get awfully hot?
SaciPerere
I had someone stop me in the street and pray for my beard. He laid his hands straight into it and said a blessing.
lifeisapicnic
Women probably go to the beard club too though man http://cdn.theatlantic.com/assets/media/img/mt/2015/11/173_image/lead_960.jpg?1448923903
Leo1293
First rule of Beard Club, don't talk about Beard Club.
raviolihummingbird
Nah, you're confusing that one with the fight clu- GODDAMNIT
ILikedTheirOldStuffBetter
Nice
DidItForScience
Well I'm reporting you for talking about something you shouldn't have.
BigIrishGuy
"Why did you shave that other dudes beard off???" "I wanted to destroy something beautiful"
garrotinho
But sir, in project beard, we don't have razors
gayducks
His name was beardie mcbeardson
UpsetFace
"Shave" was putting it kindly... Ever seen what a corn on the cob spinning at 2000rpm does to long hair?
justanotherpuma
Pics or you're a big fat phony
BigIrishGuy
http://m.imgur.com/account/BigIrishGuy/images/1xqcKO1 that might work, or... my bio in my profile...
justanotherpuma
I was more so looking for the card itself. I've never heard of anything like that.
EverythingISeeIsAJojosReference
Unless there's blackjack and hookers, then just start your own beard club.
ExamRoom4
Need pictures for proof
NoIdidntsayAbeLincolnIsaidHeyBlinkin
I dont. Some dude shows up on my IG feed is part of one of these beard clubs and posts beard modeling pics
ExamRoom4
Okay...?
NoIdidntsayAbeLincolnIsaidHeyBlinkin
Haha just verifying the story to say I dont need proof as Ive seen evidence of these card-carrying beard-club folks elsewhere
ExamRoom4
Oh, I was really more looking for evidence of the beard haha
BigIrishGuy
Of my beard? It's on my profile. Of the dude that gave me the card? Sorry I didn't snap a pic of him for posterity sake
NipplesInAJar
Epic beard, bro. Epic.
BigIrishGuy
Thanks. I'd like to say it's been hard work but... it just kinda grows there.
ExamRoom4
Mostly just want to see the beard.
BigIrishGuy
http://m.imgur.com/account/BigIrishGuy/images/1xqcKO1
deutsch5
Not gonna lie, it's a pretty awesome beard!
BigIrishGuy
Thank you. You have no beard... but incredibly beautiful eyes. So.. there!
deutsch5
Oh shit! Mutual creeping! Haha well thank you :)
Firsthope
As a girl, u have a nice beard. We don't compliment beards usually. It's like a guy saying nice haircut. Just kinda odd.
BigIrishGuy
Hey thanks!
DoritosAndSoul
But you do like them, RIGHT?!
Firsthope
It depends on how well groomed they are. When they are all crazy, not so much. Well groomed ones are attractive:)
observationalist
Here's the truth: Women overwhelmingly do NOT like beards. There I said it.
haveyouheardabouttheseinternetmemes
True, but the one's who like it REALLY like it.
SweatyNuN
Nah if its clean and doesn't look messy its fine. If it stank and isn't trimmed well then its a bit poop. Then again I'm a guy.
notenoughmail
Not in my experience... I don't know what the ratio is but seems like a lot of ladies like some facial hair even it's just stubble.
notenoughmail
A lot of time they just don't want the scratchy face kisses.
Jerbaderba
Huh, scratchy face kisses is what made my girlfriend change her mind in favor of beards.
notenoughmail
Well you're in luck. I converted my ex though . She was against at first. Grew it out some and it was softer. 1/x
notenoughmail
My friend's wife wont let him grow one for that reason though. 2/x
observationalist
Stubble is one thing...a little scruff is kinda manly. The full on hipster haypile imgur worships now...unattractive to the majority.
observationalist
There have been studies done on this. By a strong majority, women prefer clean shaven men. Something about seeing facial cues easier.
notenoughmail
I guess we beardist make better liars then. :) Evolutionary advantage?
HerbertQuain
Here's my experience: I consulted several women (including gf) on whether to shave my beard, and the only one in favour was my mother.
javaMakesMeAnxious
I think it also depends on how long it is.
observationalist
Were any of those women planning to fuck you?
HerbertQuain
Haha, in my gf's case case I hope so, in my mother's I hope not. The others... Who knows, I didn't ask.
HerbertQuain
Was your statement exclusive to physical contact? As in "I don't like kissing bearded men"? Or aesthetic? Perhaps we need to differentiate.
imnotsorry123
Heres the truth: Men overwhelmingly get beard for THEMSELVES. There i said it.
observationalist
Hey, if he likes it, more power to him. But he was bitching about lack of attention from the ladies.
throw183
Here's another: BE AN AWESOME HUMAN BEING no matter what. Facial hair or not.
imnotsorry123
no
classicwinger
Which is fine, but then they shouldn't get upset when most women don't like their beards.
observationalist
Precisely.
cheesypoofs
The premise of this post is that this guy got the beard for the ladies, which is probably why observationalist mentioned it
observationalist
You are correct sir.
IRatherChangeMyName
Not the right reason to grow a beard. My reason: laziness.
crimson23locke
Grew mine for the same reason, kept it for the last 5 years cause the wife won't let me shave it off.
qindje
My reason, my dad rocked a nice beard, I was jelly at 10. Grew a beard at 20, never looked back. It just doesn't feel right without...
TehBubblez
I grew facial hair just so I don't have a baby face any more
kujie
My reason was because in highschool my classmates kept telling me to shave it so I didn't out of spite.
tactleneckwantsants
Laziness v. Hatred of my own hair. The daily battle.
TheKnightsWatch
My reason, cause beards are fucking boss
Nechronic
I spend way more time grooming than I ever did shaving
ContinuallySenseless
I grew mine 'cause I looked like an idiot when I started going bald. End result: I look like an homeless alcoholic. Lose/lose situation here
abcdefghijkELEMENOHPEE
See this is why I don't compliment a guy's beard.. Unless it's full-blown lumberjack, it's hard to tell if it was on purpose or not..
sputnikrogissortofacunt
Yep.
DraugTheWhopper
Yarp
UrsaUrsa
My reason was really sensitive skin... and the ladies. Lots of compliments from other dudes tho. But my girl loves it as well, so worth it.
SPART1CUS
Mine is for cheapness. Just get it trimmed when I get my hair cut.
MrMusclePants
Laziness from heartbreak for me. Now I look better than before.
eromitlab
Laziness here too. Plus a general dislike of shaving.
IvnWng
I keep my face neat and clean. My reason:I'm Asian and I can't grow a fucking beard to save my life
CabooseKbuse
GrandOppai
My reason: Prostitute shield. I was living in Hamburg. Lots of hookers. They go for the innocent looking ones (i.e. me). Beard = Danger.
Illumian85
Laziness, the real source of the popular stubble beard.
jbird84
Difference between beard and bum. Ya cant be lazy with a good beard
TimberWolf141
Unshaven for 2-3 years for the exact same reason.
BanditBurrito
I've had a beard since I was 16 and I'm honestly afraid to see what my unshaven face looks like
ahairyHoneymonster
I'm sure I have a face but after all these years who knows what's under there. Dimples? Bum chin? Lost tribes?
MilesTailsFlower
Don't you mean your shaven face? lol
SterlingMaloryArcherr
Same boat and I'm with you.
Starlord2591
Like a ten year old boy. 25 now, with my beard I look 35. Without it, I'm 5
SterlingMaloryArcherr
24 with a beard that has grey in it, people think I'm around 30. I'm sure without the beard I'd look 15.
Jayhatesspidersandshit
As a 25 year old with a beard can confirm
ModernDayBabaYaga
Me too!
nicetomeetyouimdad
i can go a month or two before it gets annoying, then i shave it back down to stubble and start over again. source: i am lazy
KittensArePeopleToo
As a bearded man: shampoo and especially conditioner are your friend. And hair oil. Treat yo beard like a princess.
nicetomeetyouimdad
im too lazy to do that. source: im lazy
ToSquirrelsImNuts
I do the exact same thing. When I do shave, people always ask "Why'd you shave your beard?" "It got in the way when I'm eating."
GrimRiderJ
Wait 3 months then hit a barber an have him shape it. You'll never go back
OmgOptimized
So you're saying the barber will do a bad job?
nicetomeetyouimdad
sadly i haven't found a good barber near me yet...
TwoBallsOnePenis
You poor man! What did that horrible barber do to you?!
NipplesInAJar
And this is the place I'd put my beard. IF I HAD ONE!!!
END3RW1GGIN
If men notice so do women. Women just don't usually randomly complement men.
[deleted]
[deleted]
END3RW1GGIN
You're hanging with the wrong females...
Dingleberryslim
Why the fuck not?
Napsaremymistress
I had a woman compliment me on my tattoos today. Felt good.
DontBiteTheTip
Moms are great.
PitchforkSalesperson
I think that in young women, many don't really like beards, especially big ones
whosaidjehovah
To get compliments on your beard the beard must complement you.
elbdms
I want to compliment OP. Please post beard OP!
jrhawk42
Random women compliment me all the time... so do random men. I'm pretty sure just everybody wants to sleep w/ me though.
rudejohn
I think women complement men in many ways. http://grammarist.com/usage/complement-compliment/
TomIsMyDog
Men can take random compliments as affection. Which isn't always the intention.
surrealizations
I have long hair and get compliments from men and women all the time as a guy
HusbandsBulge
Yeah, feel like it's bonding thing, one of the easier things to give strangers praise for. Maybe gotten two female mentions over >10 years.
ArmorcladCowboy
I've had both complement my facial hair at about the same rate. But more men ask to touch my mustache.
NoelleWorthman
I'd feel weird complimenting a guy on his beard but I admire the shit out of beards
shutard
There's something to be said for being attractive in the first place.
JeepersMedia
Women constantly ask to stroke my beard! But it is unusual!
deussu
Are you a stereotypical canadian? You sure look like one.
gangstanick
That's what a stereotypical Canadian looks to u?the fuck?
isvara
Maybe not on beards, but they sure love to compliment people on accents. I also have a beard, so I get it from both.
oceanskysforever
Women don't tend to like facial hair. The scruffy look is usually more popular. A big-ass beard just gets in the way.
youthrewoffmygroove
As a woman, i honestly don't know what a "good" beard is. I'm not honestly sure if i'd notice a good one if it swooshed me in the face.
ExamRoom4
I always compliment a nice beard.
END3RW1GGIN
Every time I look in the mirror!
Mordorwinterknights
gottem
BewilderedBeaver
I did once. He had a really nice beard and I told him so and then showed him a picture of me from 8years ago, when I had a similar one.
BewilderedBeaver
He seemed happy.
TheodoreWitchfucker
mtf?
BewilderedBeaver
Ay.
TheodoreWitchfucker
mamadoom
They should. It's a nice feeling when you tell a guy "hey nice face/beard/tattoos" and they look all cute and surprised.
END3RW1GGIN
Agreed. I love it when anyone complements me.
ItalianaNrd
Should we? Randomly compliment men? It wouldn't come off creepy or make you think we just want in your pants?
END3RW1GGIN
Not to me. Except the getting in my pants part. But I'm OK with that.
idownvoteplottwist
I get complimented so rarely I'd probably think you want in my pants.
itsppearsyoucanindeed
It makes me feel warm and fuzzy, but tbh im usually so surprised to get a compliment i just stutter something unintelligble. Still nice tho
RevolutionOnHerLips
Random girls yelled a compliment about my dreads in college. That was a decade ago and I still think of it fondly.. I don't get compliments
nikseen
Depends on the individual tbh. Last time a got a random compliment it made my day, even though it was only like: "That is awesome! k bye."
elbdms
In my experience it goes like this - Me: hi | Dude: she wants me.
AlrightKeepYourSecrets
As a dude any compliments would likely be seen as flirting.
Jerbaderba
I've had girls randomly come up to me, compliment my hair, took my thanks, and walked off. It can be a great confidence booster :)
Howdoilife
Why can't everyone compliment everyone all the time? What would make you think we wouldn't want compliments? Women like them why not us?
xmsbeanx
I like to compliment ppl randomly bc it feels good to make someone else feel good :)
DVSBSTrD
Well they bloody well should. We're insecure about our appearance too :(
JeSuisIvre
I think because men think we're flirting if we compliment them.. So we usually try to avoid it
Last1augh
I see that too. I'm open minded so I just take the compliment. I see buddies falling victim to "just a compliment" type situations. Tragic.
JeSuisIvre
But if I like like a man I will compliment the shit out of him
DVSBSTrD
Thank you! :D
HeWhoPours
also: not all women like beards from what I've seen. Not sure why people think it's instant sexy
HereUseMyHandkerchief
"Instant sexy" that made me crack up
poochyena
So, like, every individual person has their own preferences? who knew.
Kiore
I see a wide range of preferences among women but the beard fad in general is a guy's fashion thing, not for the ladies primarily.
HeWhoPours
2/ Beards can be annoying as hell to grow depending on the person, myself included which is why i don't go much passed a week stubble
HeWhoPours
Agreed completely, which is why I don't understand people being surprised that they get compliments from men rather than women. 1/
ITalkAboutGoats
As a lady: I hate the current beard trend, they look awful, and feel worse.
oceanskysforever
DITTOOOOOO
0utrider
If well groomed and cared for, beards can be super soft and feel great.
McGreed
What's worse is the painted on eye browns that some women seem to have. They look like a cartoon parody when they do that.
ITalkAboutGoats
No, that's just as bad
HeWhoPours
think it's just more vocals coming out like "OMG that beard so fucking hot oh god," that gives this impression. I know plenty that don't 1/
HeWhoPours
2/ like them. I would wear a beard majorly/occasionally if it was up to my standards.
ITalkAboutGoats
It's like kissing unkept pubic hair, not a pleasant sensation.
HeWhoPours
I imagine, that's why I don't blame anyone for not liking them. I do, but don't grow one out of convenience
extahsee
+1, agreed.