WholeWheatMemes
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Jun 18, 2017 3:32 PM
WholeWheatMemes
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96
Switch75
"Do you want a kiss?" "Yes." *leans in* "I meant the chocolate..."
imgurcommocrugmi
That's almost as good as this one time when a joke from Rick and Morty happened to my dad, then a joke from Seinfeld, then everyone clapped.
Salmonsnake
When someone tries to capitalise when using capslock does anyone else imagine their voice breaking at the start of the sentence?
psrobyn
My favorite is, "That was like making love under a canopy." "How so?" "It was f**king in-tents!"
azazyel
#1 that's a Monty Python joke about American beer.
Ryutohara
wow these are all fake
IMGURN3WB
#5 was cute, but #6 OMG!
selkyselk
Gotta love when someone posts their mega-dump of reports and two days later someone picks out 8% of that dump and reports in a mixed order.
NeneJPhilly
Upvoting for adorable grandpa.
AlexDuos
Okay the tadpole one is cute.
Daaabloons
But they're mosquito larvae. Sleep tight.
izzmonster
Would you look at that. A bunch of stuff that probably didn't happen
gandalfv314159
#2 cause it's TOTALLY Mickey Mouse's job to care for someone passed out instead of a paramedic or some park official, standard procedure
TrapsMightBeGay
If a guy did #6 to a girl he be suspended at the speed of light not praised
ladyjayinator
Well I can't imagine why a girl would tickle a random guy's chin and yell, "Ball's on your chin!" Can you?
Nomulus
Wait, why?
TrapsMightBeGay
Because most of the time girls can hit guys and get away with it, and guys can't. Notice how I said most, not all, of the time
Nomulus
Ah, I misunderstood the comment. I thought guys would be getting suspended for the chin tickle thing which seems a bit extreme.
TrapsMightBeGay
It does
SoberAndBored
"Fucking close to water" is a Monty Python joke about American beer.
ISayFuckAllTheTime
As someone who knows about the difference between alcohol by volume and alcohol by weight, this misconception annoys me.
Snooj
And as a dad, I can attest we all grew up with Monty Python so it still counts as a dad joke on a technicality.
leaderlesslurker
I think that joke is as old as the hills in fairness. Picts probably said it about Roman wine.
IllusivePanda
Vigotorix this wine reminds me of having sex on a longship. It's fucking close to water
wannagohome
as an american, sounds about right.
IHateYouAll69
Wrong. There's so much good beer around. Also, stop being fucks and talking shit about beer, just drink it. No one cares.
wannagohome
i hate you too! have a great day!
wannagohome
Vertemasse
You're a good one as far as Yanks go then mate :) have my upvote
NullReference
Don't drink domestics. There is so much good beer in the us now.