smirkingwhoreofchicago
48524
2025
75
Jun 8, 2016 7:31 PM
smirkingwhoreofchicago
48524
2025
75
Alcard
Meh
Rips4w
I poured myself a bowl of cereal and opened the fridge. No milk! ::everybody around the campfire screams::
ZachPutland
THEN WHO WAS PHONE
RandAIFlagg
meh
SharkyMcSnarkface
I found the last man on earth. His reply: M'lady.
Dhadgar
Yeah grammatical errors scare me as well.
amishmistress
As a mother, #11 is one of my worst fears.
keikikahuna
"I saw this before. Now I'm gonna downvote it."
DocDolphin
I thought it was my family. They were dead. -Almost all of these
Gazorpgazorpfield
Nice, I didn't want to sleep anyway
completelyunreIated
Things was normal. Then they wasn't no more.
frogblasttheventcore
It strange that Nickelback tickets were suddenly in my pocket. Stranger still was that I went despite have functioning ears.
CopiousAmountsofForeskin
They warned me not to eat from Taco Bell. Then the rumbling began.
AnIdiotWhoShouldBeShot
When you only got time for a little bit of spook. Also a lot of them just end up in "but they were dead all along!!!" which is kind of lame.
TheDad101
#7 I'd see as more heartbreaking, not horror.
Redbrickadam
Actually I imagined this as a man yelling at a grave because he hasn't slept in a week. "god damnit honey just shut up for one night"
RedFortuna
Way too many 'I saw someone I know. BUT THEY WERE DEAD!!!' stories.
IridescentLotus
True story. I yelled at my cat to stop playing with the bags in my closet...and then saw her sleeping in the hallway.
mechanubis
After I was skinned and buried alive by a psychopath, I began to regret spending my third wish on immortality.
tizme
Daymn!
Vairbear
I was about to fap before this post. Vibe murdered.
WorkerBee88
That's a terrible story.
Tuvano
I once took a massive poo. When I wiped there was nothing on the toilet paper!
Hector514
spoopy
Hector514
spoopy
thisisastupidname
I paid all my bills. Then, there were more bills.
Geewhizdude
I just pee'd a little.
bellzack
I pulled out. She still got pregnant
EasyAgaton
I live alone.
thatguyukno
...and then the IRS sent an auditor.
sonoshitthereiwas
Thanks, I didn't want to sleep tonight anyway.
clutchthepearls
NZSheeps
Xsiah
The scariest stories are always the "it could happen to you" types.
lostsincethemomentigothere
Truly the ultimate tale of terror.
NotThatOneTheOtherOne
Xiutehcuhtli
As a father of 4, that's the real horror story right there.
DarthBaneoftheSith
Or turning off lights you turned off 2 minutes earlier
Iwontremberthis
This is why dads torment kids. Avenging all the lights that have been left on.
mushroomking
I lived alone for a while, I remember waking up once and the light was on. I know it wasn't on when I went to sleep. Still have no idea why.
hardytardigrade
There's a scary ghost. Oh no
ChemicalPizza
oooOOOoOoo
caffynater
If I reach for the light and there's another hand there, I'm lacing our fingers and making intense eye contact.
tizme
Unless it’s Thing, from the Addams Family.
caffynater
Then I’m just licking it.
aveshsharma
trump is going to be your president. period.
K4rlss0n
US elected Nixon and Reagan. I think they will survive Trump.
FoundTheSunshine
Thank god I'm reading these in the middle of the day!
JPminer814
Im trying to go to bed here...
TheSaintedPhysicianDoctor
*laugh/crying from 10:30PM.* well let's see if I can't forget it in the next couple hours then
catsandowlscatsandowls
Still scared me
MoisturizeMeCaptain
"He did a thing. BUT HE DED"
GenuinelyCurious
Up you go.
KawaiiPotatoGirl
*Whilhelm scream*
TheJerkNessMonster
I'm really unimpressed with these. They're all rather deadpan
Conv
THEN WHO WAS PHONE?
Hector514
The whole post resumed.
NotThatOneTheOtherOne
TheLimpinBiscuit
It's a coma.
sicsided
Machinist
The1Freeman
Sounds like a good horror game
Penishat
That be great, just one horror line ending with them waking up, going about a normal day then the cycle starts anew.
FreddieJerkFury
Groundhog day
Lunardose
The many deaths of Ian stone, I believe it's called. Similar.
MilDravin
50 first naps
Recaffeinated
Fight Club
bored0ne
Reminds me of P.T.
HighlandPrideHides
Inception?
itsfunnythatwordsmeanthings
#2 is one sentence
[deleted]
[deleted]
GrootieTootie
Fun times
GrizzlyWicks
ffs now i have to scroll back up
GrizzlyWicks
yea he's right
RetirementNoirATaleOfPruneJuiceAndMurder
#1 asshole room mate #2 wind #3 PTSD #4 at a party #5 lesbian moms #6 stare at adjacent dog #7 last minute save with checking the pulse /1
RetirementNoirATaleOfPruneJuiceAndMurder
#8 cannibalism love stories #9 day at the beach #10 3 dogs #11 adventures in babysitting #12 red bull #13 advanced escape rooms /2
RetirementNoirATaleOfPruneJuiceAndMurder
#14 Schizophrenia is a serious disorder, seek help #15 CPR #16 surprise party with poor timing #17 that's how mirrors work /3
RetirementNoirATaleOfPruneJuiceAndMurder
#18 don't piss off the wife #19 twins #20 mouse in bathroom cabinet #21 loud neighbaby #22 double vision and you're the blurry one /4
RetirementNoirATaleOfPruneJuiceAndMurder
#23 split level homes suck #24 shout louder to the guy next to you #25 body pillow #26 world champion #27 congrats you're a precog!
tizme
#18 don’t piss off the wife. Had me laugh, an ugly laugh, but it was real. Thanks, these were fun!
januskincaid
I am upvoting all of these, congratulations.