RedOvermorrow
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Storytime.
I wrote a book last year. Some people read it for me. One person got back to me today, many months later. I won't go into too much detail, since their story isn't mine to tell, but they said my book wound up being important to them on their gender journey, and I was really touched.
I always had some hangup about coming out publicly as nonbinary, but this really got me thinking about why. And I realized that my problem was never with me, or my gender, or any fear that I'd, like, go back on it or something. My worries were all with how the world would see and treat me. And I'm not responsible for the world. I'm responsible for me. And besides that, my therapist said I'm allowed to try on the identity to see if it fits. And the only way to try is to try, you know? So I just did it. They gave me the push I needed. If they could do what's best for them, then I can too.
Anyway. Comment with your best nonbinary memes. I know they must exist, and I need to build up a stockpile.
DKConstant
It's pronounced "tay-ah-tee-may."
skapanda616
SwedishChef350
Bluekitten03
Here's another!
cptsilver
we call non binary computers quantum, can we do the same? the name is kind of cool. I think it will be more powerfull, calling yourself "something" and not "*not* something", you know
BulgogiBolognese
New quantum gender just dropped
motherfluffer
How does a nonbinary samurai kill someone?
motherfluffer
THEY /slash/ THEM
Jaxotea
CiaranMcHale
You can try comforting a grammar pedant with "There, their, they're".
TrustMeImADog
Isn't the whole point of coming out because you DO care how the world sees you, and you want THEM to identify you in a certain way? Not wishing to be anything but supportive here, but I think you could also do with someone telling you it's ok to be concerned with how others see you. We all are. We like to think the way we see ourselves is mirrored by others, or it undermines how we see ourselves. It's reassuring to be recognised and "seen".
Jaxotea
RummageSaleBubbler
Programming's gonna be hard now.
TheWojoPL
Congrats on coming out!
CleverSquirrel
CarbyD
Bruh, dude and my guy are also gender non-specific
ShaunDreclin
Letting yourself try on an identity to see if it fits is such a big thing.
Bluekitten03
Here's one!
Wryat
This just hurts as a spanish speaking non-binary...
But congrats on experimenting and coming out!
wadenelson
As a computer guy I always wonder if this means you're analog.
BulgogiBolognese
nah, fuzzy logic ftw!
PoliticalWanderer
1) Well, for more heartfelt stuff, there's this that a friend of mine made:
pareidoliaperson
Now I'll read it as bidet.
DoctorSciencePothead
GemsAreOutrageousTrulyTrulyTrulyOutrageous
Be they as they may...
PoliticalWanderer
2) There's always this classic:
PoliticalWanderer
3) And for a bit of funny, there's this:
sirava
Build a positronic computer?
graehall
PoliticalWanderer
Hey, Grae. Hope you're having a good day. đ
graehall
I am, cause I love seein' mah memes get shared
liveOffOfDownVotes
So hex or decimal?
GuggelPlayer
ay yo you just gonna leave and not give us the link to your book because for some this is 1st time seeing stuff like this. Also good for you <3 proud of you!
annonymouse211
Pretty sure "ya boy" is open source and universally appropriate.
RulesOfImgur
boi/gurl are acceptable replacements for boy/girl if there is any doubt. "ya boy" is already gender neutral, as is "attaboy"
SeanBeanJovi
MileysVirus
We used to call our dealer dudeman to keep it low profile but later our connect was female, and to this day we still call her dudelady.
frostybox
Yup. Dude, homie, âhey assholeâ. Itâs all non-binary.
RulesOfImgur
Non-binary boi here, can confirm.
Klpincoyo
The husband greets our kids with, "What's up fuckers" because it's non binary. We have two NB kiddos. Our kids are adults so no small minds have been warped.
wherethehorriblethingsare
My best friend and I are different genders but call each other 'bro' all the time, gender is what you make of it. Good people understand that and support you.
mouseasw
mouseasw
FetteredJuvenescence
Don't call me out like that man, I'd be the one on the left if I could.
SomethingNiceAndSimple
I just figured out I'm NB too. Still working out how or if I'm going to come out to my family. I told my close friend group, and they've been nothing but supportive and loving. I don't think my parents will get it, but will likely be accepting. Other friends, and my partner, can come off as pretty queer-phobic. I don't think it's from anything hateful, just fear of the unknown. I worry they'll treat me differently. But I'll cross or burn that bridge when I get to it
Harbltron
SomethingNiceAndSimple
SableFox7
Congrats! I realised I'm NB (he/they) this year, and I still like boy/guy/dude etc, I'm just not a man
morningxafter
Hey! Same here! Have you looked into âDemiboyâ Iâve found thatâs what seems to fit me most as a he/they who is fine with presenting as masc most of the time but enjoys exploring their feminine and androgynous sides as well.
SableFox7
I hadn't heard of that, I'll have to look into it and see if it's my vibe, thanks!
morningxafter
No problem! I know a lot of people arenât big on labels, and neither am I. But I found that in this case, finding the word to define the way I felt really helped me come to terms with it.
Wryat
I feel you! Also hate the term man for myself but boy is completely fine.
yourfriendlyneighbourhoodtzimisce
I've excluded any that a) are dark/dysphoria-related b)have recently made the imgur rounds *that I'm aware of* or c) reference sexuality instead of just gender identity
yourfriendlyneighbourhoodtzimisce
yourfriendlyneighbourhoodtzimisce
scatter
Reminds me of this
yourfriendlyneighbourhoodtzimisce
yourfriendlyneighbourhoodtzimisce
yourfriendlyneighbourhoodtzimisce
thisisausernamelikeanyothersbutthisonesmellsweird
Grats on finding yourself. I am old tho.. What does nonbinary mean?..
RedOvermorrow
It means I don't identify myself as either male or female. For some people, that's because they're some mix of the two or somewhere in-between. For others, like me, it's because neither one fits right. I don't feel like I'm the wrong gender, I just feel like I don't have a right one, so I'm just opting to go without.
pixelscapes
The gender equivalent of âNo, thanksâ
amriorda
My favorite NB joke: Don't get into a fight with two enbys, because you might end up fighting Tooth and Nail for your life.
imabadger
Hahaha, that one is good. But my one friend doesn't understand it. Can someone explain it to them?
amriorda
A lot of enbys will choose their own name, and there is a large number who will just pick a name that is an object, like Tooth or Nail. So it's a play on words.
staceBugTerror
Don't get it
RedOvermorrow
Would you like me to explain more about it? Obviously I can't speak for all non-cis people, but I'd be happy to share my own experiences.
staceBugTerror
I think so but I just think I'll send myself daft tyring to figure out how can anyone not be a boy or a girl. Please do not take any comment I make to heart
RedOvermorrow
If someone were to refer to you by the wrong pronouns (like calling you she when you're a he) there's an instinctive pushback. You know internally that it's wrong, that that gender isn't actually yours. It's hard to feel what your right gender is while you're experiencing it; it's only when something goes wrong there that you actually see what it is and what it means to you. I feel that same pushback, except I feel it for either set of pronouns. He doesn't feel right, but neither does she.--
RedOvermorrow
It's not that I have the *wrong* gender, I just... don't have a right one. Neither one fits right, and trying to go by 'he' just makes me feel like I'm cramming myself into a too-small sweater. It's constricting, confining, uncomfortable, and just doesn't fit right. Same with 'she'. There's an inherent discomfort. Each sweater's too small and doesn't fit right, so I'm just not going to wear a sweater.
staceBugTerror
In your dna are u male or female?
VosperOfAntarctica
I identity as NB and have been favoring they/them pronouns more lately. Everyone down here where I am has been really supporive. Still one of the guys, dude and duder are fine. The way Janet from The Good Place says "not a girl" strikes a chord w me.
Not a man.
flack9099
I summise this is problem.
DigiT00l
You misspelled "I am the problem"
ShaunDreclin
I always liked how it was never made out to be a big deal in the good place, they just stated it matter-of-factly to correct anyone who got it wrong
TheLordFoxington
NB myself, pronouns He/they. One of the strangest things to me is the complete lack of change in my life after coming out. I did it for myself, but it still felt odd...
DigiT00l
I love Crowley in Good Omens "good man" "sorry, neither"
Brainzaps
Sincere question as a non-native english speaker regarding pronouns: they/them reference to a plural. So why does it make sense for non-binary identities to use above pronouns? Isnât it confusing in regards what is really meant? A multiple or a singular? Why isnât there a idea or demand to implement a new pronoun which isnât already used with itâs own definition? Like for example xe in addition to he/she. They/Them make sense for a physical singular person with dissociative identity disorder
butteredlemonpoundcake
Perhaps think of it like this: you could point out a person who has a blue shirt, your friend asks "who?", you point to them and say "them". That answer is correct. In English you can say "It's not their problem", which can refer to any individual (or group). You could say "he" or "she", but "their" is perfectly acceptable. Language is confusing for any non native speaker. And dissociative identity disorder is verrrrrrrrry different than being non-binary. DID is a mental illness.
DigiT00l
It has been used as a gender neutral 3rd person singular since about 60 years after the word was invented, though back then more as an "in case we don't know gender" as it is a lot easier to say than he/she
Like:
Person A: my friend had an accident
Person B: oh no, are they alright?
People have been trying to make another gender neutral pronoun for 3rd person singular since the late 18th century, at least in English, nothing caught on though, except for xe which dates back to 1810 iirc
DigiT00l
But it never became mainstream other than being used as a possible example
AjKaramba
It is confusing - we don't always have context to determine if it's used as singular or plural. Clear terms are important to have good communication in any language.
DigiT00l
Idk, the lowly people in the late 14th century got it easily enough
Leithoa
It's really not confusing. You're making it way harder than it needs to be.
AjKaramba
It's common sense. New words are "invented" all the time so communication can be clear, efficient and unambiguous. For example, we use 'CIS' so we don't have to explain and write 'a person whose gender identity aligns with the sex they were assigned at birth' in order to be understood.
Leithoa
Singular they isn't new. It's been around for hundreds of years and predates singular you. cis- isn't an acronym so no need to make it all caps. Cis- is a latin prefix not a new word.
VoxVocisVerum
New pronoun options are being used, but no consensus has yet been reached. Meanwhile, the singular usage of "they/them" has been accepted in English since at least the year 1375. Its purpose is to stand in for "he" or "she" when the gender of the subject is unknown to the speaker. Example: "Look, someone lost their checkbook! I hope they return so I can give it back to them."
FetteredJuvenescence
It's also common to say things like "So I was talking to my friend, and *they* said..." even when the gender of the person in question is established or semi-established. Such as "I was talking with my friend Susan and they said that..." So it's not *just* indeterminate gender.
Quixus
Especially the Susan example sounds wrong to me.
FetteredJuvenescence
It's quite normal to use, though it may certainly be regional. I live on the US west coast, and I'd imagine it's different in different countries. Heck, grammar rules actually aren't even consistent within the US and vary from area to area.